Conor

I'm off the drink since Ash Wednesday (3 days ago) as I thought Lent would be a good challenge for me.

I'm awfully grumpy, though. And irrational. I make a big deal out of nothing and I'm devoid of any sense of calm, of contentment, of peace. All of this formerly came about when I was in the process of obliterating my senses at home on my own. Home from work ==> drink ==> bed. Every day - wow, the magnitude of my monotonous addiction is still dawning on me as I write.

For now, though, how can I be a kinder person during this period? Somebody who loves me needs me to be there for her, and she deserves better than this.

Would any more experienced people have insight or advice? Thanks a million.

Hevyn

Conor - Welcome to SR!

What you're feeling is perfectly normal. I had a horrible personality the first couple of weeks after I quit. My emotions were all over the place. I was very sorry for myself. Everything got better, though! Each day I felt a little more human and hopeful. Joy and happiness will be part of your life again. Be patient with yourself as you heal. You sound like a very good person who is going through a huge change - you will get there.

Dee74

A gratitude list can really help.

Think about the things you should be grateful and thankful for. Write them down.

The irritability is common - our minds and bodies have been through a lot and are repairing...it will pass

welcome to SR

D

Sazzle

The grumpiness only lasted a couple of weeks for me too. Hang in there.

Ironically, I gave up sugar for lent so I'm going through the grumps for a second time. But I couldn't have got through early sobriety without chocolate to replace the sugar I was missing from alcohol. If you're not having sugar then I prescribe chocolate to help fill the gap temporarily until you are used to the lack of alcohol sugars.

Quitting for 45 days is a great start. Are you planning on continuing?

S x

hypochondriac

Welcome to SR Conor I was the same, though the extreme grumpiness only seemed to last a few weeks. Hang in there. Maybe make sure you have time to yourself, and this other person. I hope this doesn't sound callous but maybe it will be easier to be nice when it's for a limited period. Allow yourself the time to be grumpy too, it's part of the process x

kizzy40

If you know it's irrational thats a start
When you feel the pressure start to build stop, count to 10 in your head slowly.
Maybe get out if you can, a minute or two in the garden.
If you are doing this for lent then spend an evening or two in church, you may find the peace to restore your equalibrium there.
Or with the money you have saved treat your lady to bowling or the cinema to break the week up a little.
Hope this helps, i'm sure you will be fine

Louise82

Conor, I'm also in early sobriety and currently pretty grumpy myself so I'll leave it to others to continue to offer their insights but I just wanted to say to SR!

Amelia99

Hi, Conor, and welcome. I'm pretty new too, in week four. In those first couple of weeks I had to make it a priority to be really be gentle with myself and care for myself. I gave myself little treats, like chocolates or ordered in pizza and watched a movie. I figured it was a rough time and a time to be nice to myself. I think I needed a little of that before I was ready to be the nice person I wanted to be to everyone else in my life. I did limit my time with others to shorter periods like Hypochondriac recommended and it helped tremendously. It didn't take too long to pass and in the end I was able to be much kinder to others than if I'd really pushed myself to the limit.

Hope that helps and good luck!

jazzfish

The two things I do are: 1) meditate, even for as little as a couple of minutes can help and 2) vigorous exercise, again just a few minutes to disperse some of that pent up energy. Watch the caffeine intake and don't get too hungry.