HereIAm321

Man, my ISM sure is chattering loudly today. Always does on beautiful days when I'm in a good mood.

Odelle

Just tell it to shut up and go on and enjoy your day!

HereIAm321

"You're in such a great mood! Let's put you in a *wonderful* mood! Know what be a great addition to your happiness? Adulterant X, Y, and Z!!!! Come on, you can control it. You only need just a little bit, and then you'll be at the pinnacle of your day!"

Addiction is a disease of "MORE MORE MORE! BETTER BETTER BETTER!!!"

Ugh.

Nonsensical

ISM shuts the hole above its chin
or else ISM gets the hose again

least

Stay strong and ignore that voice. It's lying to you.

Odelle

Just remember, if you could control it, you wouldn't be here in the first place! Hang in there HereIAm321, the cravings will subside. Keep telling yourself that those cravings are coming from the "primitive" part of your brain and that you have evolved and no longer need to act on every impulse!

Dee74

Alcohol makes nothing better - not for folk like us.
don't feed into the lie HIA.

go do something with your day
D

HereIAm321

Getting myself to a meeting. This ISM nagging is doing me in.

HereIAm321

Oh Man I reallllly needed a meeting today. My Gollum has been screaming at me since I woke up. Not necessarily to drink, but to do something anything to make my day better (and I'm in a great mood, that's how insane addiction is).

Kept hemming and hawing about making it to my home group meeting. Went back to my place and sat on the chair, "ok I'm gonna answer a few emails. Ill go, but just give me like 10 minutes."

And my Smeagol kept rising from the depths, saying "get to that meeting. Get to that meeting. Now."

And Gollum replied "oh I will, it's ok to be late"

Smeagol said "better to be 20 minutes late than 30 minutes late, go NOW."

Gollum says "I WILL, just give me a minute!"

Smeagol said "Get to that meeting. GO NOW GET IN THE CAR AND LEAVE NOW."

Gollum said "okayyyy just lemme put away my laundry first!"

Smeagol said "NO YOU GO NOW, NOW NOW!" And I kept hearing in my head "go now. Get to that meeting. GO. NOW NOW NOW."

NOW NOW NOW !!!!!!!

Enough so that it almost felt as if he were yelling in my goddamn ear & literally physically *pushing me out the door.*

I ran out that door soooooo ******* fast and SPED to that meeting.

Heart rate has lowered, breathing has calmed down...so **** you Gollum!

(Apologies for the profanity.)

FeenixxRising

What does ISM stand for? Short for alcoholism? Or is it an acronym?

HereIAm321

Yeah, ISM is basically the addictive voice (AV) of alcoholism/addiction. Alcohol-ism. I usually use the term "AV," but in my meeting today I referred to it as my "ism."

FeenixxRising

Got it. Thanks.

Coldfusion

It's good to hear from you!

Thanks for posting!

∞CF