Witnessed a close call
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,711
Witnessed a close call
On my way to a meeting a friend called to say she had bought alcohol but didn't drink it yet. Long story short we got there and a woman with a lot of sobriety stayed with her while we went in to the meeting. I have been dealing with fantasizing about drinking lately. I saw my friend in tears holding onto this unopened bottle and I am just like her. That could be me. In my mind today my fantasy consisted of being dressed up, pretty, dancing, drinking. In reality, it would be me crying, clutching the bottle, drinking, blacking out, possibly hurting myself again and ending up in a hospital. Cunning? Baffling? Powerful? Yes, yes and yes. However, my friend sat with that bottle for almost a half hour (without drinking it) before she reached out. Evidence of her higher power? I believe so. I am willing to hang on to my faith and hope of my elders that this will get better and easier. Recovery can be so brutal but also beautiful. So glad my friend is okay and that for today I am sober.
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 124
Hey quit. From experience I know what you mean. Its like the thoughts seem so real you think you are failing or something by thinking them. That is how I feel at least. The thoughts scare me, but one thing I have learned throughout this whole thing is thoughts are not real. I believe we have to go through these painful thoughts during sobriety and also cravings. They are just as important as the good thoughts. You start to recognize your faulty thinking and that is ok. Hang in there
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: San Diego
Posts: 611
That gave me chills. I remember when that was me, I used to sit on my hands for hours trying not to drink, praying, talking to myself, crying, shaking... I just couldn't stop. Sometimes I'd make it almost the whole day and then 10pm rolled around and I was out the door to the liquor store once again.
I'm so grateful to be free now. I'm so grateful that I can be the friend someone can call for a change instead of always being the one in a crisis. I'm glad the obsession to drink has left me for a time.
Thanks for your post. God Bless.
I'm so grateful to be free now. I'm so grateful that I can be the friend someone can call for a change instead of always being the one in a crisis. I'm glad the obsession to drink has left me for a time.
Thanks for your post. God Bless.
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