My reason
 

I haven't spoken to my biological mom in decades; when I speak of mom I'm talking about my adopted mom. It's not really important but if you've read my story in that section here on SR, this won't make a lot of sense without that lil tidbit.

I talked to my mom almost everyday. I visited her on February 10th. I offered to pick up my sister and take her for the visit with me. She said 'yes' but when the time came she wouldn't answer the phone because she was too busy using. When I visited mom we had a great visit with lots of laughter and affection. We finished up with a hug, kiss and exchanged "I love you's". A couple of hours later, she had a massive coronary and died.

If you're looking for benefits to stay clean and/or sober here's mine: I got to be present to have a wonderful relationship with this woman who gave me so much and say good-bye to her without a single regret.

I am sorry for your loss. Your post is a excellent example of both the beauty and fragility of this life we have.

I'm sorry for your loss Legna - but I'm glad you had that last little time together.
best wishes to you and your family,

D

Thank you both for the sentiments - truly...but ya know...

I got to meet my hero once. It was pretty exciting and, contrary to Allen Carr's warning, I left it with no regrets. We had a great visit and when the time came for him to leave, we said our good-byes and I had a cherished memory which has only grown over time. Likewise with mom. We had a great visit that lasted over decades. It was time for her to leave but I can't imagine being anything other than grateful for the time I got to share with her. There is no loss in winning the lottery of $10 million cause it wasn't $100 million and there is no loss because I didn't get another day with her... what I got was enough to enrich my life beyond that which I did anything to deserve.

hugs and love to all of you... and all your loved ones too!

Freedom...
free to lovingly let her go with no regrets. So beautiful and thank you for sharing.

All at once I feel weirdly sad for your sister. She has missed the opportunities and now the time for "do-overs" has passed.

Wow. Sorry for your loss, but marvel in your acceptance and sense of peace.
Thank you for sharing.