Need to vent..struggling
 

Hey all,
Went to a meeting before and I passed when it was my turn to speak. I just feel so down lately. I was on here last night asking when people felt physically better but mentally I am struggling as well. I have been getting thru cravings to drink but my AV is just so loud. Today I thought "What's the point? You're alone, accountable to no one, you feel like crap anyway, Are you really never going to drink AGAIN?" It's just so horrible feeling like this. I couldn't speak in the meeting tonight because I don't want to cry. I feel so weak. I talked to some women after and they did have encouraging words for me. And I WANT to hang in and I am safely thru another day sober but it hasn't been easy for me. I just want my life back which means my license so I can get around freely and not be stuck in the house besides for work and meetings. And I am SO SO grateful I am able to get to those places. Guess I am feeling sorry for myself and having a pity party :c021:

Hello quit:

When I get like that I get down on my knees and ask God for help.

Nothing special, just help. Thank him for all He's done so far and humbly ask for the strength for tomorrow.

Are you sharing with your sponsor or maybe one of the other newcomers?

The answer in in "How It Works". Ask God, He will direct you.

All the best.

Bob R

Hi Quit,

Thanks for sharing here. And don't worry about crying at the meeting.

Off to our meeting...

Thanks guys. Bob, I realized today that I haven't been praying as much as I was. And you saying it again reminded me, thanks :) It is such a simple thing I don't know why I haven't been doing it. Could it be self-sabotage? Definitely one of my character defects. I am constant work in progress...

Did speak to a couple newcomers too and they say they are feeling highly emotional like myself. Hoping for a better day tomorrow.

Remind yourself it won't be this way forever. :ghug3You just passed 60 days sober, right? I remember having some real struggles around those milestone days, though I can't explain it because I wasn't really dwelling on it as a milestone..... I also remember Carol (one of the mods here) suggesting I look up PAWS and that helped me feel like at least I wasn't alone.

The other thing is: I find that most of my troubles are relative; that is, when nothing else works, I try to remember that a lot of people don't even have the basics (enough to eat, a place to sleep, etc.) and I do a little gratitude exercise.
Hang in there!

Yes artsoul, I am 62 days in..that's really thoughtful of you to pick up on that :) You are so right...I really should make a gratitude list tonight. AND I will look up PAWS. It is just so good to hear that others such as yourself have passed thru where I am and made it. It allows me to keep moving forward when I have little strength!

That's the point right there Quit :)

D

Thanks for pointing that out Dee, that was pretty pivotal :)