Hi, my name is Jim and I am an alcoholic
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Vancouver BC
Posts: 144
Hi, my name is Jim and I am an alcoholic
I have been drinking for 30+ years and thankfully there have been no impaired, car crashes, ruined marriages (being single makes that easier I guess haha), etc.
But I can't help but wonder how much time I lost, how many relationships I have blown, how many careers opportunities I ignored, how much money I pissed away, how much damage have I done to myself etc.
I think I fall into the class of a functioning alcoholic. (well use to).
I had a good job in IT, I lost it due to downsizing.
I blew my severance package within 6 months partying.
I have so little income now that homelessness is a real possibility.
I will be declaring bankruptcy on Monday.
There is no question, I have to quit drinking.
A couple weeks ago, I did 3 days sober and much to my amazement, it wasn't that difficult. But the biggest problem was sleep, I COULD NOT SLEEP!
I want to retry quiting again. 10+ years ago, I quit for almost 3 years, the first month or so was difficult, but once I had made through it got much easier to stay sober, so I know it can be done. But this time, the insomnia is just too great, it will be the biggest factor being able to maintain sobriety.
I have read many articles on here, and I feel this board offers genuine caring and support!
Perhaps, with the help from here, will power and a well planned "reasons to not drink" format, I have a fighting chance to kick our mutual enemy once and for good.
Jim
But I can't help but wonder how much time I lost, how many relationships I have blown, how many careers opportunities I ignored, how much money I pissed away, how much damage have I done to myself etc.
I think I fall into the class of a functioning alcoholic. (well use to).
I had a good job in IT, I lost it due to downsizing.
I blew my severance package within 6 months partying.
I have so little income now that homelessness is a real possibility.
I will be declaring bankruptcy on Monday.
There is no question, I have to quit drinking.
A couple weeks ago, I did 3 days sober and much to my amazement, it wasn't that difficult. But the biggest problem was sleep, I COULD NOT SLEEP!
I want to retry quiting again. 10+ years ago, I quit for almost 3 years, the first month or so was difficult, but once I had made through it got much easier to stay sober, so I know it can be done. But this time, the insomnia is just too great, it will be the biggest factor being able to maintain sobriety.
I have read many articles on here, and I feel this board offers genuine caring and support!
Perhaps, with the help from here, will power and a well planned "reasons to not drink" format, I have a fighting chance to kick our mutual enemy once and for good.
Jim
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
Welcome to the lifeboat, Jim. Grab an oar!
With you on the insomnia. After drinking myself to sleep for years, it REALLY works me over some days. I'd rather be awake and sober at 2 AM than drunk and passed out at 10 PM, wouldn't you?
You can always come here when the late nite gremlin is busy. There's always someone here to talk with.
With you on the insomnia. After drinking myself to sleep for years, it REALLY works me over some days. I'd rather be awake and sober at 2 AM than drunk and passed out at 10 PM, wouldn't you?
You can always come here when the late nite gremlin is busy. There's always someone here to talk with.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Welcome to SR Jim 
There's a good chance that you didn't sleep well on your 3 days off because of withdrawals from alcohol. I had the same thing but it only lasted a couple of weeks and now I sleep like a baby. It may be a good idea to talk to your doctor about stopping drinking. Glad you're here x
There's a good chance that you didn't sleep well on your 3 days off because of withdrawals from alcohol. I had the same thing but it only lasted a couple of weeks and now I sleep like a baby. It may be a good idea to talk to your doctor about stopping drinking. Glad you're here x
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Vancouver BC
Posts: 144
Wow! Thank you so much for the support and ideas. I know this has to happen, the time is right. I found (on another site but this might have these forms too,) several worksheets to keep up motivation. Reasons to drink, reasons not to drink, what do you like about it, what dont you like about it etc.
There was also one about Cost Benefit Analyses. This one really interests me, as you can actually see how booze just ROBs you of your cash!!
And in shear stroke of luck, I got a job interview for next week!! I now have even MORE reasons to fight!!
RE: Seeing a DR. The last time I had quit for those 3 years, I did see my doc before stopping. I have an anxiety condition that is managed but ironically, the meds that I take are typically used to offset some of the withdrawal symptoms.
And thankfully, my alcohol intake is about 6-8 beers nightly. In my current situation, I don't have a Dr.
I know in my heart this has to happen. I have to change and grow up. I am 46, the party is over - it is time to live!
@trachemys I suspect you will see me on the chat. And you are right, although I was very tired, there was no hangover!
There was also one about Cost Benefit Analyses. This one really interests me, as you can actually see how booze just ROBs you of your cash!!
And in shear stroke of luck, I got a job interview for next week!! I now have even MORE reasons to fight!!
RE: Seeing a DR. The last time I had quit for those 3 years, I did see my doc before stopping. I have an anxiety condition that is managed but ironically, the meds that I take are typically used to offset some of the withdrawal symptoms.
And thankfully, my alcohol intake is about 6-8 beers nightly. In my current situation, I don't have a Dr.
I know in my heart this has to happen. I have to change and grow up. I am 46, the party is over - it is time to live!
@trachemys I suspect you will see me on the chat. And you are right, although I was very tired, there was no hangover!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 3,062
I think it is so neat that you are 46...there are quite a few of us the same age on this site. There must be something magical about that age and realizing that we are getting older and really do need to grow up and start living a right life. Glad you are on board!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,507
You can definitely do this, Jim. I also drank for 30 yrs. and now have 5 yrs. sober. My drinking career ended just after I joined SR. I gathered all sorts of strength and courage from my friends here - and I knew I could rise above my old way of life.
I have many of the same regrets that you do, but I caution you to try & let them go as much as possible. Regret, remorse and guilt - sent me back to drinking a few times. I finally decided to be kind and patient with myself. The real you will shine through, and you'll have a wonderful, joyful 'rest of your life'. No more being numb and foggy. Be proud of yourself for seeing what needs to be done - and taking this big step. We're glad you found us.
I also drank for 30 yrs. and now have 5 yrs. sober. My drinking career ended just after I joined SR. I gathered all sorts of strength and courage from my friends here - and I knew I could rise above my old way of life.I have many of the same regrets that you do, but I caution you to try & let them go as much as possible. Regret, remorse and guilt - sent me back to drinking a few times. I finally decided to be kind and patient with myself. The real you will shine through, and you'll have a wonderful, joyful 'rest of your life'. No more being numb and foggy. Be proud of yourself for seeing what needs to be done - and taking this big step. We're glad you found us.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 171
Hi Jim,
All I can say is we have a lot of things in common that have happened due to being a alcoholic.
Broke,
Relationships,
Insomnia,
Bankruptcy.... which date is almost here to get this over and done with.
I can keep going also! Shall we read again what we have wrote? I see negative, negative and all bad and nothing good with what I am writing here.
The good thing and I know we are all different but after a little over a week I was constantly sleeping and still am tired. So it comes with the territory.
But we can go with positive thinking and focus on...
No alcohol,
Have money,
Relationship is amazing,
sleep well,
Bankruptcy well, fresh start. All positive will come for us with 1 decision and that is NO ALCOHOL!
to a great site Jim
All I can say is we have a lot of things in common that have happened due to being a alcoholic.
Broke,
Relationships,
Insomnia,
Bankruptcy.... which date is almost here to get this over and done with.
I can keep going also! Shall we read again what we have wrote? I see negative, negative and all bad and nothing good with what I am writing here.
The good thing and I know we are all different but after a little over a week I was constantly sleeping and still am tired. So it comes with the territory.
But we can go with positive thinking and focus on...
No alcohol,
Have money,
Relationship is amazing,
sleep well,
Bankruptcy well, fresh start. All positive will come for us with 1 decision and that is NO ALCOHOL!
to a great site Jim
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 47
Working out like a maniac helped me sleep in early sobriety (and still does).
There's no point in thinking about lost opportunities and money spent. We've all spend thousands of dollars on booze. You don't come to this forum without having paid your dues.
Good on you for the fresh start. You're on your way to a new life.
There's no point in thinking about lost opportunities and money spent. We've all spend thousands of dollars on booze. You don't come to this forum without having paid your dues.
Good on you for the fresh start. You're on your way to a new life.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Vancouver BC
Posts: 144
Guys (and gals), thank you so much for your support and kind words. I am just a huge emotional disaster crying my face off as i type this.
clight - you are so right, so much loss, no gain, FOR NOTHING! I accept that I ****** up, there was no one else but me.
I just can't say enough about how much more empowered I feel just with all of your kind and insightful words.
I see that this will change my life and I have proof - the success of you people!!
Thank you so much!!
clight - you are so right, so much loss, no gain, FOR NOTHING! I accept that I ****** up, there was no one else but me.
I just can't say enough about how much more empowered I feel just with all of your kind and insightful words.
I see that this will change my life and I have proof - the success of you people!!
Thank you so much!!
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