avocado

so my friend and I are both going sober and he started about a month after me. The other night I called him to hang out and he said he was going to an AA meeting, so I said I'd tag along because I'm moving next week and it will be the last time I get to see him til probably at least december. It was the first meeting I attended since I'm choosing another route of quitting alcohol.

Anyway, it was a public speaker meeting and the dude started saying something about a 'bus' but he was talking in some kind of metaphorical or symbolic sense in a way, like it was something people should know exactly what he means. He was saying sometimes he's not able to be the driver because it will crash but then other people are driving and at least he's riding on it and he kept talking about this 'bus' he's been on since joining AA. It was rather confusing and when I asked my friend after the meeting he said he was confused by it too. Does this make any sense to anyone? The guy was an entertaining speaker overall but that part was bewildering, but the way he brought it up with no intro made me think it might relate to some concept in AA literature or something. Any ideas?

wpainterw

Sounds like he was trying to say that if he tried to take over and do it for himself or even for other people he'd fail but if he "turned it over" to those who knew better than he he'd be all right. A way of showing his humility and willingness to learn from others. A commendable attitude if not taken to extremes. A way of saying that he needed a "higher power" in order to recover. It's a good thing to be on the bus but unwise to think you can be the only one in control.

W.

avocado

Yeah, that was the gist of what I got from it, but the way he brought it up was like it was a familiar concept. Maybe it is in that particular group or something, as groups of people often devise their own words that become part of the ongoing conversation. Anyway, I really like that style of AA meeting where it's just people speaking. I prefer it to the group circle type meetings I'd been to in the past by court order. It was more interesting to me.

LexieCat

Speaker meetings are great.

Since you enjoyed it and got something out of it, why not try a few more? Besides, anything is better when you are there because you want to be, and not because you are being forced to go.

wpainterw

And nothing prevents you from hanging around a bit afterwards and chatting with some of the folks. It's all voluntary. Stopping drinking is voluntary. It's when you're drinking that things aren't so voluntary. And they get even less voluntary as you go along. Eventually you find you've surrendered everything and then you begin to lose your self as well.

W.

avocado

well, i'm kind of traveling the country starting next week. maybe if i'm somewhere and see a meeting or feel like i need one i'll show up, but being that i'll be traveling around and in various different places i will likely have a lot of other stuff to do than going to meetings. However, I'd never rule it out and I'm sure at some point i'll find myself in one somewhere, sooner or later. I know I'd like to speak to a group at some point, as I love public speaking and feel i have a lot of stories to tell that could help people by sharing.

sugarbear1

I try to thank the speaker for his/her talk and chat with them afterwards. You can always ask for more of an explanation directly from them.

avocado

well, i shook his hand and said 'nice speech' but he was among a lot of old friends as he came in from out of town for his anniversary date, and my friend and i were going to see a band play so we didn't hang around.

LexieCat

Most speakers at AA meetings are just regular members of either the group where they are speaking or some other one, and they are simply sharing their experience, strength and hope. AA groups don't bring in outside speakers, no matter how polished they are. Some AA members do become somewhat known for their shares, and travel around to do it, but it's still as an AA member.

And even the most nervous, hesitant, inarticulate speaker has something of value to listen to if it is from the heart.

YouRmySunshine

Well said Lexie!
The only speakers we have had were in my outpatient treatment.
But I have found the same thing, even ones that lead different lives than I did, so how we all met at the same path at some point, with a desire to quit drinking & stay sober.