Stash

I've been trying my best to be positive and to spread the positive vibe. I guess I went about it in the wrong way. I ended up feeling horrible in the end of it. I offended someone instead.Im in no way close to this person just know each other through drinking and was a friend on facebook. This person stated that I was a judgmental ******* for saying "i wanted to drink today bc im not angry anymore. booze disgusts me and it caused me nothing but sadness n anger. for those of you struggling keep going because your life will only get better".

I guess my status stirred up some sort of emotions.
This person said drinking is ok as long as he/she isn't doing drugs by sticking themselves with a needle or snorting pills.All that because I wanted to let my friends know if they need to talk that im here. That no one has to go through that stuff alone.

I dont know how to feel about it. It makes me not want to say anything about being sober ever again in fear that someone will be offended by my words no matter how positive I try to be.

no one liked me drunk and no one likes me sober.. thats kinda how im seeing things. I know thats false and I have all kinds of support from friends and family. Being sober especially in the early stages of recovery can make you feel lonely even with all the support. Times like this make me wanna get drunk. Just drink this feeling away so i can go see that person n punch them in the face. Im not going to tho. Id rather let this feeling pass bc i know it will. 1 day at a time.. breaking the cycle.

sorry for venting..

Fitness1234

Hey Stash...

You can only control what you say and do, you cannot control how another person will react to it. You shouldnt let anyone make you feel what you say is invaluable. You can say what you want to say and feel the way you want too.

This is not worth drinking over, nothing really is. When I get down and lonely, i just try to go for a walk/run, watch tv or go to a meeting. Cheer up, everything will get better. I get lonely also, i just try to stay busy and try to stay positive.

Never say sorry for venting, that is why we are all here

Mizzuno

Hello. Please dont be sorry for venting. Ya know, I find Facebook and texting to be problematic. I think people take things out of context because we are not speaking face to face or over the phone. I can see how that response from this person would put you in a sour mood. We are here though Stash. You made the right decision by posting here instead of drinking. Bravo Stash!!!

Stash

thanks fitness and mizzuno. i know its no reason to drink .. just the old ways want to come back. breaking habits its hard not impossible but hard.

Mizzuno

This is not a easy road my friend and I commend you for walking it

Palimpsest

Facebook sucks. I've been on it since 2004 and have seen it progress. People post way too much information for others to see, and it's there forever... companies, future employers, the government... permanent record. You never know what the smallest post can be used for in some weird situation in the future, for example, someone talking about their addiction for insurance providers to see that you have a substance abuse problem. I'm just saying in general... you didn't do anything wrong and don't have anything to be regretting. That person was out of line, and that's who I am referring to. They sound insecure about their problems and that shows they do have a problem if they took offense to your broad post about alcohol. Alcohol is okay because they used to snort pills? Awful logic.

LadyinBC

The feeling will definately pass and yes it is lonely at the beginning. I no longer spoke to my "drinking" friends cause we just didn't have anything in common. It was the booze and our jobs that kept us together. I have 2 really good girlfriends left and they are my best best friends. And one of them is someone I never expected would be one. Neither one have drinking issues, but they so get me.

I find that I am not quite so worried about offending people anymore. And I definately no longer think that I have to do things or say things to please everyone else. If your sobriety stirs up emotions in someone else that is their issue, don't make it yours.

avocado

it sounds like the person is in denial and is lashing out. that's the only reason someone would take offense to what you said. a person who legitimately doesn't have issues drinking alcohol would understand that you're only talking about people with problems. please don't let it get to you. like fitness1234 says, you really can't control how people will react.

Lunetta

The best thing about Facebook is that you can easily unfriend or block negative people from your account! That's what I would do!

Stash

thats exactly what i did. lol

DryRoastJim

Heya Stash. That is great that you have that, because in times like this and when you feel lonely, maybe send them off a quick email or call them.
Don't waste your time getting gunned cuz some loud mouth made some stupid comment to your message, in fact, block the jerk! As you sober up, you'll find you'll be dropping "non essential personnel."
You're doing good, keep on it and everything will work itself out!!

No worries there, we'd rather you vent than drink.

I don't know how old you are, but one thing I noticed as I'm creeping up there, is yes, offending people (provided I'm not a jerk etc) means less and less, so does a bunch of other stuff!
Quitting drinking makes it even easier as now I KNOW I wasn't drunk and said something stupid haha

LadyinBC

Hi Jim,

I'll be 48 this year, so I have found that the older I get the less I care about what other people think. Being sober definately makes it even easier!

misspond

Sadly Stash, other people have their own agenda. It sounds as though you were genuinely offering words of hope and an individual took your words and meaning and attributed something else to them. Don't let it bother you and good on you for venting here on SR instead of drinking away your emotions.