kizzy40

What am I doing?!
My daughter came home from uni for the holidays ...yey!
I stop drinking christmas eve she is elated and supportive..yey!

Last friday I asked her if she would go to the shop for alcohol if my mother (81 and alcoholic too) asked, as I couldn't risk putting myself in that position.

I explained it would just be that once, as my mother had agreed to stock up on her wine during our weekly shop on saturday.

Friday evening comes and she flatly refuses to go to the shop, meaning I have to go as it's too dark and cold for mum. ( I have asked her to stop with me but she won't)

I was stunned! after years of begging me to stop why would she do that to me?...
I took my 15yr old son with me and thankfully I didn't weaken and buy some for me, but by the time I got home I felt like I was having a panic attack! I couldn't stop crying.

I haven't spoken to her since, I feel so unsupported and angry.
Why am I doing this?
She will be going back to uni next monday and will miss her so much.

I stopped drinking to improve our relationship, why am I sabotaging it?
Am I being oversensitive?
I should just forget it right? I feel so vulnerable, like a crab without a shell.

awuh1

Don't expect your family to get it. One generation is still drinking and the other does not have a problem with it (herself). Take care of yourself now. The best support you can get is at an AA meeting. Lots of us there that know exactly what you are going through.

773niki

You have to understand too that the first few months are crazy! PAWS - post acute withdrawal syndrome - makes me feel like I'm having PMS all the time. Crying at the drop of a hat. I cried over going to a meeting once because I felt good and I cried about my dog being cute. I cried because I saw people sitting in a bar and because my stepbrother took a shot of vodka on Christmas. But, I'M SOBER! So, let the emotions roll out of you. It's ok - they gotta come out sometimes! Stay strong and congrats on making it through the lovely liquor aisles!

kizzy40

Thankyou so much, I will speak to her tomorrow and try to vocalise what i'm going through properly.