I am here at my sponsors house and I am safe and sober. He has 2 kids, 13 year old daughter and 15 year old son. I was horrified to meet them and look them in the face and tell them why I was here. His son approached me in the kitchen. I told him I am an alcoholic and your Dad is trying to save me from myself. He asked me for how long have a I been recovered. Less than 24 hours I admitted. I told him I was scared to be here because of having to admit this to him and his sister. He told me he understands, but he is glad I am here. Can you believe this? I cannot, but that 15 year old kid gave me a big dose of hope. Absolutely amazing people. I feel so blessed that I stumbled into that AA meeting, met my sponsor and he took me in. I have my big book, and I now feel they have given me a support framework. What I do with these gifts is up to me.

15 years old and I'm sure wise beyond his years. He seems to see your potential, he cares, he's glad you are there but mostly he understands.

I'm so glad you are there with your sponsor and his family.

Best to you...:c011:

He understands because both his parents were using and quit when he was 5. His Dad talks to him about it. His Dad told me a story tonight of his son coming down the stairs and peaking around the corner to see which Dad he would get. Terrible thought but this "kid" knows more about this disease than I do.

thats really great moment Maples.
How awesome for you - I'm so glad you're with good people :)

D

Day 3 today. Thanks all for the kind words.

I got up and my sponsor picked me up. We went to the tinknockers meeting and found it cancelled. The property was still in the process of being digged out of the snow. Went to another one he knew, cancelled also. Got breakfast together at a local diner, then went to a 3rd meeting and got there in time for the 2nd half.

I saw a presentation of a 1 year token to a member from his sponsor. He told his tale after the sponsor sat down, and then told his story of the weekend. He is a building manager for a bunch of apartments. The building lost power due to the storm. He brought a generator over and was able to get his ground floor apartment up and running with heat. He invited everyone in the building down to his unit, and went out and picked up 3 party size pizzas. Some of the people that showed up were users not interested in recovery and he was in full awarement of it, but he didn't turn them away. The kids in the building loved it like it was an adventure. It made him happy and feel blessed to have the power to do this now.

He then talked about what he would have done during the storm if he was still using and drinking, and how much he would have missed out on.

It was pretty special. I walked up to him after the meeting and introduced myself, and then thanked him for sharing that story - it hit home for me.

After the meeting my sponsor and I discussed the coming week(s). He stressed the need to make my personal-time after work available for working on my recovery. We discussed why 90 in 90 is important, but he can understand if my life situation makes that difficult - the importance to him is to work on this daily and be honest with him. He is setting me towards step 1 and I will be calling him tonight to get some direction on what he wants me to write down.

I called my non-A GF and discussed this with her. She is in full support, but I felt we should put our relationship on hold until I have this under control. It was a painful discussion, I think she was somewhat unhappy with me. The reality is that for the next week I foresee every hour (except today) being dedicated to work, sleep or recovery. I bet next week looks like this too.

Today I am going grocery shopping. Making spinach and mushroom lasagna, doing laundry, cleaning the apt from floor to ceiling and then calling my sponsor. Waking up in a clean apt when you are sober really makes you feel like you are getting better, because when I was drinking heavily the place was a sty and I was embarrassed for myself. It fed the self loathing...

Good going Mapes!

Your sponsor will be very helpful to your recovery, and I think you made the right choice with your girlfriend.

Thanks CF, it was a hard decision but me giving her a matter of hours per week of my time and calling it a relationship seemed like a stretch. We're hitting pause and might pick up in a few months if I can report success.

Maples I am so happy for you.

Just remember that his Dad is one of 'them' or 'one of us'.
And he loves his Dad very much by the sounds of it.

I would stick as close to them as possible. They sound just what you need.

so happy to hear you weathered the storm with the help of a great family and sponsor. Keep focusing on what you need! Be well Maples

The addictive voice has much in common with an abusive partner... by turns abusive, charming, and apologetic.

Been awhile. I made it 28 days sober and then relapsed. Bad. 6 days of non stop drunken misery. 3/16 to 3/21. On Friday, 3/22 got a knock on my door at 8:30 am. Was my friend, "good, you aren't dead." He says. "Pack a bag, we're leaving."

We go to his house and spend 3 hours calling rehab/detox facilities. Find one with an open bed, takes my insurance, we'll be there by 4:30pm. Call my boss, admit my alcoholism, now he understands where I was all week. Phone has been off since Tue. Clinic says earliest release for me is Wed 3/27. Shite, 3 more days out of work. I am panicking at this point, maybe this is a bad idea. The excuse machine in my brain goes haywire...

My friend is buying none of it. "Give me your keys, I'll drive your truck to my place. Work can **** off for 5 days, you are staying here." I call my sponsor, he isn't buying my BS excuses either. "Do it and call me when you get out."

I got out yesterday. Clean, sober, social worker set me up with IOP therapy, attended the first session tonight. Oh yeah, met with company HR and told her I was an alcoholic this morning. Also, my sister had a baby last week but I missed it.

What a friggin week and a half.

Going to bed, day 7 complete. My life feels like a daytime soap lately.

PS, monitored detox was the best thing I have done besides join AA.

good to see you back Maples - glad you're ok.

D

No matter how it feels, just keep following the TV script. I remember one of the first things I shared at an AA meeting (four months ago) was that the 12 steps seemed weird to me. But I kept following the script, doing things that people told me would work. I am now starting my step four with my sponsor...

It's great to hear from you, Mapes! It sounds like you have some really good friends.

Glad you are back Maples.

Stick around...

Maples - So good to hear from you. It sounds like you're ready for your new life to begin. Proud of you for getting yourself back on track.

Hey there! hope all is well, we all missed you. I am glad so see you back. It has been tough but it will get better. This is progress. big hugs!!!:You_Rock_