Anna

Ntmu, neither AA nor any of us here can make you stop. You need to make that choice yourself and then take action. Yes, it's hard to do, but you need to get rid of the alcohol that you have and don't buy anymore. You can do this!

ntmu

i'm not going out, the weather is really bad. this s*cks. i wish i had the AA connections by now, but i don't. daaaaay, after daaaaaaay, i get angry & i will, add it up; haven't thought of that song since 20 years:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NCV2vmQT_4

probs won't hear it again for long time.

i'm random.

Maples

This is why I gave up on quitting alone. I need other sober alcoholics who understand powerlessness over the drug. I needed advice from people who understand how I got here.

If you want to read my story of rock bottom and giving up and just getting to that meeting in the mess of a state I was in:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...g-nervous.html

I bet you can relate...

ntmu

i emailed my mentor, his helpful words help set me off last night. i had to tell him to chill because it's intense to hear from him, because he's like an old hero from when he was drinking & now i chose him because he's overcome a ton, but hearing from him last night was too soon. he's like famous & stuff, still.

ntmu

i wish i had it documented, my rock bottoms. this is not rock bottom for me. i'm not going there.

here's a nice song by an ex alchy:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVwamE7t_YQ

props

ntmu

i need a woman for sakes, let's get this over with.

ntmu

my parents were supposed to be coming on Fri or Sat, now it's Sun or Mon or next week, i was trying to draw out this whole process so i could have a few beers on my birthday dinner and be done with it. this weather screw up my plan, no one's fault, but i'm still waiting to hear back from them to see what the f*ning plan is. please i was ready to quit, but i want to get this done with. i have bad relationship with my parents and may always, but i need them to come have my bday dinner and get this done with already.

bigsombrero

I would say just step back and take a deep breath here. Maybe take a nap? If you're already buzzed or drunk the decisions you make right now might not be the answer and your feelings might not be in the right place. Turn on a college hoops game, make a cup of tea and sleep on the couch for a few hours. When you wake up have a cup of coffee and start sorting things out then. Just my thoughts!

artsoul

I agree with bigsombrero....... get yourself some tea/water/juice and turn on the TV, or get some sleep. Not much you can do right now with the weather and all, so just focus on sobering up. Keep putting off that next drink, one minute at a time.

The sooner you stop, the sooner you'll feel better.

ntmu

big S always knows, but you guys forget the day once you start early like this it hurts for the the whole day. we'll see.

my friend told me something like, if i can't be mad at alcohol, be mad at all the problems it's caused me. not what i expected from a poet. but yes i didn't quote or interpret that right.

ntmu

i'm glad everyone get's to see the filth & disgust of a real alchy online. thanks,

SophieB

Ntmu.. Yes stop ! Call the hotline. I did this on my last binge of drinking. Almost three days straight. I was sooooo sick after. Deaths door. Don't let it get that far. Their are people who would love to help. You just have to seek them out.

You can do this!!!

Pamel

It is kind of a strange reaction, but if you are honest, at a meeting, EVEN about being drunk, it is sort of a gift to everyone there: 1/2 of the people in solid recovery, 1/4 afraid to speak, and another 1/4 on the fence.

You will be the MOST IMPORTANT PERSON there. Be honest. Talk about your problem. Believe me when I say that none of us is there for the coffee...

Xune

Most of us still are real addicts or alchies as you call us.

The only difference is that some of us are in active recovery.

Addiction is a great equalizer and recovery is just as real.

ntmu

i'm a romantic.

bigsombrero

Don't beat yourself up. Take a walk - it's just a little snow. Bring your camera, it's a unique scene out there with the weather. It's just something to "DO", nothing more nothing less. Find something else to occupy your brain other than self-pity and alcohol. The last time I got wasted like that I was texting friends about how "I'm not going to be around much longer" and all that stuff. Oh the drama I played out in my drunk mind. It was all a big mess. Avoid the mess, sober up, watch a ball game and chill out! You can work on the next steps once you get to a sober frame of mind.

If the situation is critical, call the hotline or doctor.

ntmu

there are other meetings later tonight, but that is MANY hours away, i can't imagine where i'll be at at that point. & this would not require driving, but it would require a lot that noncity folk understand.

ntmu

i'll PM you about that bgsmbro

Hope4Life

PLEASE DO NOT go out into the snow while you are intoxicated!!

Drink some water and take a long nap. You have to be tired from staying awake all night and that will make a logical thought process nearly impossible.

Dump any beer you have left down the drain, wrap yourself in a warm blanket and make yourself comfortable.

ntmu

i live in city. i do not drive. no worries there. anyway,

i know i have PMs, i can't respond to anyone other than saying it's painful to get through today without for the rest of the day, so i will leave this forum for a while, sorry.