Ptcapote

I figured I would post this since I seem to recall seeing a thread about it a couple of weeks ago when the Midwest US was hit by snow.

So today is a "snow day" in DC which means no work for most of us and very limited public transport. (Nevermind that DC shuts down when precipitation levels hit the equivalent of what happens when you mistakenly leave your freezer door open for a few minutes but...not going to go there...emblematic of a much larger problem

Anyway, I used to LOVE snow days because they were, to me, free drinking days. No need to call in, the federal government just declared that I could have an entire day to get loaded AND still get paid! How generous of them!

So last night as everyone was "preparing" for this storm, I was saying silent prayers that for once, ONCE, DC would grow a pair and not shut down so I could go to work and not be in anyway tempted to drink. No such luck.

It is morning here and when I awoke to find out there was no work, my mind admittedly started the calculations that it used to do during snow days..."Is the liquor store open? Is it too icy to drive? How much will I need?" I couldn't believe that my mind just went there like nothing had changed. Broken record, man.

I obviously have not gone to the liquor store nor will I be going. I caught my thoughts and forced them in a new direction but that stuff really sneaks up on you! Guess this is what they call a trigger, right?

I have my AA meeting this evening and plenty of work to do for the day but this is going to be my first sober snow day in...well, many years.

So, overall Day 21 but Snow Day number 1.

Nonsensical

I find my mind still 'goes there' when the old patterns repeat (such as a snow day). My expectation is that this will fade as I establish new patterns. It's just a matter of time.

Have fun on your snow day!

sugarbear1

Make sure your meeting is still on!

Zalula

I'm right there with you! I work for the fed too and used to have those feelings. I am about 4 months sober and while it is hard I get through by doing other things I love to do - snuggle with my cats in bed, watch movies, read. My kids and BF are home too, so that there is a diversion. I may get up the guts to go for a walk in the winter wonderland !

Stay strong! You can do it!


Kari

Ptcapote

Thanks, Sugarbear, just checked and it's still on. Good thing recovering alcoholics are braver than the federal government

Thanks for the reminder though!

0percentABV

One of my last fond drinking memories was during a huge snow storm. Started on a Saturday morning, wife and kids were out of town and I was slated to do a tour at a local brewery and the roads were awful, took me three times as long to get there. And when I got there I came to find out the tour was cancelled. So it was me, a brewer and that was it. I hung out for a couple hours, drank a few beers, some people stopped in and I gave them some samples and sent them on their way. I left taking two cases with me. Got home, shoveled the driveway, drank a beer, shoveled the back deck, drank a beer, raked the roof then drank a bunch of beer. About a six pack later did the same shoveling routine and then got really hammered. Woke up to 18 inches and still snowing. Started all over again, drinking and shoveling, sweating like mad and weaker this time around. Wife called, snowed in at her parents so I was left alone again and repeated the process.

Not sure why I consider it a fond memory. In reality I squandered it because all I really did was drink all weekend. I guess it was a time when I was oblivious to my problem and the crippling hangover I had Monday was just part of the life I knew at the time but I was free to drink how I wanted and maybe the snow surrounding me gave me a sense of seclusion from the outside world and I was free to wallow in beer at my own discretion. Back then "free" days like snow days were green lights to indulge in liquor. Now free days are green lights to do whatever I want. Heck back then they weren't free days at all, those were days I had to feed the beast as some would say and thinking back I recall sitting there, pounding beers and watching TV saying to myself, "I should do something... right after this beer." What a waste of time drinking is.

Ptcapote

Thanks, Kari! I have a couple of greyhounds to cuddle with and I may also venture out into the snow a little later (it finally started actually snowing in southern MD!). But thanks for understanding and posting. Have a good snow day with your kids, BF and kitties too!

Pondlady

We got snow here and schools are closed. My daughter stopped at the grocery yesterday evening and mentioned she noticed how many people were stocking up on beer and wine I'm glad I don't have that worry anymore.

Instead of drinking wine, I'm getting stuff done around the house and going to play around with my camera, taking snow pictures

SSIL75

Snow Day #1 was a toughie for me, too! Very full of memories and instincts.

I've been sober now for 2.5 years and happy to say that I have new 'go to's. Like eating too much, renting a movie with the kids, popcorn and hot chocolate. I anticipate all those now with the same (if not more) excitement than I did a drinking binge. But without the sinking feeling that one days drinking would lead to a morning bender the next day.

Stay warm!

YouRmySunshine

Congrats on staying sober. I too was like you if it were a snow day I didn't have to get the kids off to school, I could stay at home, or play out in the snow with them, with a drink always close by, I had every excuse, to have energy to play in the snow, to stay warm, because it was a free day. It really didn't matter. I cant wait to have my 1st sober snow day & just hang out with them SOBER!

Oh & way cool on the 3 weeks!