melivinsober

56 days sober. I've had urges, of course. But nothing like today. I had such a craving to visit oblivion today. It was so strong it was almost like knowing the future. I could remember how good it felt to feel the numbness and the uncaring reckless bliss. I wanted it. My mind went silent except for the visualization of vodka-cranberry. I heard my inner self say "F*** it all" in an alluring voice. All thoughts of responsibility no longer existed. I was nowhere and all I cared about was that drink. Then... BLAM!! "What the hell am I thinking?!"

Someone said today at a meeting, "It's okay to have urges. It's how I act on them that's important."

I agree with him. As strong as that urge was, it barely lasted a minute. I'm glad I was among supportive family at the time. Still trying... Still sober... That memory was so good though...

--melvin--

HealingMySoul

I sooooooo know what you mean about the urges. I have had them A LOT lately. You're right though they usually go away as quick as they came

HealingMySoul

Oh and GREAT JOB on not giving in!!!

LadyinBC

They definately do pop up from time to time and always at the oddest times! AT least for me anyways. I'm just thankful that I don't give into the urges and realize that I don't have to anymore. That for me is the key.

Grymt

I've heard of it but hadn't experienced it till this morning. I dreamt vividly that I was frantically trying to find a paper and slip to get a bet on before the bell. The setting the people etc were so real and I woke up buzzed. that buzz buzz buzz . Funny I was just reminding myself not to take my sobriety for granted yesterday. I should make that taking for granted my seeming grasp on my addictive personality. Phew.

Good thinking not to act on the urges.
Learn from them.

least

I'm glad you let the urge fade away instead of acting on it.

fortysix

yeh good work.ill be in the same boat soon

DaveyT

Yeah I noticed during the 3 months I was sober that as time went on the urges were further apart but often more intense. After reading a lot about brain chemistry in recovery it does make sense. The cells are getting used to life without alcohol and occasionally they become overactive and cry out for it. I've had those times where you just have to grab the kitchen counter and hold on until they pass.

melivinsober

Have you had urges yet?