TexasAngel88

Hi. I was a big time SR girl back in the day (2004-2006)...but on the friends and family section. Well lo and behold, it looks like I need to be on this side now. Woohoo... :| Haha. I created a new log on because for whatever goofy reason, I don't want any of those old F&F friends to remember me. Perfect sense right?? SR was a big part of my separation, divorce, and eventual move on, so it was natural to come back.

For my question....I'm working on day 7 for my first ever attempt at this. The quitting wasn't so scary or hard, but I think the hard is just starting.

So....a party-type girlfriend invited me to an event tomorrow. It was my impression that a group was going, but I've found out I'm her drinking date and only one going. The quote was, let's get there early so we can booze! It's ticketed, so I can't stick her with the ticket/expense... Any tips on handling this?

Coldfusion

Welcome back, T A!

I expect the advice you'll get the most is, "Don't go." But apparently you don't want that option.

So then go and don't drink. If the beverage never touches your lips, you can't possibly swallow.

TexasAngel88

I'm over thinking it. I am betting she wants to go with a fun party girl, not a boring, day 8 girl. Maybe I should cancel and not worry about how she'll react.

Thanks for the welcome back! Wish it wasn't on these terms, but at least I knew where to go.

TexasAngel88

I guess the bigger question isn't specific to this event, but probably handling the "huh, you're not partying??" that's sure to ensue...from all directions...

Dee74

Welcome back TexasAngel

For years I put things like 'not disappointing my friends' ahead of my own welfare. Mad, really.

I wouldn't go - but I wouldn't stick her with the expense either - if you can't transfer it, cam you pay her for the ticket?

D

sugarbear1

You can be designated driver!

Received

I would make sure to reimburse for the ticket and not go. To me, that is a far greater result. Don't go + not drinking = Sober.

Going + not sure about drinking = ?

bigsombrero

I agree with Dee above. The answer to your question is easy - don't go. Your alcoholic brain is twisting your thinking - "I have to go because she paid for a ticket" is not really an excuse, right? If it were a ball game, you'd just give her the money and say sorry something came up. Also, what kind of event is this that someone is buying tickets to and saying "let's booze early"? Sounds to me like one of those all-u-can-drink special deals that you pay at the door and get unlimited beverages. If that's the case, if you value your sobriety, don't even think about it. Even if it's not, there is no way anyone serious about quitting drinking should attend anything like this.

It's hard I know, but this is just one night. It gets better, as they say. The above thoughts are just my opinions based on experience. I'm over 7 months sober and still won't even meet good friends at a bar for an hour. I just stay away from that stuff, and I think you should too - at least for now.

Good luck!

AlisonW

Hi Texasangel! Just wanted to say hi and let you know this is the same for me... used to post on the friends and family board and surprise, surprise, here I am for myself!! I was under a different name back then too, but I only changed because i couldn't remember my old password!
Like everyone else, I'm in the "don't go" column. I'd tend to think it's just too soon to be put in a situation where you will be tempted. Give yourself some time. There will be other events to attend, and if this person is really a friend, other events with her. Put yourself first.
Anyway, welcome(back!)

-Alison