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Old 01-21-2013, 03:50 PM   #1 (permalink)
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a little about me & how i came here


Hi. It had recently come to my attention I have a problem with alcohol when my beloved boyfriend dumped me due to me blacking out and saying some horrible things to him. Also in the same night I was informed that I will need to start looking for a new place soon. Its been very rough few days with immense amount of feeling utterly alone.
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Old 01-21-2013, 03:52 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hi and welcome to SR! There is a lot of great support here... Read and post often and just don't drink no matter what!!! (yeah I know easy to say, not so easy to do)...
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:01 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Welcome to the forums,

We can lost a lot through our addictions. But what we gain in our recovery outweighs the loss we felt. Take it easy, nice and simple, and one day at a time.

Natom.
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Welcome to Sober Recovery.
You are amongst friends now.
Every journey starts with a single step.
You will be OK.
Read, post, read some more.
:ghug3
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:20 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I was told by one of my kids that I needed to stop drinking. I didn't listen to her, of course, and kept on going until she threatened to move in with her dad. That made me think but all it really did was make me hide it better...

I finally got sick and tired of being sick and tired and stopped drinking on my own (with the help of my addiction counselor and this site). I've been sober three years now and never felt better.

You might be in the dumps now but the longer you stay sober, the better your life will become.
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:24 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Welcome to SR, losn. I'm sorry you're in a bad place. You'll find a lot of help, support and knowledge here. These folks are the best. Stick around, you can do this..life is more manageable, sober!
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:27 PM   #7 (permalink)
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thank you

Right now every minute is a struggle. I just keep thinking of who I can call to go have a drink with. Especially since its a friends b'day and tomorrow is a year anniversary of the death of my best friend. Being alone is tough.
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:30 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Sometimes being alone is good. Its probably best to surround yourself with sober people. Have you considered a recovery program like AA, AVRT, or SMART?

Natom.
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:34 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I have but with my work schedule doesn't really allow me to attend. Also, the ones I'm finding is religion based and I'm not religious at all & have a bit of a negative history with religion. That's why I joined this chat. I realize I cant do this alone & with day being my weekend I just want to buy a bottle and hang out at a friends drinking the day & night away.
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:40 PM   #10 (permalink)
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welcome losngevrythng

There's many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

The main thing tho - whatever you decide to do - is do something.
In my experience, inaction (for whatever reasons) just leads to more drinking.

D
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:40 PM   #11 (permalink)
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If you're not religious or spiritual you probably would find AVRT helpful. Theres a secular forum on this website and a lot of active AVRT members. That being said AA is just a spiritual program. The literature all says God. But its whatever you want your God to be. Mine was Morgan Freeman from Bruce Almighty.

Natom.
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:41 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Remember,
Alcohol is NOT your friend.
Alcohol made you into the person who spoke to your boyfriend in a mean way.
Alcohol is NOT YOUR FRIEND.
Get used to feeling.
Feeling is normal.
Feelings are real.
It is tough at the beginning.
Just for today, don't drink.
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Old 01-21-2013, 04:47 PM   #13 (permalink)
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You are not the first one to burn bridges while being drunk. I always hated the question ,"Do your friends or family complain about your drinking?" The truth was ,"Yes" I could never admit it. It is a warning sign that you may have a problem. If you do it will get worse until you stop. You have come to cool place to discuss it.
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Old 01-21-2013, 05:09 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Welcome losn. You aren't alone - so many of us have been through a similar situation, & we all understand. I think it'll help you to keep reading and posting here.

I'm sorry for what you're going through. My drinking led me to a similar place. You can reclaim your life and move past this sad time. It will all work out. Don't give up on yourself - you can do this.
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Old 01-21-2013, 05:17 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Thank you Dee74. Im trying to stay active & not dwell on everything. I will look into those links you have provided. Im trying to stay positive. I guess I can only take it one minute at a time right now.
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Old 01-21-2013, 05:23 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Thank you all. Your words are helpful & encouraging. Its good to know im not alone and going through this on my own. I like alcohol but apparently alcohol doesn't like me & i had to lose the one person who made me promise to quit to begin with and was supporting me, i fell off the wagon that night and I've been regretting it ever since. I need to learn to quit concentrating on the past on and start looking towards the future. The desire is still strong but i need to be stronger and your words are helping me to continue taking those first steps to a better me.
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Old 01-21-2013, 05:32 PM   #17 (permalink)
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That was lovely to read.
Just for today.
That is how it's done.
Do it for you.
Be all that you can be!!!!!
Don't think too far into the future.
A day at a time is manageable and works for many of us.
Life gets better, then you have to remind yourself why it got better.
That is the trick.
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Old 01-21-2013, 06:45 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Just turned down an offer to cry in a beer with a friend. This is tough
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Old 01-21-2013, 06:59 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Way to go! I know its hard to say no.

Every day gets better. This forum has helped me stay sober over a year.

Read and post a lot.

Join the January 2013 forum. That's all the folks quitting now.
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Old 01-21-2013, 07:02 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by losngevrythng View Post
Hi. It had recently come to my attention I have a problem with alcohol when my beloved boyfriend dumped me due to me blacking out and saying some horrible things to him. Also in the same night I was informed that I will need to start looking for a new place soon. Its been very rough few days with immense amount of feeling utterly alone.
This was also my story. I can remember it so well, though it was a long time ago now. I had to pack and leave our apartment. I remember the tears, hurt, confusion...

Natom's advice is spot on:
"We can lost a lot through our addictions. But what we gain in our recovery outweighs the loss we felt. Take it easy, nice and simple, and one day at a time".

I have been in therapy and sober for over a year now. I actually met my ex in the street a few months ago. He has moved on, and is happy, and to be honest, I was happy that he is happy My anger and sadness are just not there anymore

So you can do this, one day at a time
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