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Old 01-09-2013, 09:22 PM   #1 (permalink)
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starting college, again, AGAIN.


I'm giving college another shot. I was kicked out the first time for using, and went to treatment because being homeless in minnesota sucks. This fall, a year later, i was in the same position, but didn't go to treatment because i "wanted to see what would have happened last year if i hadn't gone." I ended up crashing on the floor of some potheads i "went" to college with, but they caught me using heroin and that was that. So now i'm back with my ever-so-proud parents. Haven't touched junk or killers since december 18th, and have been entirely sober since sunday. I start in a week, and i'm apprehensive about it because i don't trust myself not to screw it up again. I'm young (20) but i really question whether or not i'm jumping in too soon. I just can't comprehend the despairing monotony of menial work for another six months. Honest words are needed. Thanks.
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Old 01-09-2013, 10:44 PM   #2 (permalink)
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If you are able to go to college and not use drugs or alcohol then go for it but if you feel like you will crash and burn again don't go. Getting you're mind and body healthy again is more important because you will repeat the cycle over and over again. That will kill you're echo! Good luck with you're decision.
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Old 01-09-2013, 10:55 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Hey thanks man. I guess that what i'm saying has to do with self fulfilling prophecy. If i feel a certain way, that feeling doesn't necessarily translate into an end result, does it? I mean if i've spent most of my life feeling like i "can't," that's a poor reason to go ahead and NOT do something. I feel like i'm gonna mess up, but i just have to make sure not to. How to do that is a whole 'nother post haha
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Old 01-09-2013, 11:07 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Hi and welcome takeashowerman

I think it's worth remembering lots of colleges have support for this kind of thing - have you checked your campus out ?

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Old 01-13-2013, 04:02 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Yeah. It's a small community college so it really doesn't have any recovery. But the larger university in town here does have meetings, which is nice
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Old 01-13-2013, 05:48 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Just from my experience at age 50 and after throwing away many years to alcohol--

I "tried" to quit drinking many times, but going to meetings is what has made it stick. You just need to hear it, one addict to another, and I believe eye-to-eye is necessary.
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Old 01-13-2013, 05:59 PM   #7 (permalink)
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You know that feelings are just feelings and they don't dictate our actions and responses, or our lives for that matter. Feel the feeling, recognize it, and let it go. It doesn't control you'
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Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

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