pattyj

I started focusing on getting sober in September of this year. I can't seem to stay sober longer then a month. I stayed sober through a family Christmas gathering this past weekend but went to my boyfriend's parents house on Christmas day. I stayed sober until dinner. Then one glass of wine to celebrate turned into many glasses of wine. I was still drunk yesterday so today is my new sober date. I still feel like sh**.

Xune

Knowing how alcohol makes you feel, why do you suppose you chose to have that first glass of wine?

Do you think what you're doing to stay sober is working?

Have you considered that you may have to make some changes in your life and look for some more supports in order to succeed in staying sober?

TorontoGuy28

Many things had to change in order for me to get and stay sober...

In the first 3 months, I avoided all situations which reminded me of drinking.. Not easy, but I did what was best for me... Now nearly 2 years sober, I enjoy a new sense of freedom.. Not having that first drink is never an issue, I simply smile and tell people "I am ok for now", "thanks, I'll get me own drink in a bit"....

It was the alcoholic mind tricking me into taking that first drink back in the day...

Best of luck.

pattyj

I took that first glass because it was a small glass to celebrate with family. My problem is that it didn't stop there and never has.
I think it's time for me to start going to AA meetings in order to stay sober.
It's hard to cut people out of your life but those changes may be the only way for me to succeed.

hypochondriac

Maybe it'd be worth telling them what you're trying to do. I did with my family and although they don't get it and aren't entirely supportive, there is no way they'd expect me to drink with them to celebrate. Some people might give you a hard time about it but if you put your foot down repeatedly they soon get the message.

Xune

It seems as though your addictive mind has convinced you that alcohol is necessary when celebrating and that small amounts are safe to consume.

It is of course not necessary when celebrating and for an addict, any amount is dangerous. However, for you to realize this in the moment, is something you've got to work towards.

If you are incapable of abstaining when around alcohol, then perhaps you should consider that maybe you should keep yourself away from environments where booze is?

What's more important to you?

Continuing to hang out with certain people, or assuring you stay healthy and sober?

I would think the latter.

2granddaughters

I can't argue with the first sentence. It worked for me.

It may surprise you down the line who you'll find you have to cut out and who you won't. Don't make any judgments right away.

All the best.

Bob R

Paddler

I feel you. I used to think a month would be fantastic. I have thought that for 6 months now. Time after time over those 6 months I've thought... "wow, I feel great and I never want to go back..." Then the familiar restaurant, social situation (which I'm faced with a lot of), on and on leads to that one beer or glass of wine. Which leads to several. Which, leads to not sipping but chugging. Who chugs wine... really?

I found myself in your situation this past weekend. Saw so much alcohol around me I thought "what the heck"... and it went from buzz, fun, over the line, awful, can't remember... feel like absolute ass on Christmas Day.

I wish you encouragement while I embark on the same path to the same goal.

I have drank for some time to celebrate. It isn't working... time to try something new. I wish I could fast forward to one, two, three.... 6 months of sobriety and see how I feel. But, the journey might lead me to where and who I want to be. Good luck...

aasharon90

It's not the many drinks after the fact
but rather that first drink to start the
insanity of drinking all over again.

Just don't pick up the first drink is one
of those sayings I learned in early recovery
and remind myself of it everyday.

You can do it too.

Bubovski

Other peeps drinking can destroy a good resolve and as A.A. points out its that first drink that starts that drunken ball rolling. No first drink no problems
Psyching yourself up prior to drinking events may help retain your good resolve.

pattyj

Thank you for all the comments. They are all very helpful. I like the 'no first drink no problems' saying. That first drink is a bitch.

Sapling

For me that first drink would be fatal....For me to drink is to die. I don't think AA would hurt you at all. Worked for me. Try going to 90 meetings in 90 days and don't drink in between them...And see how you feel....I mean if that's what you want. First time I read this....I got it.

Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks-drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.

The Doctor's Opinion...Text of Alcoholics Anonymous