Like Clockwork
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 171
Like Clockwork
Well , here iam again , embarassed, tail between the legs ,Weak.
I had 12 days ,then 3 day bender ,then i went 29 days , another 4 day bender ,now back on day 5 ..what did i learn you ask? I learned that it is exactly the same,i kinda knew that already , but the day after stopping i had extreme anxiety that i knew was coming .
2nd day ,is the day your body rejects all food in the nastiest ways possible.
3rd day i get the pins and needles and joint pain ,so bad i cant sleep a hour
4th day ,extreme tiredness and some symptoms of day 3 .
it doesnt matter if you stop for a month,all those symptoms always show up ,I knew they were coming.Its pretty bad when you know what is coming after quitting.
I guess if i was a ultra positive guy ,i could say ,listen you have only drank 8 out of 54 days ,but im not that positive.
drinking doesnt have the shine and luster that it used to have,even when you are gunned on a friday nite it seemed stupid and a waste of time ..i drank in the morning of those 4 days because i could feel the anxiety coming on.
I didnt meditate ,make any money,do anything positive in those 4 days , i also predictably couldnt moderate, it was a bottle of Vodka /Rye a nite with beer chasers..$140 for a 4 day stupidfest.
What am i gonna do differently ? im going to stick with my current plan, I couldnt stand the pains and lack of sleep and unproductive life ..after each quit i hate alcohol even more and more.
everybody was right ,i shouldve thrown that gift bottle out or given it away to somebody that can moderate.
i wasnt going to post here again till i got my 30 in again, but i was reading and thought what the heck ..its like that Rocky quote ...Its not how hard you can hit but how hard you can keep getting hit and moving forward, thats how living is done .
or something like that : >
but im here again ,do i get my knuckles rapped or have to stand in a corner ?
I had 12 days ,then 3 day bender ,then i went 29 days , another 4 day bender ,now back on day 5 ..what did i learn you ask? I learned that it is exactly the same,i kinda knew that already , but the day after stopping i had extreme anxiety that i knew was coming .
2nd day ,is the day your body rejects all food in the nastiest ways possible.
3rd day i get the pins and needles and joint pain ,so bad i cant sleep a hour
4th day ,extreme tiredness and some symptoms of day 3 .
it doesnt matter if you stop for a month,all those symptoms always show up ,I knew they were coming.Its pretty bad when you know what is coming after quitting.
I guess if i was a ultra positive guy ,i could say ,listen you have only drank 8 out of 54 days ,but im not that positive.
drinking doesnt have the shine and luster that it used to have,even when you are gunned on a friday nite it seemed stupid and a waste of time ..i drank in the morning of those 4 days because i could feel the anxiety coming on.
I didnt meditate ,make any money,do anything positive in those 4 days , i also predictably couldnt moderate, it was a bottle of Vodka /Rye a nite with beer chasers..$140 for a 4 day stupidfest.
What am i gonna do differently ? im going to stick with my current plan, I couldnt stand the pains and lack of sleep and unproductive life ..after each quit i hate alcohol even more and more.
everybody was right ,i shouldve thrown that gift bottle out or given it away to somebody that can moderate.
i wasnt going to post here again till i got my 30 in again, but i was reading and thought what the heck ..its like that Rocky quote ...Its not how hard you can hit but how hard you can keep getting hit and moving forward, thats how living is done .
or something like that : >
but im here again ,do i get my knuckles rapped or have to stand in a corner ?
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,524
No rapped knuckles - just a hug. Proud of you for coming back and being honest about what happened. We're glad you're back. You never have to put yourself through that misery again, junk. 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Originally Posted by junk33
but im here again ,do i get my knuckles rapped or have to stand in a corner ?
For me it just became about pushing through...completely...to the other side.
Glad you're back. Hopefully you've gotten the final answer on the alcohol question.
xo
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 3,062
Thank you for your honesty and your experience. I'm not liking how I'm feeling struggling with wanting to drink and your post is making me feel better for staying home on my couch checking out this website!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,366
welcome back Junk - I dunno but if you're like me you can beat yourself up better than any of us ever could.
My advice is forget about the sackcloth and ashes and get start back into making plans to stay sober for good, Junk
My advice is forget about the sackcloth and ashes and get start back into making plans to stay sober for good, Junk
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