Viperidae

I got a really sore throat, because I think I'm getting a cold, but I've been fighting the urges since 4pm, its now 8pm, and I'm over it. Getting a cold and I still want booze?

It's that feeling in your chest where it feels like there's just a hole. Now I am already at the state of being like "what now???" And lonely and I guess scared. I really want out of my apartment but I have to redo the whole place before i can leave. I put stucco on every inch of a massive loft apartment and they want it gone or else. I've been avoiding it for a year. I put it up while drunk and high and it took weeks. Uggggg. I wish I had a thousand or more to pay them off. I might have to jump ship, get sued and never pay it. Although people in the know say they will never come after someone who has no income and no assets. They can't come after my disability check.

Then I would go stay with the parents for a while to get back on my feet. The bar is right outside right now!!!

Viperidae

sorry about the typos i meant 'its 8' and 'now i am already at the state of"

sugarbear1

Is it time to start working on that stucco? Actions change feelings!

Viperidae

Yes sugarbear, but right now my joints are killing me and I'm exhausted from withdrawals. I am physically useless. Maybe in a week??? This is tough work. Like 4 guys in white plastic suits for 5 days work.

least

I hope you can resist going to the bar. And hope you can get the stucco off before you have to move.

2granddaughters

If you could stucco a loft apartment what is your disability?

Bailing on the owner won't do much for your sobriety.

All the best.

Bob R

Viperidae

I AM NOT GOING TO THE BAR. Thats me being determined? Anyway, i'm not going. It would make me feel even worse. I have to get up and call my DOC at 7am to try to get in and see him for my aching joints and to have all my blood work done, so I know whats up with my body.

And I have to try the walls, if it I cant do it, forget them, and they can't get blood from a stone. But I would like to leave here in good standing.

Mizzuno

How about a nice cup of tea? It might help you to feel better. How about putting on a movie and tackling the Stucco situation when you feel better?

Viperidae

Thanks, I just called my best friend and she will be here in 15 minutes. thank goodness for a real true soul of pure kindness that she is. And she will sleep on my couch. Unfortunately I called my dad to talk about the walls and he berated the heck out of me. made me feel about 1 inch tall, so I called my friend and she's coming. Worry about walls next week I guess. I just get so obsessive about them, when I'm not drinking and this is only 4 days so what do I expect... the world to change?