renaldo

I went to a LifeRing meeting last night. I had been to one a number of years ago and I had a similar experience again last night. It was a very small group of people sitting around a small table and it went around in a circle and each person talked about whatever was going on with them. I arrived a bit late, but I don't think there was a "speaker."

Cross talk was encouraged and there was no "program" being spoken of. It was refreshing. It seems that the mandate for meetings for some programs is that you relinquish all notions that you have a discerning mind and give yourself over to the group mind.

There was no cult-like aspect to this.

One thing that was disconcerting though. The guy leading the group (and it wasn't obvious when I walked in because everyone was just sitting at the same table) had only used drugs for 10 years in his teens/early 20's. He hadn't used for 33 years and he still needs to come to meetings?

What hope is there for me who's drank for the last 30 years? Jeez. At that rate, it's gonna take me several reincarnations to get to the point where it's a non-issue.

I don't know his whole story though. He might have done some really bad stuff and the pendulum has to swing a lot before it comes to rest.

There was no recitation of rules or sayings or prayers in this meeting. Perhaps there was a minimal spiel at the beginning, but I was only 7 mins. late or so, so it couldn't have been that long. At other meetings I've been to, up to half of the meeting is given over to recitation of philosophy, rules, etc.

Despite recommendations, I come late and leave early. When I see old timers who have been coming for decades I think, 'how can they keep from going batty hearing 15-20 mins. of the same thing (or close to it) every meeting, year after year?'

I don't really feel comfortable holding hands with people and praying and reciting some group thing at the end of a meeting. Yeah, I'll hold hands, but I keep my eyes open and I don't recite the words. It reminds me too much of my religious upbringing where raising any rational question got me in the cross hairs as a rabble rouser when I was just asking reasonable questions.

There are a number of options out there. What feels good to me might not feel good to someone else, and visa versa. For some people, being told what to do is what they need because they're at the end of their rope.

Just as an aside, I started watching the film "My Name is Bill W." last night. I'll finish it tonight. So far I'm enjoying it. It's not hoaky or preachy so far, but a good stand alone period piece of drama. Even though it's in color, I feel like I'm right back there at the days right after WWI. Of course, I could stand to be corrected by anyone still alive who remembers those days.

Just as another aside, someone mentioned on another thread here that there was was nothing to do in his/her town but go out drinking and recount how wasted they got the night before with the local yokels (can't recall if it was a man or a woman). There are a million things you can do besides that. Whatever you're into, there's a place on the internet for you, and at least you won't fall down and smash your face and risk dying of hypothermia.

Being a welcome member of a confederacy of dunces is nothing to strive for.

Thanks again Dee and Anna for making SR a place where you don't have to buy into any one philosophy. Perhaps there's something else like it, but once I found this place, I parked my bags and stopped looking.

If it ain't broke, don't fix it.