Something has to give.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brisbane Queensland
Posts: 43
Something has to give.
Hi everybody. I want to stop drinking, or at least cut down about 99%.
I am interested in secular recovery and have joined this forum as a way to hopefully make supportive connections and have some accountability.
It seems to me that most of my problems could be solved if I quit drinking. I would be happier, healthier and more productive. I do, however, have a tendency to forget this after a day or two, and think "oh I'd love to go drinking". Once having that thought I have an immediate adrenaline rush and feel as though a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I get a nervous sensation in my belly and all of my priorities go out the window. All I can think about is drinking. I really need help. The happiest I've ever been in my life was when I was sober, but I don't know how to get there. I want to get back to palace that I am proud of myself instead of ashamed.
Sorry for babbling. Please someone help me.
All my love to everyone, with most sincerity.
Wilting
I am interested in secular recovery and have joined this forum as a way to hopefully make supportive connections and have some accountability.
It seems to me that most of my problems could be solved if I quit drinking. I would be happier, healthier and more productive. I do, however, have a tendency to forget this after a day or two, and think "oh I'd love to go drinking". Once having that thought I have an immediate adrenaline rush and feel as though a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I get a nervous sensation in my belly and all of my priorities go out the window. All I can think about is drinking. I really need help. The happiest I've ever been in my life was when I was sober, but I don't know how to get there. I want to get back to palace that I am proud of myself instead of ashamed.
Sorry for babbling. Please someone help me.
All my love to everyone, with most sincerity.
Wilting
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 47
Hi Wilting.
I can certainly relate to this. I used to get this euphoric feeling on Fridays driving home from work because it meant I could drink my favorite bottle of wine. I'd feel good in that moment, but hate myself by the end of the weekend because I spent it hungover and just feeling awful.
I'm on day 13 and all I can think is, why did I give up my previous sobriety for all of the painful drinking of the past 2 years? I feel so much better and healthier and I know it will continue to get better the longer I stay sober.
You can do it. Think about all of the things you enjoy better when sober. That is helping me a lot right now.
I can certainly relate to this. I used to get this euphoric feeling on Fridays driving home from work because it meant I could drink my favorite bottle of wine. I'd feel good in that moment, but hate myself by the end of the weekend because I spent it hungover and just feeling awful.
I'm on day 13 and all I can think is, why did I give up my previous sobriety for all of the painful drinking of the past 2 years? I feel so much better and healthier and I know it will continue to get better the longer I stay sober.
You can do it. Think about all of the things you enjoy better when sober. That is helping me a lot right now.
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,064
Welcome, Wilting (and SoberKat)
There is a section of this forum for Secular Recovery, and another section for Secular 12-Step Recovery. Those sections of the forum do not see as much activity as the Newcomer's Forum, so this is a good place to discuss immediate concerns.
I am an atheist using AA and NA to keep me sober (I started out by spending a week in detox, then went to 90 meetings in 90 days). SoberRecovery helped me figure out some of the "religious" issues with AA and NA.
There is a section of this forum for Secular Recovery, and another section for Secular 12-Step Recovery. Those sections of the forum do not see as much activity as the Newcomer's Forum, so this is a good place to discuss immediate concerns.
I am an atheist using AA and NA to keep me sober (I started out by spending a week in detox, then went to 90 meetings in 90 days). SoberRecovery helped me figure out some of the "religious" issues with AA and NA.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brisbane Queensland
Posts: 43
Thank you so much for the replies! I have been lurking a tiny it in the secular recovery sections, and I guess red flags are immediately raised for me regarding this "Beast".
I do not want to go down a road to recovery only to find out I'm in a cult (yes, I'm catastrophising slightly I know) because I do not want my efforts and will shaken by the realisation that I'm surrounded by woo. Is this beast just a handy label for cognitive functions? I sincerely hope so.
I am shaken today, and having trouble thinking clearly. I had a massive weekend and lost my glasses. I need those to see. I woke up in a major panic (usual for me) and truly something must give. I'm sorry if I'm all over the place, and I always feel guilty for focussing on myself in conversations so please excuse my current self-focused attitude.
Thank you all again. I hope you realise how much a connection with others in a similar boat means to me.
I do not want to go down a road to recovery only to find out I'm in a cult (yes, I'm catastrophising slightly I know) because I do not want my efforts and will shaken by the realisation that I'm surrounded by woo. Is this beast just a handy label for cognitive functions? I sincerely hope so.
I am shaken today, and having trouble thinking clearly. I had a massive weekend and lost my glasses. I need those to see. I woke up in a major panic (usual for me) and truly something must give. I'm sorry if I'm all over the place, and I always feel guilty for focussing on myself in conversations so please excuse my current self-focused attitude.
Thank you all again. I hope you realise how much a connection with others in a similar boat means to me.
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,064
Wilting, I answered your post in the Secular forum. That is the best place for specific questions about "the Beast." We don't debate the merits of recovery programs here in the Newcomer's forum...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brisbane Queensland
Posts: 43
Thank you. Sorry. I'm not right in the head at the moment. I'm sober, don't get me wrong, but it's the day after. The hell day. I don't know what to do or where to go. Sorry if I am being negative.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brisbane Queensland
Posts: 43
I don't know how to be normal. I don't know how people have fun without obsessing about drinking. I'm crying and im a mess. I need help. Where do I get help? The person I live with doesn't know I have a problem because I hide it (probably not that well) but I can't even make a phone call or go somewhere for help without giving myself away.
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,064
I don't know how hard up you are but I had to go to detox for a week to get off alcohol. Quitting drinking can be dangerous--have you talked to your doctor? A doctor might prescribe something to ease withdrawal symptoms.
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
I tried cutting back 99% and for me it did'nt work . The only thing that stopped me getting blackout drunk was complete abstinance followed by learning how to deal with life and it's up's and down's sober .
It seemed unimagineable to go through life without a drink back then , now it seems unimaginable i'd ever let the crazyness of alcohol back into my life .
You can do this,
bestwishes, M
It seemed unimagineable to go through life without a drink back then , now it seems unimaginable i'd ever let the crazyness of alcohol back into my life .
You can do this,
bestwishes, M
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
Like Mecanix above me, I also found that the "99%" cutting down thing didn't work for me. Leaving that 1% door open is something we always do to help ourselves feel better, but when we are honest with ourselves, what's the point? I can't enjoy alcohol from time to time like others - so rather than leaving that 1% on the table I just found the best thing was to quit all together. Hope you do the same.
I am an anti-theist, and I have some concerns about the "cult" issue you mentioned earlier. But just like others, I also use AA - in fact I went to a meeting yesterday. You certainly CAN take things all the way in AA and really get involved, but for me it works just fine because quite frankly there aren't a whole lot of other options! So I use it when I please, go to meetings when I please, and take what I want from it and leave the rest. Better than nothing - and I know that with just 8 months of sobriety under my belt I'll take all the help I can get.
Secular forum here is decent, but you won't get much criticism of AA there either - but if you do have issues there are several of us with some experiences we can share via PM. All in all it's worth a shot IMO. Good luck!
I am an anti-theist, and I have some concerns about the "cult" issue you mentioned earlier. But just like others, I also use AA - in fact I went to a meeting yesterday. You certainly CAN take things all the way in AA and really get involved, but for me it works just fine because quite frankly there aren't a whole lot of other options! So I use it when I please, go to meetings when I please, and take what I want from it and leave the rest. Better than nothing - and I know that with just 8 months of sobriety under my belt I'll take all the help I can get.
Secular forum here is decent, but you won't get much criticism of AA there either - but if you do have issues there are several of us with some experiences we can share via PM. All in all it's worth a shot IMO. Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,462
Wilting, I do know how you feel. Being caught up in that addictive cycle is just so hard. I will say, that you just need to decide and use whatever tools work for you, AA, AVRT, SR...and get through those first few days. For me, each day builds strength. In the beginning it seems it will never get better but it does.
The "hell day", the day after, is the worst. Things will clear up. Give it a chance. You will be so very glad you did.
The "hell day", the day after, is the worst. Things will clear up. Give it a chance. You will be so very glad you did.
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