slip
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: mass
Posts: 87
slip
Hi everyone, I dont think i have written lately. I had a good vacation and was sober the whole time. We are still doing work on our house. today is month 5 of no drinking. I remember reading somewhere that most of us will relapse or have a slip at some point in sobriety. I am wondering if and when it happened to any of you and how you felt afterwards.
Love Lin
Love Lin
Member
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Melbourne victoria
Posts: 1,975
Re: slip
Hi there Lin 
Congratulations on your 5 months !
I am so pleased you had a good vacation! I started mine yesterday , oficially , I usually go away , but i chose to stay close to my support system this time ( I am 6 months tomorrow)
I did pick up, when I had been sober 1 week, it only lasted 1 evening, and i went to a meeting the next day, suddenly GOT the concept of the FIRST drink, and havent needed to drink since , with the help of AA, and God .
HUGX
Lee
Congratulations on your 5 months !I am so pleased you had a good vacation! I started mine yesterday , oficially , I usually go away , but i chose to stay close to my support system this time ( I am 6 months tomorrow)
I did pick up, when I had been sober 1 week, it only lasted 1 evening, and i went to a meeting the next day, suddenly GOT the concept of the FIRST drink, and havent needed to drink since , with the help of AA, and God .
HUGX
Lee
Sweet Sounds of Heaven
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Point Blue, Louisiana
Posts: 1,144
Re: slip
Hello Lin and congratulations on 5 months of sobriety. You go girl, so proud of you.
Lin, so far by the grace of God I have been clean & sober. People that I talk to at meetings and here at SR, all say the same thing. They quit using there tools for recovery, they quit going to meeting, quit praying, thought they had everthing under control. Lin just stay close to your program reach out when you feel week and pray.
Take care of yourself. I am still waiting for you on the gratitude forum. Love you Lin. I am here for you anytime you need.
Lin, so far by the grace of God I have been clean & sober. People that I talk to at meetings and here at SR, all say the same thing. They quit using there tools for recovery, they quit going to meeting, quit praying, thought they had everthing under control. Lin just stay close to your program reach out when you feel week and pray.
Take care of yourself. I am still waiting for you on the gratitude forum. Love you Lin. I am here for you anytime you need.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: laughing at my avatar
Posts: 1,636
Re: slip
lin,
first off... know that relapse/slipping is not a requirement for recovery. there are many in the groups i go to that have not had a slip! i however have had many. that does not make them better than me, just they "got it" before i did!
my slips would start out innocent. i would still be around my using bf (now deceased) and would lay on the bed while the pipe was being passed. sweating and trying to talk myself out of it. because after all, i could "just say no" with the clouds swirling around me. of course i could have said no, but at the time i had no recovery. and did not realize that it was vital to get rid of the old playgrounds/playmates. so i would give in to the dope.
when i first realized i had a problem, i could go a few days without, but like i mentioned, my old playgrounds and mates were still present... so i stumbled many times wishing it would be different the next time. i wanted it the way I WANTED IT. when i used, it felt so good! all the cares in the world whisped away and i was speeding on rocket fuel. but as the crash came i would hate the world as everything came down. usually i would do more, but on those occasions i didnt.. i hated myself for using... couldnt understand WHY?
there was one time when i was taken along to a tweaker pad and i was just feeling so rotten. i tell you, there was not enough dope in the world to ease my suffering that night. it was one of those times when i was up for so long that i was just using to keep my eye lids from closing. well, the guy whose house it was kept commenting on how bad i looked! and every time, i agreed. i finally broke down once again and the binge continued. i had planned on just going home and crashing... had every good intention, but failed because i was in the wrong place and chose to use.
but... in the past 15 months i have been as close as that to using but have said NO and once tossed a pipe back and once tossed a sack back having just lost my money and the sack. so, it is not impossible to say no! which is wonderful news! do not get me wrong, my addiction is not beat. every day it is there waiting for me. but just for today i say NO!
hope ive been of some help!
hugs,
dot
first off... know that relapse/slipping is not a requirement for recovery. there are many in the groups i go to that have not had a slip! i however have had many. that does not make them better than me, just they "got it" before i did!
my slips would start out innocent. i would still be around my using bf (now deceased) and would lay on the bed while the pipe was being passed. sweating and trying to talk myself out of it. because after all, i could "just say no" with the clouds swirling around me. of course i could have said no, but at the time i had no recovery. and did not realize that it was vital to get rid of the old playgrounds/playmates. so i would give in to the dope.
when i first realized i had a problem, i could go a few days without, but like i mentioned, my old playgrounds and mates were still present... so i stumbled many times wishing it would be different the next time. i wanted it the way I WANTED IT. when i used, it felt so good! all the cares in the world whisped away and i was speeding on rocket fuel. but as the crash came i would hate the world as everything came down. usually i would do more, but on those occasions i didnt.. i hated myself for using... couldnt understand WHY?
there was one time when i was taken along to a tweaker pad and i was just feeling so rotten. i tell you, there was not enough dope in the world to ease my suffering that night. it was one of those times when i was up for so long that i was just using to keep my eye lids from closing. well, the guy whose house it was kept commenting on how bad i looked! and every time, i agreed. i finally broke down once again and the binge continued. i had planned on just going home and crashing... had every good intention, but failed because i was in the wrong place and chose to use.
but... in the past 15 months i have been as close as that to using but have said NO and once tossed a pipe back and once tossed a sack back having just lost my money and the sack. so, it is not impossible to say no! which is wonderful news! do not get me wrong, my addiction is not beat. every day it is there waiting for me. but just for today i say NO!
hope ive been of some help!
hugs,
dot
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Hollywood Fl 33024
Posts: 2
Re: slip
Hey lin127,
I had sent you a private message the nite before you left for vacation but you left before seeing it. Then the site got messed up so I guess you never saw it. My message was to let you know that they have meetings in florida too! I took my first vacation (Other than jail or detox) at 1year clean. I did 2 mtgs a day. My sponser told me that I may be on vacation but my disease wasn't. As for a slip I feel that is not a good name for it. Falling on my ass is more like it. Iv'e never had one myself but know lots of people that have. Everyone of them says the same 2 things. I stoped going to meetings and it's not getting any better out there. They also say that it's not the same anymore. The fun is gone. There full of shame and guilt. They are faced with a choice of coming back and facing their feelings and their fears or continue on the path towards jails institutions and death (not necessarily in that order). Alot of them fear getting honest and humble but when they finally do they find that WE welcome them back. Theres no shame in picking up a white one. The shame is in staying out there.
I had sent you a private message the nite before you left for vacation but you left before seeing it. Then the site got messed up so I guess you never saw it. My message was to let you know that they have meetings in florida too! I took my first vacation (Other than jail or detox) at 1year clean. I did 2 mtgs a day. My sponser told me that I may be on vacation but my disease wasn't. As for a slip I feel that is not a good name for it. Falling on my ass is more like it. Iv'e never had one myself but know lots of people that have. Everyone of them says the same 2 things. I stoped going to meetings and it's not getting any better out there. They also say that it's not the same anymore. The fun is gone. There full of shame and guilt. They are faced with a choice of coming back and facing their feelings and their fears or continue on the path towards jails institutions and death (not necessarily in that order). Alot of them fear getting honest and humble but when they finally do they find that WE welcome them back. Theres no shame in picking up a white one. The shame is in staying out there.
Growing Up
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: right here
Posts: 614
Re: slip
I agree with Chy, keep going forward. I do understand what you are saying though. The reality of relapse is actually here everytime I visit, (no offense to all of you, please keep starting over!). I have had to make a plan many times to avoid the pitfalls.
Just this past weekend I was going out to dinner for the first time in quite a while, and I didn't want to go because I knew I'd be utterly surrounded by drinks and drinkers. I can avoid that environment, so mostly I do avoid it. But hubby had a business companion in town and we had to entertain him. Better out than at my house! But I need to take time that afternoon to prepare my mind, remember my options, and even rehearse my anwers to the old stupid question, OH, you don't drink?
First of all, I made it, phew. But last Christmas Eve, I didn't. How did it feel to relapse after 140 days? (expletive)-y. Horrible, awful, heinous, tragic! I was so so sad that I'd done it. I let myself down. Then I had to drag my sorry butt back here and confess. If you can believe it, THAT actually keeps me sober sometimes. The thought of coming here and having to confess again! It took me a month of "moderation" to get my act together again. Yet, if I ever am in that position again, I trust there will be an understanding ear to greet me.
My suggestion is to make yourself a relapse plan. Be aware of your strongest triggers, and when you see them on the horizon, stop and have a plan to get through it. If it seems too dangerous, don't go. I know someone who even chose not to attend the wedding of a close friend because he couldn't picture himself getting through it sober. And that was more important.
be well,
Just this past weekend I was going out to dinner for the first time in quite a while, and I didn't want to go because I knew I'd be utterly surrounded by drinks and drinkers. I can avoid that environment, so mostly I do avoid it. But hubby had a business companion in town and we had to entertain him. Better out than at my house! But I need to take time that afternoon to prepare my mind, remember my options, and even rehearse my anwers to the old stupid question, OH, you don't drink?
First of all, I made it, phew. But last Christmas Eve, I didn't. How did it feel to relapse after 140 days? (expletive)-y. Horrible, awful, heinous, tragic! I was so so sad that I'd done it. I let myself down. Then I had to drag my sorry butt back here and confess. If you can believe it, THAT actually keeps me sober sometimes. The thought of coming here and having to confess again! It took me a month of "moderation" to get my act together again. Yet, if I ever am in that position again, I trust there will be an understanding ear to greet me.
My suggestion is to make yourself a relapse plan. Be aware of your strongest triggers, and when you see them on the horizon, stop and have a plan to get through it. If it seems too dangerous, don't go. I know someone who even chose not to attend the wedding of a close friend because he couldn't picture himself getting through it sober. And that was more important.
be well,
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,709
Re: slip
Lin, if you don't go there, chances are you'll be o.k. If you don't think about going there, the odds just improved.
I had a slip 77 days into recovery. Two lousy drinks. I didn't feel good spiritually for five days. Congratulations on five months!
I had a slip 77 days into recovery. Two lousy drinks. I didn't feel good spiritually for five days. Congratulations on five months!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: mass
Posts: 87
Re: slip
thank you all
I needed to hear about the lousey feeling you are left with. thanks Dennis I did not get your [m but thanks for the thought.. I am hanging on. i have stress all through april,and may comming and want to be prepared. there will always be stress its just its worse at some times and whats comming is nerve racking.. evil thoughts dam them.. I figured i would really beat on myself if i slip so i avoid tempting places. go to meetings helps too. well got to go
Love
lin
I needed to hear about the lousey feeling you are left with. thanks Dennis I did not get your [m but thanks for the thought.. I am hanging on. i have stress all through april,and may comming and want to be prepared. there will always be stress its just its worse at some times and whats comming is nerve racking.. evil thoughts dam them.. I figured i would really beat on myself if i slip so i avoid tempting places. go to meetings helps too. well got to go
Love
lin
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