RhysDaRyda1994

Hello all, i am 19 years old, male, first time trying to get sober, for myself this time. Not for family and friends, although they are part of the reason. I graduated high school, and my parents sent me to rehab. i didnt want to go, obviously but i saw it as a way to get them off of my back when i go back. I smoked weed every day, drank and did ecstasy on weekends, did mushrooms about 1 or twice a month, but once i started doing xanax and oxycontin thats when my life got bad. i barely passed senior year of high school. so, i sorta wanted to go to rehab, but not really at the same time. about 2 weeks into the rehab, i started to get serious about recovery after doing notebooks on who i hurt, how much money ive spent/wasted, how i got in trouble legally, etc. i talked to my counselor about recovery homes or after care programs. I found one, and talked to my parents about it. They were all for it. I went to rehab on July 27, 2012 and got to my after care program on September 6, 2012. It is a year long program (for the most part) and i have been here for about 6 months. I have been sober, going to meetings daily, been with good kids my age (18-26) and i like it here alot. Recently i've been having thoughts of drinking when i leave here, like i said this is my first time trying to get sober so i havent experienced trying only drinking on weekends, or only smoking weed. i know it cant, but my mind keeps saying i can. so i figured id step up my game, join some sites, do more reading, go to more meetings, all that stuff. i do have a sponsor and call him daily and working the steps. went over the 8th step with him last week. i will be visiting home around Easter and will hopefully make my amends to my family and family friends (if i dont b*tch out). but anyways, new to the site, looking to be active here, gonna try to visit it at least once a day.
have a good night.
ps - any activities you guys have, all i did before was drugs and i want to find new things i like so im not bored all the time.

freshstart57

Hi, Rhys, glad you found us here. Good for you for reaching out and taking some action about your drug and alcohol use.

First, about the things you can and can't do. I advise against just drinking on the weekend, or just smoking weed, or just doing any part of what you used to do. You can't, based on what you have been through. What you can do on the other hand, is quit this stuff altogether. By this I mean that it will be OK if you do, things will be better for you, and most of all you will have the satisfaction of knowing that you did this best hardest thing.

Thinking that being straight and on top of your game all the time as being deprived of something is a problem that needs to be fixed. That idea will lead you wrong. Think of it as it really is - by drinking and smoking and drugging you are depriving yourself of all the things that make life good, and you are depriving yourself of the chance to find them and make them for yourself. By drinking and drugging, you are depriving yourself of you.

Onward, Rhys, and keep posting.

deeker

Pull out them notebooks!

ForMy2Boys

You're right to keep researching and asking for help, you have worked too hard and for too long to give up being sober. Hopefully these thoughts will subside by the time you permanently. Stay strong, you are young, but youth does not need to be defined by alcohol and drugs. Maybe take up Basketball or go to the driving range every once in a while. Good Luck. Don't know what your interests are, but there are hobbies/activities perfect for you.