Day116, and had some wine
 

Yeah, guess it was the entitlement, or a little too self assured. It wasn't an escape. It may have been resentments. I don't know, but I had some wine and nothing bad or good happened. No catastrophe, no jail, fights or embarrassing moments. That in itself is enough warning for me-- I am not ready to bet on another attempt. I drank again, i dodnt get drunk.i had 3 glasses and threw the rest out. I didn't hve to have more. I didn't drink the next morning. nothing happened, I know I don't need it in my life. It's obviously outside of the parameters of my recovery group, but I still have to be honest. I Valle my sponsor after rather than before. I know what I did wrong, and pray that the next time I have this false sense of courage and confidence, I will do the next right thing. Cunning baffling and powerful. It can sneak up at any time. Pay close attention!

It's ok falling, I had a glass christmas eve, it did nothing for me but break me out in hives. It is a very good sign that you were able to get rid of the rest. I wouldn't consider that a relapse unless it continues, at least I didn't. I think the fact that we know we don't wanna drink speaks volumes. Good luck!

These posts always scare me. I am over 100 days. I am still physically recovering from drinking. I just don't want to go back. I don't know how you guys can drink and then not drink. I have never been able to stop. I read these posts I think what if I think I can handle drinking. I really can't.

Your doing the right thing, never give in to it, there is nothing to go back to just a load of bs hangovers and obsession.
Drinking is drinking , I really do not see it any other way.

Stay sober , if I can do it anyone can :)

Sometimes we need things like this to happen to us. I needed several relapses before I realised what I needed to do and how I needed to do it. Don't beat yourself up about it too much. Figure out why it happened. Write about your emotions leading upto, during, and after you had your drink and then move on. There's no use in dwelling on it. It's counterproductive.

Natom.

Lol thanks! I'm not beating myself up. For a brief moment I entertained the idea of moderation. Then I shot it down. Honestly, I don't feel bad about it, and u don't know if the people in my group are going to like tht. I'm prepared to get the "talk" from most of them. And that makes me feel funky. Whatever, I've been sober 118 of the last 119 days. That's what makes me happy!

Sounds like you have a good attitude!! Good luck!

glad you're back ft :)
have you got a plan in place for if this happens again?

D

You are right you have 118/119 days. I do not see any sense in beating yourself up, or allowing anyone to make you feel bad.

I'm coming up on around 120 days give or take, and the ol' AV is whispering to me occasionally, too. I'm still just ignoring it though; experience has shown me that I can't drink a little, just a lot.

This is what happened to me. I didn't make it close to 100 days, but after about 50 days my craving sniped me one Saturday afternoon back in September. I remember it well. When I bought the wine, I knew the whole time I wasn't doing a good thing, at all. I drank it and it was like liquid heaven in my mouth. Boom, just like that, right back in to my old ways and just barely getting back to quitting again. This is what I will think about if I get sniped again. Thanks for the post and the warning, it's definitely needed.

Thanks for the support. I know what went wrong and I am a fool to believe it wasn't to escape anything. Lets get real. I wanted to escape alot of things, including being an alcoholic. Just to prove that I could do it again. I am at so much more peace today than I was even 2 weeks ago. Watch yourself, and pay close attention. Even though nothing bad happened, THIS TIME, doesn't mean the next time will have the same results. Seriously, the calmness I feel since that night is unremarkable.

thank you for that reminder :)

I thank you as well. My Quit date is very close to yours...last drink on October 9th, first sober day October 10th. Duly noted.

Ugh, I am scared now too. I'm 97 days today and it's coming close to the longest I ever had. I'm getting that feeling, too, of "I got this" - but I want to stay scared and lost so I'm scared to even think about trying it again. God, I've relapsed and lied so many times it's sick...I gotta stay on top of my game this time! Thank you for the post - I like reality sometimes. I just know I wouldn't have been able to stop at that. good for you that you were

I have found I get kinda squirrelly around milestones, so I am not going to recognize sober time In meetings. If someone asks me today how I am doing with not drinking, I'm going to include my entire amount of sobriety, and just say I've got around 4 months. Because the fact of the matter is I do. I know in aa they look at it like we lost our sober time. Well we each work out program differently. And I didn't lose my sober time. I have had a couple drinks in 4 months time. And that is a victory in itself!

what a great thread,, i too had a wee slip up,, and before i relasped i wouldnt get back on my horse , so to me this slip was a mere rminder, not too bad. i learnt from it and sure sounds like you guys have too, and thats fabalicious innit???
keep being strong, we are all just fab xx
lv cleo xxxxxx

Me, too, falling..... I always say out of 24 months ( actually to the day, now that I just posted that) I have 21 months sober.... 18 of which are consecutive. This is a more positive mindset for me, personally. I don't agree that you lost your sober time. It's awesome to have consecutive days, weeks, and months because that accumulation makes us stronger I think. But IMHO, any single day anyone stays sober is an accomplishment.

When I've gotten a few days sober and drank without consequences, it was license to do it again....and maybe again and then another again.....then the old pattern of nightly drinking took over.

I'd start day one now and keep moving forward with consecutive days of sobriety! In fact, that IS what I did this last time I drank and stopped.....coming up on 21 months of consecutive days of staying stopped now. This feels awesome!

Congrats on starting again!

I agree that you didn't lose all your sober time. 3 glasses of wine doesn't destroy all that hard work your put into those months.

Keep moving forward. You were lucky nothing bad happened this time, and just take it for what it is.

:)