pattyj

I turn 30 on Jan.3. I had a 30th bithday for my boyfriend in July. I rented a party bus, we went to wineries and were all blacked out for a few days. I went to other friends' 30th birthdays this past year; trips to Las Vegas, surprise parties, you name it. I also said I wanted to be out of the country when I turned 30.

I am sober now. It's been a long run but I have been drinking half my life and feel as though I've drank enough. It's time to try something new. My boyfriend asked, 'Now that you aren't drinking what do you want to do for your birthday?' He was going to return the favor and do a party bus and the whole thing. I told him, 'maybe something shiny would be nice but just staying home, some sparkling cider, a great dinner, hanging with the dogs sounds good to me.' I feel like an old lady but I also feel that I'm finally doing something good for myself.

Turning 30 has also made me think about what I have done in my life. Becoming sober has made me feel as those I'm losing friends and no longer having fun. Being a drunk made me feel as though I was never going to accomplish anything in life.
In the past few years, I received my Master's, bought a house, tried out roller derby (ouch!), learned to knit, traveled to Europe, gone on a cruise, taken glass blowing classes. I have had a great teaching job for the past 5 years, I have a car, I have beautiful nephews and an adorable stepdaughter. My family is supportive of me (although most are drunks) and I have a fantastic boyfriend. But I have lost just about everyone else because I only hung out with drunks.

Even though I have done a lot in my 30 years, becoming sober has made me feel as though there is still a lot out there that I can accomplish. I keep having to tell myself that I have a ton to be thankful for but I still feel lonely at times.

Having a milestone birthday is harder than I thought but drinking won't do anything to help it.

Anna

It sounds like you are ready to work on your recovery. And, yes, it takes time to make new friends, but I bet that the friends you make from here on, will be true friends, and not just drinking buddies.

pattyj

I think so too Anna. My goal is to get out there more, start going to meetings, take some more classes. But to stay away from those who drink. It's all very exciting but terrifying at the some time.

Thepatman

wise choice. after all how good can one get at drinking? there are so many other talents to develop ;-)

Sazzle

Hi patty, I can really relate to your post. I've done just over 2 months and some of my boozy friends have joined me. A couple have said I am an inspiration and one has quit full time. Give it a while and see what the fall out is. You'll see your big drinking friends as more of a millstone round your neck but some might just surprise you.

I think you are doing a wonderful thing for yourself.

Happy new year & happy birthday for the 3rd

S x

pattyj

Thank you Sazzle! And patman, there are many talents for us to try out instead.

Sazzle

And I don't intend to drag my heels!!

LSNP

Patty, I am friendless, too. I am going to resolve in 2013 to put myself out there, get out of the house, give it a go. People are not going to come beating at my door, asking me to be their friend. You sound like you have a great plan! Go for it. :-)

Dee74

sounds like an awesome year of growth and discovery planned Patty

D