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Self abuse, self loathing, and addiction.

Old 01-13-2013, 04:51 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
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Self abuse, self loathing, and addiction.

Hi,
I have been battling my addictions for the past year. It has been truly difficult.
Obviously, I have not lost everything. I manage to maintain a job, keep a roof over my head and keep an internet connection.
I have a car, an apartment, health insurance, 401K yada yada.
I have also been in jail around a dozen times, in different states. For substance abuse issues, DUI, possesion of marijuana.
I learned how to stop getting arrested about 8 years ago, keep everything legal, drive the speed limit, don't carry weed, alcohol, or paraphenalia in the car.
For me, I find comfort in knowing that there are others, like me, fighting the same battle.
This is new and challenging for me, because this new found group of peers are not family, nor did we go to school together, or even hold the same occupation.
I feel very fortunate that I have found people I can speak with, AA or what not and won't be judged.
My own family looks or talks to me like I am a leper or a stranger. Yet, I feel very at home with other people in recovery.
d
(cough)

I have strayed from the reason I started this topic.
What I am attempting to express is, I have an addiction problem and I appreciate everyone of you, who may have a similar problem.
Its already hard enough to address the issue, for myself.
And its a REAL comfort to be able to discuss MY problem to others who have been there, done that, or are working on sobreity, as well.

This is not my best post, and I probably could edit to make it better. I just had some thoughts I had to vent.

"THANK YOU"
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Old 01-13-2013, 05:32 AM
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Welcome to SR Ruserius

I got pretty good at minimising the consequences of my drinking too. To be honest though it made it worse in a way. By minimising the consequences the problem didn't go away but the reasons to quit did, and this prolonged the problem and gave me the excuse carry on drinking. But it's a bit of a pointless exercise anyway, as soon as you minimise one problem another one pops up somewhere else. For me it was health and anxiety problems.

I'm sure you'll find this place a huge help though, I really believe I wouldn't be sober today if it wasn't for SR and the people here x
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