trikyriky

I am hoping to get some response from recovered crack/ cocaine addict. Some of you may know me I have posted day one before , but this time seems different. I want it bad. I actually get excited about it but woke up in a panic this Easter Sunday. I struggle each day , right now one foot in front of the other. I want it . I want to feel normal. 30 years an addict, smoke 40 cigs a day ( next to quit not now ) . I feel like crap right now, tell me it gets better

Weasel1966

I wanted to feel normal as well. Saying no at first is the scary part. Feeling those feelings of life coming back is amazing with each no you say. Speak it outloud when you do it. Let your voice be heard by you. not just think it. It helped me.

Stay around here today Ricky.

K

DaveyT

Trikyriky I didn't see any replies to this yet so I wanted to throw one in so you know you're not alone. My drug is alcohol but addictions are all very similar and the greatest truth of hem all is that it does get better with abstinence. It takes time for your brain to go back to normal but if you start using again then you're just prolonging the inevitable. There are only two outcomes to any addiction, death or recovery.

One thing I know form the research is that people who give up any drug, whether it's alcohol, concaine or heroin are more likly to relapse if they still smoke. I know it mus be awful even to contemplate it but quitting those will help you stay clean from everything else.

Best of luck mate, I know you wanted replies from crack addicts but I just felt you needed at least some kind of reply quickly.

Take care.

trikyriky

My heartfelt thanks for early response Weasel Davey

Anna

I'm glad you posted that you are struggling, and I hope you feel better as the day goes on.

Each time you get through a craving, you get a little bit stronger.

IWillWin

Ricky - it does get better. I promise. It is going to suck for a while but your body and brain will slowly adjust and you will gain clarity that you most likely have forgotten was possible.

For me, I decided the guilt, shame, and just all around lunacy of my drinking days was just too much. I knew that eventually it would claim me - and I kinda wanted to hold on to all the good things I'd worked so hard for.

So I quit. Easier said than done, but I did it. Today I choose a sober life. I look better, feel better and am generally better to be around. I don't do stupid things, I don't call people and not remember what I said, I don't walk around in a daze, and I don't feel sorry for myself all the time. And that is the short list of what I've found here on the other side.

You are making a wise choice. I wish you all the best in this time of chaos. It WILL get better.

least

Hoping you start feeling better soon. And yes, if you stay clean it will get better.

Impurrfect

It does get better, I promise. I told myself I would give recovery my all for 6 months. If it didn't "work", well crack was everywhere and I knew where to get it.

I don't think it was even half that time that I just knew, I wasn't going to go back out.

Something that helped me was to tell myself "not an option...next!" every time I thought of crack (a zillion times a day, at first). "next" was a cue to distract myself. I also remembered my relapse, and how I was miserable high and I was miserable afterward.

In time, I found myself at "next" without even realizing I'd thought of crack. I also spent a LOT of time here, stayed busy with work and it didn't hurt that I was dealing with consequences of having some very angry/hurt family members.

Hang in there, sweetie.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Delilah1

Hi Tricky,

Alcohol is my issue, and I am starting out today again as well. I am going to try Rational Recovery. I bought it a while ago and never got around to doing more than skimming it. I was able to remain sober for three months and they keys for me were checking in here daily, reading about recovery and exercise. I also was meeting with a counselor.

In January I stopped doing all but the exercise and found myself slipping slowly back into a daily habit. I started this morning by emailing my counselor to get an appointment this week, and will be on here daily again. I am also going to start with the reading again. I know that I need to continue to work on my recovery daily, maybe you can look into some things that will help you with your journey. Looking forward to seeing you on SR!

2granddaughters

triky, are you attending NA meetings?

I could never stay sober and feel normal until I committed to AA.

All the best.

Bob R