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Old 01-08-2013, 11:22 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Arguing with myself


Since I relapsed again, I decided to give counseling a shot. I have to admit that I've never met an alcoholic that didn't have a high IQ, so this should come as no surprise that I am arguing there's nothing a counselor could tell me about my problems that I can't logically determine on my own. I've always thought I could handle things on my own cause hey...I'm bright! Albeit a moron when it comes to drinking.

So...is it worth it? Anybody that worried they were just inviting another person (the counselor) into your inner sanctum and nothing more, but ended up with useful insight that helped with the recovery? I'm afraid of spending hard earned money to hear platitudes I could just as easily find on Google or Go Ask Alice.
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Old 01-08-2013, 11:59 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I can only speak from my experince and i have to say it truly helps you. Honestly most of the revelations i got were discovered from me just speaking aloud and having someone truly listen to me. Granted there are sites like this for us online .. But there is nothing like the human connection.. As corny as it sounds but soul to soul .. Face to face... Granted this was years ago wen i was in rehab and i wasnt paying for it.. But at the time it truly helped and when i stopped discussing... 3 years later here i am on day 2 .. On the road back to recovery..
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:04 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I found that I could get sober, sane and serene in Alcoholics Anonymous and stay that way by working the program and attending meetings.

Not sure what my IQ is but I'll be sober 24 yrs shortly.
IQ to an alky is more of a detriment than an asset. I just had to learn to listen and be teachable.

All the best.

Bob R
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:04 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I've been reading this website Rational Recovery today. Go check it out.

anyways, to respond-

I totally feel the way you feel about a counselor. It just seems that I am smart enough to get to know them a bit, and chew their creditability, or shoot holes in their thought process, or whatever. I toally get what you are saying.

But- on the other hand, I have totally been trying to feel better for a long time on my own, and "here we are".... so I may try it, not sure.

I don;t want to end up on meds.
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:20 PM   #5 (permalink)
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The mind that caused the problem is unlikely to be the mind that fixes it. Get someone that has a history of treating addiction because they will not put up with an addicts BS
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:24 PM   #6 (permalink)
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hahahaha love it MI
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:31 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I can't tell you what to do, but I have been seeing a counselor with experience with addictions and she has been a great help. If nothing else, there are days I just need to vent, but she tends to offer me insight into myself that I don't see b/c I am living with the AV talking in my ear. I would recommend trying it for a while. If it doesn't work, you can always stop. If it does work, all the better!
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:42 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Change4Better View Post
I'm afraid of spending hard earned money to hear platitudes I could just as easily find on Google or Go Ask Alice.
If you could have gotten sober using Google, you'd be sober. Your best thinking got you to where you are now.

I say try it.
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:45 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Like anything else, if you don't go into it with an open mind (admitting you don't have all the answers) and a willingness to try something different/new (what you HAVE been doing isn't working), odds are you'll be wasting your time - and money.

For the record, none of us is (is/are?) as smart as we'd like to think we are. AND, I've met quite a few knuckle draggin alkies.
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Old 01-08-2013, 12:57 PM   #10 (permalink)
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All true. I'll call my insurance company and find a local counselor tomorrow and let the chips fall where they may. I guess at the very least, it will be nice not to have to pick and choose what I tell the person because they're totally apart from the drama and can't be hurt by any of it.
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Old 01-08-2013, 01:04 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Please please please give counseling a shot! I'm the daughter of a counselor, and bright too, and thought "come on, I know the tactics. This won't help."

It DOES. You have to find a good one though, so hunt around.

It works because you're basically doing one big cognitive feedback loop.
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Old 01-08-2013, 01:24 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I agree with what Committed said...... when we talk about things with someone who is willing to sit with us and ask questions, there's a different dynamic that goes on.

I know exactly what you're saying. When I went to treatment the first time, my biggest fear was that I'd be the model patient and come out just the same. I had a degree in Psychology, knew the problems I had and all the "answers" they'd throw at me. I also knew why those answers hadn't worked, etc. etc. blah blah blah......

The thing is: that's all head knowledge. It's one way we avoid what's really going on - we intellectualize it. All the emotions and fears are below the surface. Sooner or later, in counseling, they'll come up (and it's not always a good feeling at first because we don't want to feel vulnerable). It's worth it though - glad you're thinking about taking the challenge!
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Old 01-08-2013, 02:38 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Change4Better View Post
Since I relapsed again, I decided to give counseling a shot. I have to admit that I've never met an alcoholic that didn't have a high IQ, so this should come as no surprise that I am arguing there's nothing a counselor could tell me about my problems that I can't logically determine on my own. I've always thought I could handle things on my own cause hey...I'm bright! Albeit a moron when it comes to drinking.

So...is it worth it? Anybody that worried they were just inviting another person (the counselor) into your inner sanctum and nothing more, but ended up with useful insight that helped with the recovery? I'm afraid of spending hard earned money to hear platitudes I could just as easily find on Google or Go Ask Alice.
Hi Change4 Better,

You sound exactly like me, although it was not my IQ that kept me private. I had always been able to solve not only my problems but others too, so why can't I just do this myself, right.

Seeing a counselor was the best thing I ever did because it gave me accountability. Someone would be charting my progress and if your a proud freak like I was you would want to show them you could do it.

Only went to AA twice, it was not for me, so the higher power I went with was ME. I truly believe WE are the only ones that can make ourselves give up drinking. If i had to wait for a Higher power to tap me on the shoulder , mmmm don't know if I would be alive.

I was lucky I found a pretty smart cookie, no fooling her. She was an alcoholic also--went to her for smoking after we talked a little bit she told me my drinking was the bigger problem and I had to get sober before I even thought about smokes. I knew that but thought I could fool her and myself into avoiding the sobriety thing.

Worked with her for 3 months, never took a drink again and quit smoking 3 packs a day a year after I stopped drinking. Do it--I will always support a counselor for someone beginning their journey toward sobriety.

Good Luck!
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Old 01-08-2013, 02:49 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters View Post
I found that I could get sober, sane and serene in Alcoholics Anonymous and stay that way by working the program and attending meetings.

Not sure what my IQ is but I'll be sober 24 yrs shortly.
IQ to an alky is more of a detriment than an asset. I just had to learn to listen and be teachable.

All the best.

Bob R
You can not be to stupid for AA but you definately can think you are too intelligent for AA. I was way to smart for AA until I realize I was an idiot
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Finally content with a past I regret
I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself


Came back to life 7.24.2009
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