the indomitable alcoholic mind
 

Three and a half months sober. I am watching the news. My ears perk up when I hear that liquor can now be sold on Sunday. My first thought was Sunday, really? Then I thought now that I have quit drinking we can buy booze on Sunday. Like I am missing out on the convienence of not having to stock up Saturday night.
I do not want to go back to drinking, but only an alcoholic would think this way.

You ought to be down here (Mobile AL), where the city is in full on Mardi Gras mode, and the bars are open 24/7. This is a terrible place to get sober.

When I first quit drinking. I would go shopping on Sunday because I knew I would be "safe". Timing is everything. Good thing I quit when I did. No more safe Sundays here in Indiana

I still notice when booze and beer is on sale. Guess I still am an alcoholic

It is hard to believe that something so destructive still has a place in our everyday thinking. I am really mad at myself because my first thoughts were like 'This is good news" I am such a drunk you know?

or how about when they come up with a new flavour of vodka that you wanna try and think geez why didnt they have that when i was drinking

I am in awe of alcoholism
My thoughts scare me. First I think how cool booze on Sunday. Then I think it's not cool for me. Followed by remorse. I am alienated to myself.

Escapist... I think you may benefit from some simple SMART approaches regarding, what they call, Encyclopedia of Rational Coping Statements and Disputations. Here is a link...

SMART link

It take some practice but you just demonstrated the point in your last post. You saw the messages you went through. I do the same thing. Now I try to catch words or phrases that put me in a vulnerable spot. I try to replace them with the counter thought that helps me see things better or gain strength.

You may not like the idea... But thought of it as I read your thread.

:)

Ken

You are definitely not alone in this. I think things like "Oh, Super Bowl will be a great drink fest because our team isn't in it this year so no one will care about the game" and then remember I don't drink. Or, old drinking buddy is geting married, used to be one of my favorite people to drink with. I think "yay, time to celebrate" and then remember I don't drink. Even though it's been over 6 months I still think like a drinker (and probably always will).

There are no "safe" days here in the town of Lost Angels. And if I had gone through my stash on Saturday night, I knew what time all of the local liqour stores and grocery stores opened on Sunday morning.

And I also still notice in the grocery store mailers when liqour is on sale and I think "Oh wow, that's a really good deal...Oh Well!"