christyham

Hi I am new to the site. Had to do something after yet another night of excessive drinking I'm memory blank. I might not drink for another 4 months but when I do the same thing will happen again. Once I get past 4 or 5 drinks I just want more and as fast as I can drink it. Anyone else have this problem?

Ghostlight

I HAD that problem before I quit drinking. One was too many and twenty wasn't enough.
I would drink all I could for days. Stop. Repeat. I went through this for years.
Save yourself the misery I went through for twenty years and stop now.

You'll find a lot of support here, and best to you.

soberclover

I can relate! That is why I stopped drinking. That is wonderful that you are able to put together a stretch of time without drinking! I find that support, such as this website, is essential for me. I get support as well as reminders when reading other people's posts why I do not want to continue drinking. I've learned that my drinking only gets worse; not better as I'm an alcoholic.

Impurrfect

Welcome to SR!!

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Nonsensical

Just about everyone here has this problem, that's why we're here!

Welcome!

janiebluebird

Binge drinking is my problem as well. It is easy for me to try to convince myself that I'm not an alcoholic because I don't drink daily, or early in the morning. But I am. Its not okay to drink myself to stupidity and act accordingly. Acceptance is the first step because as long as you are on the fence about it, you'll find excuses. Or you'll think that maybe you can moderate it. I actually did about half the time - usually if the people I was with weren't going to continue drinking. Given the chance, though, I'd drink all night. Alcohol beats me every time. I have no choice but to leave it out of my life.

opgirl

I will stay sober Monday through Friday but then Friday night usually starts a binge that sometimes lasts until Sunday. It's ridiculous but every weekend I say...I'll just have a couple. Honestly I can't even have one. If I don't have one then I won't binge... Good luck! We can do it!

Kat60

Welcome Christy!

christyham

Thanks guys good to know its not just me. It's going to be hard but today's the start of a new me.

melissa6381

I once heard, "alcoholism isn't about how often you drink but what happens when you do" which first helped me to accept my addiction. Secondly I just read the book "under the influence" and they stress throughout the book that, "Addiction to alcohol is primarily physiological. Alcoholics become addicted because their bodies are physiologically incapable of processing alcohol normally”
Unfortunately, I think we were just born this way.

Dee74

Welcome christyham

I was a binge drinker for many years. I never left 4 months between drinks, but everything else is very familiar to me

glad to have you here

D

jkb

I was a binge drinker too. Never 4 months usually 7-10 days in between. Every hangover was worse than the last. Glad you are here.

christyham

Thanks guys. It just depends what's on I'm not a big social person like to stay in but when it comes to a social gathering with drink involved it always ends messy. Should it be a family wedding or a birthday etc etc. I had a stag party on sat night and promised myself and my wife I would behave but when I'm out and I think I'm in control and ok it's like flicking a switch one moment I'm there next im wakening up wondering what happened and then depression kicks in. I feel so down tonight

melissa6381

Christy I am also feeling down because of my sloppy relapse on Friday night. One minute I was having fun at a party and the next I woke up on a random couch having to face my embarrassing bad behavior from the night before. I have just been laying around for the past two days- trying to wait for time to heal me. Remember- this too shall pass.

janiebluebird

Thats exactly how it is for me, too, christy. I feel totally in control and OK and then the next thing I know I'm waking up in the next morning with that "uh oh" feeling. It has happened again and again, I've got enough evidence to know I'm truly not behind the wheel after I start drinking, even if I FEEL stable at first...or during the deceitful nights when I manage to behave.

christyham

Thanks Mellisa that just describes what I have done. 2 days of trying to recover wondering what I done or who I offended. Going to be another long night where can't sleep.

melissa6381

Try downloading a mindless game on your phone or computer to give yourself a little break from the anxious thinking. I feel like everything is easier to process a few days out so just let yourself recover and deal with the emotions of it when you're in a better place. Now taking my own advice is the hard part but that's what I keep reminding myself

Hevyn

Hi christy. We're so glad you're here.

Like the others, for me one drink usually led to 10. That's why I had no choice but to stop all together. I tried for many years to manage it and use willpower to control the amounts - but nothing worked. My determination to have 'just a few' always led to an unpredictable ending and sometimes danger. It's good you're thinking about what alcohol is doing to your life.

peanuts7

this is exactly me, but every time i do drink, i go further and further. i ended up in hospital last time 2 weeks ago as my friends thought i was dead, so im not drinking anymore. its not a healthy way to go, simple as. when im drinking i am aware of the exact moment i decide to hit self destruct, i recognise it and i deliberately go full throttle at it. i have had an addiction to codeine before because of this mentality and ended up with a liver infection and a problem with my eyesight because of it.

is something wrong in your life? ive got severe depression which im on medication for and one stressful or upsetting event will still turn me against myself and ill go get high/drunk to get a release from it, and deliberately go too far. its almost as if im taking my frustration at others out on myself.

ive recognised i need to find healthier ways to deal with problems instead of trying to escape from them, because theyll still be there the next day if i drink anyway - usually with more problems attached to them because of something ive said/done that im unaware of!

obviously this is just my experience but hopefully you are able to take something from it.

christyham

Hi thanks for sharing. I really don't know why I do it I have a great wife to kids and a good job I'm not rich but can pay bills with some left over. I am sporty and play rugby and have recently started to jog with the hope of doing a marathon. So having said all this u think I should be happy which I am!! But when I go out and drink involved I just go off the rails. There's us history in the family of drink and my uncle was an alcoholic but give up 15 years ago. I do think this is a problem in my genes and that I just can't handle the stuff. I am normally quiet and reserved but with drink I am a totally different person. I have 3 brothers who I am very close to and to be honest they have a similar problem. Although they don't get into the depression and downer that I have after drink. This has been the worst yet it's hard to hide it from my family and work. I just have no interest in life this week and would love to just lock myself away and hide from the world.