One Drink
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 42
One Drink
My Name is RaleighGirl and I am a Alcoholic. I own this, I know this, and I choose to have two drinks last night.
It was almost like I wanted to see how terrible I used to feel, sleep, get moody, just to remember. Will I do it again? No. I didnt want to spend the money, stay at home, be bored, or have the headache.
My attitude had been wonderful. My boss told me she likes the new me. (she thinks I am on a diet). People called me sunshine. It is a great feeling.
So many people on here give me great advice. One thing that stuck out is if you keep doing the same thing you will get the same result.
So, as a plan for penance, I am going to:
Luckly for me, I will be fine by monday and I can enjoy all the positive comments people have been giving me since not drinking. I choose to live THAT way, I really have a good life.
Thanks for listening to my confession!!
It was almost like I wanted to see how terrible I used to feel, sleep, get moody, just to remember. Will I do it again? No. I didnt want to spend the money, stay at home, be bored, or have the headache.
My attitude had been wonderful. My boss told me she likes the new me. (she thinks I am on a diet). People called me sunshine. It is a great feeling.
So many people on here give me great advice. One thing that stuck out is if you keep doing the same thing you will get the same result.
So, as a plan for penance, I am going to:
- Call my Dr monday
- start an outdoor activity with the people that have been asking me for years lol
- in the next 2 weeks, finally go to an AA meeting (without people that smell of vodka, that really discouraged me the last time)
- keep posting here and reading. this by far has been the best help for me ever, I should have been here last night
- not beat myself up, I am human, I can control what I do. I am not weak.
Luckly for me, I will be fine by monday and I can enjoy all the positive comments people have been giving me since not drinking. I choose to live THAT way, I really have a good life.
Thanks for listening to my confession!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 42
this is actually my second go at sobriety. Last time was in 2011 and I did it but didnt change my SITUATION. You HAVE to change the situation that leaves the breading grounds for you to fall into the trap of this disease. I am thinking really clearly this year. I am actually mad my sobriety date is 2013 and not 2012 like I planned. But I envisioned myself encouraging others years from now like so many on this site do day to day. I think I will go for a good jog this morning 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 42
I want to see my dr 1st, I have extreme anxiety of people and groups. I would not fair well today and probably run out like the last time I went. It is in my planner for the friday coming up. I have to write things down to do them lol.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,564
Hi Raleigh. It's good that you came here to talk about it. (Writing it down helps me, too.)
You learned something by having those drinks, & that's valuable. It sounds like you're even more determined now. It was so hard for me to admit that picking up wouldn't take me where I wanted to go. I finally let go of the idea that it would be fun and relaxing - that it would enhance anything. You are getting there.
You learned something by having those drinks, & that's valuable. It sounds like you're even more determined now. It was so hard for me to admit that picking up wouldn't take me where I wanted to go. I finally let go of the idea that it would be fun and relaxing - that it would enhance anything. You are getting there.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by RaleighGirl 
I want to see my dr 1st, I have extreme anxiety of people and groups. I would not fair well today and probably run out like the last time I went. It is in my planner for the friday coming up. I have to write things down to do them lol.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by Hevyn
Hi Raleigh. It's good that you came here to talk about it. (Writing it down helps me, too.)
You learned something by having those drinks, & that's valuable. It sounds like you're even more determined now. It was so hard for me to admit that picking up wouldn't take me where I wanted to go. I finally let go of the idea that it would be fun and relaxing - that it would enhance anything. You are getting there.
You learned something by having those drinks, & that's valuable. It sounds like you're even more determined now. It was so hard for me to admit that picking up wouldn't take me where I wanted to go. I finally let go of the idea that it would be fun and relaxing - that it would enhance anything. You are getting there.
lol Good Saturday Friends!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by beherenow
Rg, I used to go to the keystone meeting on sat nights in clt. 7pm speaker. I haven't been in a long time but it was good.
I think this is important for my recovery. 7pm Sat night, may of our trigger hours...
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 94
Speaker means you can sit quietly (less anxiety at least for me)
When I used to go I was in my early 30s, single and a professional. There was a nice mix of young and old. I never felt out of place...of course this was almost 10 years ago. There was a nice old timer who used to give us werthers originals candies I think his name was Tom.
When I used to go I was in my early 30s, single and a professional. There was a nice mix of young and old. I never felt out of place...of course this was almost 10 years ago. There was a nice old timer who used to give us werthers originals candies
I think his name was Tom.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 42
Well it is now 2015 and I have been through A LOT. Started drinking again (of course) but the worse part was that I became a very very very good closet drinker.
I have been sober one week now and I feel great (minus the body changes) my dr. gave me a physical and all my organs are working. I have always been really honest with her, and she has been blunt with me.
I was afraid, I don’t want to go this September and have her tell me my liver is messing up or my kidneys are failing.
I actually chose to stop this time not because I HAD to but because I WANT to. It is a strange feeling.
I moved into a house. I bought a new car. I changed jobs. I am actually social now. People actually like me (I think lol) I feel good about myself, and I actually go to sleep and wake up in the morning ready for the day. I find myself getting up earlier and earlier ready for each day.
I bought a brand new bed, to conquer my insomnia (due to booze) and a fancy smancy sheet set to pamper myself.
I tend to enjoy little things and spent time with my now grown son (he was 15 last time I posted)
Alcohol started to make my days fly by, I got crazy diarrhea (TMI) and at work I was annoyed and could not think straight. I started to take me 3 days to “get back to normal” and then by the weekend I found I was forcing myself to drink because Jose (quervo) was my boyfriend. We have broken up.
I think, wait I know I will make it this time, I am 40, I don’t want to be walking around ill and in a daze, and I finally realize my worth and how wonderful life is. I have finally come out of the fog.
How is everyone on here doing?
I have been sober one week now and I feel great (minus the body changes) my dr. gave me a physical and all my organs are working. I have always been really honest with her, and she has been blunt with me.
I was afraid, I don’t want to go this September and have her tell me my liver is messing up or my kidneys are failing.
I actually chose to stop this time not because I HAD to but because I WANT to. It is a strange feeling.
I moved into a house. I bought a new car. I changed jobs. I am actually social now. People actually like me (I think lol) I feel good about myself, and I actually go to sleep and wake up in the morning ready for the day. I find myself getting up earlier and earlier ready for each day.
I bought a brand new bed, to conquer my insomnia (due to booze) and a fancy smancy sheet set to pamper myself.
I tend to enjoy little things and spent time with my now grown son (he was 15 last time I posted)
Alcohol started to make my days fly by, I got crazy diarrhea (TMI) and at work I was annoyed and could not think straight. I started to take me 3 days to “get back to normal” and then by the weekend I found I was forcing myself to drink because Jose (quervo) was my boyfriend. We have broken up.
I think, wait I know I will make it this time, I am 40, I don’t want to be walking around ill and in a daze, and I finally realize my worth and how wonderful life is. I have finally come out of the fog.
How is everyone on here doing?
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
