Why the rush?
 

Hi all- Just thinking about a meeting I attended last week and someone said that she just wasn't feeling as good as she thought she should be feeling 5 months sober.

I said in my infinite wisdom (hahaha) 7 months sober I did not get to be a disaster overnight it took a lot of time, effort, planning and down right hard work to get to be the big mess I was.

So it is going to take some time to feel better, physically and mentally. I am trying to slow down, not rush it have patience and know that I am healing . Every day may not be perfect.. but even on my worst ones they are a 100 times better than before:)

Thoughts?

I like the idea of slowing down. With kids and work I feel like I am always rushing somewhere. I need to appreciate the moments of peace at the end of the day, calming my brain during yoga, and appreciating the little things I see on a walk.

I think your advice was perfect, :)

You have a great attitude Sophie! It took a long time to get here, and it probably won't take anywhere near as long to feel better and get healthier. Slowing down feels really good after the chaotic drinking life.

It is a disappointment to realize that sobriety and all it promises is much more than not drinking. When I first heard that in the rooms I thought it was BS, but it is true. Drinking was a major problem for me, but it was as much symtom as disease.

I had to try really hard to let go of expectations and remember that recovery is not about a destination - its really is about the journey...thats where all the good stuff happens :)

D

I like Delilah's thought calm your brain... Which is hard for me to do . Peace and calm are my watch words now. Just take a few breathes. And trying to appreciate the little things I missed. Also taking things as they come and dealing with them at that point.

In my drinking days I had so much anxiety and the what if's ?? So I would just drink more trying to rid myself of that feeling which of course did the opposite . Drink more, more anxiety , more anxiety, more drinks. Craziness and insanity is what that was!!

Sophie,
i found myself having those "i should be feeling...by now i should surely..." ideas too, and i don't really know where they came from. where would i get this weird time-line from in my head about how i (or others?) "should" be at certain points?
made me laugh, eventually, after i looked at it for a while. so much of this journey into sobriety is individual, even though we share a lot in common.
person A may well be at a point at one year that i haven't come close to in my several, and maybe will never even visit.
"what's the rush" is a good and useful question, i find.
letting go (oh how i dislike this new-agey lingo, but oh how well it fits at times) of the preconceived notions of how things should be at certain points in time, or of some kind of set end-result that we will reach that will be some kind of perfection(and then what? stop??) used to seem like a cop-out to me (upbringing), but luckily i've mostly managed to remember and accept how ludicrous that is.
no, no rush. and no perfect end-goal to get to in this non-rush.

That's very insightful. I appreciate a new perspective.

Neighbor (I just noticed your location) :)

I concur Fini:) BCS yes Colorful Colorado Luv it. I am a native.

I like the idea of slowing down. Success isn't a race. It's only something you can appreciate in retrospect. There's no finish line.. but there's a lot of pitfalls along the way. Keep a straight line to your goal and let each day, week, month be a milestone, and not a wall to climb!