Resentful
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Resentful
Whaaaaat happened !!!!!!! ????? I'm so angry resentful I wanna escape and I can't I do everything for everyone and now I can't drink to take a break I'm sitting outside 1hr early waiting for meeting to start I just wanna cry it's all about me looking after everyone !!!!! I wanna break and that's why I drank
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by liss74 
... I wanna break and that's why I drank
Resentments are huge recursors to relapse. Be careful Do what it takes to get rid of resentments. The expecation that you have to do everything is sometimes self-created. Set boundaries for yourself and everyone else to protect your sobriety.
Good luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Originally Posted by doggonecarl
No, you drank because you are an alcoholic. But when we struggle, as you are now, we seek our reasons to justify the drink.
Resentments are huge recursors to relapse. Be careful Do what it takes to get rid of resentments. The expecation that you have to do everything is sometimes self-created. Set boundaries for yourself and everyone else to protect your sobriety.
Good luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Originally Posted by doggonecarl
No, you drank because you are an alcoholic. But when we struggle, as you are now, we seek our reasons to justify the drink.
Resentments are huge recursors to relapse. Be careful Do what it takes to get rid of resentments. The expecation that you have to do everything is sometimes self-created. Set boundaries for yourself and everyone else to protect your sobriety.
Good luck.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,492
Liss, I'm sure you're feeling stressed with having to do the running around with the children. It's really hard to keep a family running smoothly, and often, we as mothers, put ourselves last. I know I did, and it was a big mistake. Try to find a few minutes each day when you can be by yourself and listen to some music or have a relaxing bath. 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Originally Posted by Anna
Liss, I'm sure you're feeling stressed with having to do the running around with the children. It's really hard to keep a family running smoothly, and often, we as mothers, put ourselves last. I know I did, and it was a big mistake. Try to find a few minutes each day when you can be by yourself and listen to some music or have a relaxing bath.
thanks for your reply
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Carl's point is that even if you have to do a lot (and you do have a lot of responsibilities right now), sometimes the overburdened feeling is more a result of our attitudes than reality. You are obviously a strong lady--you are taking care of yourself in spite of everything. It will get better, promise. Not that you will have fewer responsibilities, but that you will be calmer about them and not feeling as sorry for yourself.
Glad you are taking some opportunities to chill out when you can. Drinking may FEEL like a "break" but the consequences add up to more stress than staying sober.
Glad you are taking some opportunities to chill out when you can. Drinking may FEEL like a "break" but the consequences add up to more stress than staying sober.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Originally Posted by LexieCat
Carl's point is that even if you have to do a lot (and you do have a lot of responsibilities right now), sometimes the overburdened feeling is more a result of our attitudes than reality. You are obviously a strong lady--you are taking care of yourself in spite of everything. It will get better, promise. Not that you will have fewer responsibilities, but that you will be calmer about them and not feeling as sorry for yourself.
Glad you are taking some opportunities to chill out when you can. Drinking may FEEL like a "break" but the consequences add up to more stress than staying sober.
Glad you are taking some opportunities to chill out when you can. Drinking may FEEL like a "break" but the consequences add up to more stress than staying sober.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Originally Posted by Dee74
Carl meant no harm.
Maybe in time you'll see what he meant
The truth might **** us off, but it can't harm us Liss.
D
Maybe in time you'll see what he meant
The truth might **** us off, but it can't harm us Liss.
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Originally Posted by liss74
Yeah I do see it and I'm def all about truth so I shall move on and b happy about day 20
I need to try and trust hand my will over to my higher power ! Think I am then reading all this hmmmm not such a long road sorry Carl x
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,031
Originally Posted by liss74
Yes I know I am am alcoholic I'm 100% on that mayb that's why I go to meetings daily and ID and having 5 kids and husband lost his license yes I am driving everywhere so not self created your comments don't help at all
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 2
Hi Liss74,
I hope you will be online again to read this. I understand you completely. I left my depressive-alcholic unemployed ex-doctor husband almost 2 years ago. He suffered a head injury in 2006 and instead of doing everything he could to recover and take care of his family he bacame content to live on disability, drink and complain to everyone who would listen about his poor health. I won't go into all the details, but he was dragging me down (I was drunk most days by 9:00 am) and I knew I had to do something. We have two kids, 9 and 11 now. There was talk of taking our kids away.
I left him and moved in with another man almost 2 years ago, creating the biggest scandal in years in the very conservative southern German town where I live.
Because of the guilt, mostly, I continued to drink. The boys,especially the older one, initially stayed with their father.
But the good news is, I finally woke up. I quit drinking 3 weeks ago on the occasion of lent. Not a drop since Ash Wednesday. I am a self-employed translator and since I stopped drinking I have doubled my workload and thus also my income. I pay large amounts of money to my husband so that he can keep the house (my children would be devastated if we had to sell it) and I have to deal with his absolute hatred of me. I am convinced that he is trying to drink and starve himself to death in order to get the ultimate revenge - make me carry the guilt for his death for the rest of my life. And I will. I already do. But I am going to get through these forty days. And then I'll see what I do after that. I can't say I'll never drink again. Never is such an ominous word. I take it one day at a time.
I hope you will be online again to read this. I understand you completely. I left my depressive-alcholic unemployed ex-doctor husband almost 2 years ago. He suffered a head injury in 2006 and instead of doing everything he could to recover and take care of his family he bacame content to live on disability, drink and complain to everyone who would listen about his poor health. I won't go into all the details, but he was dragging me down (I was drunk most days by 9:00 am) and I knew I had to do something. We have two kids, 9 and 11 now. There was talk of taking our kids away.
I left him and moved in with another man almost 2 years ago, creating the biggest scandal in years in the very conservative southern German town where I live.
Because of the guilt, mostly, I continued to drink. The boys,especially the older one, initially stayed with their father.
But the good news is, I finally woke up. I quit drinking 3 weeks ago on the occasion of lent. Not a drop since Ash Wednesday. I am a self-employed translator and since I stopped drinking I have doubled my workload and thus also my income. I pay large amounts of money to my husband so that he can keep the house (my children would be devastated if we had to sell it) and I have to deal with his absolute hatred of me. I am convinced that he is trying to drink and starve himself to death in order to get the ultimate revenge - make me carry the guilt for his death for the rest of my life. And I will. I already do. But I am going to get through these forty days. And then I'll see what I do after that. I can't say I'll never drink again. Never is such an ominous word. I take it one day at a time.
Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
It's not uncommon for us to go thru a grieving process when we give up the alcohol. We get angry, resentful, sad, little things just **** us off etc. I know I did, as I lost my crutch when I quit. I struggled horribly at the beginning.
You can do this, 20 days is great. It does get easier the longer you stay sober. All you need to do is get thru today. One day at a time.
You can do this, 20 days is great. It does get easier the longer you stay sober. All you need to do is get thru today. One day at a time.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
