Im still sober
 

Wow what a hectic , crazy week I am going through. I went back to work Monday and I don't know if its from being away for so long, I came back and was so overwhelm with it all, I just wanted to say f. It all of this, I don't wanna deal with any of this. I saw some old behaviour returning and I am scared. I am gonna go to a meeting tomorrow and hopefully it calms me down. Until then I gave you Guys and my sponsor.

I really really wanted to give up last night, instead I binge on food, which doesn't show that I deal with stress really well at all. I slept 4 hours and my solution to that was to drink a large coffee and take one more Ritalin ( I am prescribe 1/day) ... You can see where there could be a problem... I do

How do you guys , high functioning alky/dr function with the stress of your life, returning to work and sobriety? How do you delegate within you'd job description while being anonymous when dealing with your sobriety?

I did some work in step one last day and I am getting emotional memory flashback of the bad things I did, people I hurt, it really is thought on the self-esteem.

Thanks for your help,

I'm 11 day sober from alcohol and other drugs.

Prion!

Prion, keep in mind that you are just where you should be in your recovery. It takes time for things to somewhat balance out. You are sober at work and it will take awhile for your mindset to adjust to the regular stress and chaos you face at work. You don't need to disclose anything about your sobriety. It is your business and not anyone else's. The reality is that you are NOT the same person drunk when you are sober. What you did as far as the bad things and the people you hurt were because you were drunk. You are sober now. Don't dwell on your past. Just move on and make right decisions and live a right life.

Getting sober is one thing, remaining sober is another. Learning about yourself, especially in early sobriety is HARD. It's taxing. It's emotional. Yes, we all did terrible things to ourselves and to other people we "love." That is the past. Focus on today and if you live each day in an honorable and honest way, you will discover you are a much better person than you once were. YOu will accept the past, not be scared of the future and live each minute of every day. The beginning is tough. I cried alot. I've struggled. But, as each day passed and I learned, read and staying involved in my recovery, each and every minute gets brighter and brighter. I promise you.

Hi Prion

I think the first thing to realise is none of us are supermen - or women.

This sobriety thing is a huge upheaval and you will find situations that test you for a while.

Give yourself a break - you have 11 days, and you haven't drunk, you're reaching out for support and you're aware of the areas where you can do better, and cautious of old behaviours returning.

That's pretty good progress in my book :)

Stressing out about the way you handle stress is kinda self-defeating :)

If you're not happy with some of the things you did - think about what other ways you could have coped...try them next time? :)

D

Hi Prion and congratulations! Don't be too hard or judgmental on yourself. You have lived in a fog for however long and now you are slammed into reality!

The past is the past, you can't change it so don't try to. The future however is something you can and with knowledge from the past you can make yourself a great future!

You may find that you are more irritable, impatient etc. That is ok, but try to "count to 10" if you can. Although this is simple, it will allow you to take a couple seconds to look at a situation and attempt to make the best of it. This is still a huge problem for me, so I am not making it sound easy, but with time you will learn that in most cases it just not worth getting overly excited about some other persons faults/short comings etc.

With time, the irritability will fade away, your mind will become much clearer, things will make more sense. A good friend of mine told me this acronym:

S on
O f a
B itch
E verything is
R eal

Scarey at first, but totally true!

Be well and all the best!

I know it can be hard to do at first, but focus on one day at a time. Life when newly sober can seem very overwhelming...for me it was like seeing and feeling everything for the first time.

Not to mention you aren't sleeping well so this can add to your stress level. The first month of sobriety I would do days in intervals..get up, get ready for work. Do all the work I can until lunch break. Eat a healthy lunch, tool around on SR, call another alcoholic to chat etc. Then back to work. Get home, go to meeting, eat dinner, bed. Watch movies / read if I couldn't sleep. Hang in there...it gets easier & better as long as you stay sober. We are here for you and you can do this!