documenting cold turkey withdrawal
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Join Date: Mar 2013
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documenting cold turkey withdrawal
hi, my name is harry. i am 23 years old. i am, as many before me have done, going to document my abstinence from alcohol. to date i have lost a 4 year relationship, acquired a criminal record (x2 but never hurt anyone!), dropped out of university and developed social anxiety disorder all courtesy of alcohol. my mother was an alcoholic and i had easy access to alcohol so at 15 my drinking began, she is not to blame. i am in the uk so after 17/18 i gave up everything to be in bars all day, every day.
today i have had two bottles of red wine which i finished by approximately 4am. by 9 am i had signed up here. i feel clear headed, i feel like i could deliver a speech to a crowd of 1000 but i know if i walked down the street right now, people would rightly be avoiding me. i dont know how long i have been awake but i would guess 20 hours. i have just been for a cigarette and i felt even better until i lay down again. now i am fighting back the vomit but i have cool water with pure lemon juice squeezed in to keep it down. now my heartbeat is back to normal. i know i am exhausted but closing my eyes is like watching a 3 movies at one time, i will be awake for a long time yet. i dont feel ill and i am staying in bed. its time to put on the tv and drink more lemon water 10:06 am.
today i have had two bottles of red wine which i finished by approximately 4am. by 9 am i had signed up here. i feel clear headed, i feel like i could deliver a speech to a crowd of 1000 but i know if i walked down the street right now, people would rightly be avoiding me. i dont know how long i have been awake but i would guess 20 hours. i have just been for a cigarette and i felt even better until i lay down again. now i am fighting back the vomit but i have cool water with pure lemon juice squeezed in to keep it down. now my heartbeat is back to normal. i know i am exhausted but closing my eyes is like watching a 3 movies at one time, i will be awake for a long time yet. i dont feel ill and i am staying in bed. its time to put on the tv and drink more lemon water 10:06 am.
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Newcastle, UK
Posts: 571
Morning Harry, I admire your bravery and determination for doing this cold turkey.
As Dee has reminded us, if you at all feel too unwell, doctors have an abundance of ways to lessen the physical/mental effects of withdrawal and safeguard your health.
Keep posting here, it's certainly helping me
Best of luck!
As Dee has reminded us, if you at all feel too unwell, doctors have an abundance of ways to lessen the physical/mental effects of withdrawal and safeguard your health.
Keep posting here, it's certainly helping me
Best of luck!
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 11
end of day 1
coming up to 21 hours now, i dont feel too bad just a little agitated. i have been resting all day and i have had nothing but tomato soup, bread and of course my lemon water. i am mentally exhausted as i have not yet managed to sleep and i think it is finally going to come at 00:45 am. thank you for the kind messages
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: My city of ruins...
Posts: 593
Harry - you are brave and courageous. Be sure to seek medical help of things take a turn. I detoxed on my own and although I was ready to head for the ER if necessary I managed to make it thru in one piece. I would NOT want to do that again though. I was terrified.
Once the yuckies were over I swore I'd never do it again. It is like giving yourself the flu. And it can be completely avoided. Just don't drink again. One day at a time.
Stay strong and be well...we've all been there and know how hard it is. You can do it!!!
Once the yuckies were over I swore I'd never do it again. It is like giving yourself the flu. And it can be completely avoided. Just don't drink again. One day at a time.
Stay strong and be well...we've all been there and know how hard it is. You can do it!!!
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 11
day 2 has been pretty awful i am using all of my concentration now just type each word, its 23:55 pm.
i had very disturbed sleep last night, it was almost as though my eyes were closed but my mind was racing (no coherent thoughts, more like flicking through 1000's of tv channels) and i was very much so awake for the whole night. i knew this was my brain compensating for the usual huge dose of liquid depressants to bring everything back to "normal" so at 6 am i decided to get up and work my way slowly through the day.
it is easter sunday and i had a family meal to attend which i was dreading. i made a large spicy virgin mary (bloody mary is my normal breakfast of choice) and took that along with some plain toast for a long bath. i also put on a podcast so that i could close my eyes and concentrate on following the podcast which stopped my mind from racing. i managed one piece of toast and finished the virgin mary and went to lie down for an hour at about 8am, continuing with my podcast.
at 11am i got changed and turned my mind towards the family meal. anxiety kicked in here and i was concerned that everyone would see what was going on (i have hidden my ways completely from almost all of my family). i got control of my breathing with long deep breaths and decided i would simply say i was ill from the start, which i did. it was a bit of a nightmare, i couldnt respond to simple questions and when i did form the sentence i wanted to say in my mind, it came out shaky and it was as if i was out of breath. i think the worst moment was having to pour a glass of wine for someone (i was not tempted here, my extreme discomfort with my situation was a priority!) and of course i put more outside the glass than in it. i forced down soup to start which set off the sweats (they have been with me right up to now) and ended up leaving my main course completely. i did drink plenty of iced water.
after 3 hours of this around 15:00 we left (i had a lift from my dad thank god) and when i got home i changed out of my sweat soaked shirt and made another virgin mary. i felt a huge amount of relief and having calmed down i thought about how easily a few vodkas would get rid of all my flu-like symptoms but a spicy virgin mary is proving to be a good substitute so far. i went to bed at around 16:30 and put on the radio. i did eventually fall asleep but again my sleep was full of vivid and disturbing dreams (plane crash dreams seem to be flavor of the month) and i slept on and off until 21:00 pm.
since then i have had another bath, a mug of chicken soup and two pints of water. i am now becoming very twitchy, mainly in my legs. my brain feels too big to fit in my head and despite my liquid diet i am feeling dehydrated, my eyes feel like they have sand in them. its now 00:39 so it has taken 45 minuted to write this. i am going to put on the simpsons and hope that sleep comes again soon.
i had very disturbed sleep last night, it was almost as though my eyes were closed but my mind was racing (no coherent thoughts, more like flicking through 1000's of tv channels) and i was very much so awake for the whole night. i knew this was my brain compensating for the usual huge dose of liquid depressants to bring everything back to "normal" so at 6 am i decided to get up and work my way slowly through the day.
it is easter sunday and i had a family meal to attend which i was dreading. i made a large spicy virgin mary (bloody mary is my normal breakfast of choice) and took that along with some plain toast for a long bath. i also put on a podcast so that i could close my eyes and concentrate on following the podcast which stopped my mind from racing. i managed one piece of toast and finished the virgin mary and went to lie down for an hour at about 8am, continuing with my podcast.
at 11am i got changed and turned my mind towards the family meal. anxiety kicked in here and i was concerned that everyone would see what was going on (i have hidden my ways completely from almost all of my family). i got control of my breathing with long deep breaths and decided i would simply say i was ill from the start, which i did. it was a bit of a nightmare, i couldnt respond to simple questions and when i did form the sentence i wanted to say in my mind, it came out shaky and it was as if i was out of breath. i think the worst moment was having to pour a glass of wine for someone (i was not tempted here, my extreme discomfort with my situation was a priority!) and of course i put more outside the glass than in it. i forced down soup to start which set off the sweats (they have been with me right up to now) and ended up leaving my main course completely. i did drink plenty of iced water.
after 3 hours of this around 15:00 we left (i had a lift from my dad thank god) and when i got home i changed out of my sweat soaked shirt and made another virgin mary. i felt a huge amount of relief and having calmed down i thought about how easily a few vodkas would get rid of all my flu-like symptoms but a spicy virgin mary is proving to be a good substitute so far. i went to bed at around 16:30 and put on the radio. i did eventually fall asleep but again my sleep was full of vivid and disturbing dreams (plane crash dreams seem to be flavor of the month) and i slept on and off until 21:00 pm.
since then i have had another bath, a mug of chicken soup and two pints of water. i am now becoming very twitchy, mainly in my legs. my brain feels too big to fit in my head and despite my liquid diet i am feeling dehydrated, my eyes feel like they have sand in them. its now 00:39 so it has taken 45 minuted to write this. i am going to put on the simpsons and hope that sleep comes again soon.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 26
Almost exactly described how I felt for the first 72 hours. Try to keep yourself distracted and stay in direct contact with others if possible. After 5 days the worst for me was over. I am "lucky" to have a day job which kept me busy during those days and with half of my colleagues having had or coming down with flu I "blended in" so to speak and was able to pull through.
You can do this Harry, from what I can tell you are strong and intelligent and still have a great future ahead of you.
You can do this Harry, from what I can tell you are strong and intelligent and still have a great future ahead of you.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 11
day 3, 22:53 pm as expected and as you will all have guessed last nights sleep was much the same as the previous except being drenched in sweat each time i woke up. i dont worry about that, i know it is my body getting rid of all the toxins as best as it can, tonight i have a large soft towel to sleep on to make things more comfortable when i inevitably wake up in the same state. for anyone reading getting ready for a detox, keep plenty of water to hand, i am finding i very hard to keep hydrated.
like yesterday my day began at 6 am, i had no desire for a virgin mary today i felt very exhausted and the shakes were coming on and got worse throughout the day so i had a pint of fresh orange juice for breakfast. i had a warm bath (i noticed this made shakes a little better) and i did as little as possible all day. i went back to bed and lay with my eyes closed but i constantly heard a muffled radio or just sounds of people talking. there was no one there and the radio was off so i put the radio on but quitely which stopped me thinking i was going insane and as cleargoals say, kept my mind distracted. i was able to fall in and out of sleep throughout the day perhaps for 30 minute periods - that is all i did until around 19:00 pm.
i had only had orange juice and water (sipping as and when i woke up) by 19:00 pm and i felt slightly hungry but it was more a craving for salt than anything. i decided to leave solids until tomorrow as liquids are easier to digest so i made tomato soup. i have a good stock of healthy foods in anticipation of last weekend and this week, i will move to solids properly tomorrow.
i think that cleargoals has made a good point here "keep yourself distracted and stay in direct contact with others if possible". i am finding this far more psychologically challenging than i am physically. it really is like a demon doing his (or her!) worst to try and make me turn to drink. i dont have anyone but i have the radio and this keeps me distracted and it stops my thoughts becoming dark and depressing but i can imagine having a girlfriend here this weekend would have made things a lot easier. i guess that is part of the parcel when you orientate your life around drink rather than people.
this will all change though. i have perspective so i know i have no reason to want to just cry or wallow in spontaneous despair, i know it is just temporary, i know i am fortunate with plenty to look forward to. and that is what i will keep telling myself until it is automatically my first thought in the morning.
23:29 pm i am getting ready to try and sleep, i do not feel hungry but i feel very thirsty and i still have the feeling of dry tired eyes. i do not need glasses but it seems like i do when i look at the screen so i am still a bit disorientated and spaced out. when i lie still the twitching is probably at its worst. i think today has been the worst, i hope that it will slowly get easier from tomorrow.
my final thought for today is, do not begin a detox without the simpsons box set. i will be putting it on shortly until i drift off to sleep.
like yesterday my day began at 6 am, i had no desire for a virgin mary today i felt very exhausted and the shakes were coming on and got worse throughout the day so i had a pint of fresh orange juice for breakfast. i had a warm bath (i noticed this made shakes a little better) and i did as little as possible all day. i went back to bed and lay with my eyes closed but i constantly heard a muffled radio or just sounds of people talking. there was no one there and the radio was off so i put the radio on but quitely which stopped me thinking i was going insane and as cleargoals say, kept my mind distracted. i was able to fall in and out of sleep throughout the day perhaps for 30 minute periods - that is all i did until around 19:00 pm.
i had only had orange juice and water (sipping as and when i woke up) by 19:00 pm and i felt slightly hungry but it was more a craving for salt than anything. i decided to leave solids until tomorrow as liquids are easier to digest so i made tomato soup. i have a good stock of healthy foods in anticipation of last weekend and this week, i will move to solids properly tomorrow.
i think that cleargoals has made a good point here "keep yourself distracted and stay in direct contact with others if possible". i am finding this far more psychologically challenging than i am physically. it really is like a demon doing his (or her!) worst to try and make me turn to drink. i dont have anyone but i have the radio and this keeps me distracted and it stops my thoughts becoming dark and depressing but i can imagine having a girlfriend here this weekend would have made things a lot easier. i guess that is part of the parcel when you orientate your life around drink rather than people.
this will all change though. i have perspective so i know i have no reason to want to just cry or wallow in spontaneous despair, i know it is just temporary, i know i am fortunate with plenty to look forward to. and that is what i will keep telling myself until it is automatically my first thought in the morning.
23:29 pm i am getting ready to try and sleep, i do not feel hungry but i feel very thirsty and i still have the feeling of dry tired eyes. i do not need glasses but it seems like i do when i look at the screen so i am still a bit disorientated and spaced out. when i lie still the twitching is probably at its worst. i think today has been the worst, i hope that it will slowly get easier from tomorrow.
my final thought for today is, do not begin a detox without the simpsons box set. i will be putting it on shortly until i drift off to sleep.
Aka.. Indamiricale. :)
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Dr.Bob's Neighbor
Posts: 2,728
I have had a couple bad detox's one wound up in the ICU..
Here is my first one at home here..
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ty-1-time.html
Just yourself, and anyone that has loved you.. 
Here is my first one at home here..
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ty-1-time.html
hi, my name is harry. i am 23 years old. i am, as many before me have done, going to document my abstinence from alcohol. to date i have lost a 4 year relationship, acquired a criminal record (x2 but never hurt anyone!),
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