Feeling so bad
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 133
Feeling so bad
I'm on day 11 and I have been doing so well.
I am using Antibuse (half a tablet a day) and eating well, running, sleeping etc.
Felt so good over Xmas but yesterday afternoon, started feeling very low.
It is 'that time' (sorry boys) and I am aware that that isn't helping matters.
I'm also in the middle of a very frustrating project, that is taking a lot of energy and I'm getting nowhere fast on.
I also have these stupid feelings for a man who does not want me and yet I keep hanging in there (the above project is his) and he is on holiday having fun at the moment, whilst I am 'billy no mates' at home as usual.
I'm a single parent and although my kids are getting older, I still feel trapped and isolated so much.
I'm feeling so low and am just crying now... I can't drink but all I want is total oblivion right now.
I am using Antibuse (half a tablet a day) and eating well, running, sleeping etc.
Felt so good over Xmas but yesterday afternoon, started feeling very low.
It is 'that time' (sorry boys) and I am aware that that isn't helping matters.
I'm also in the middle of a very frustrating project, that is taking a lot of energy and I'm getting nowhere fast on.
I also have these stupid feelings for a man who does not want me and yet I keep hanging in there (the above project is his) and he is on holiday having fun at the moment, whilst I am 'billy no mates' at home as usual.
I'm a single parent and although my kids are getting older, I still feel trapped and isolated so much.
I'm feeling so low and am just crying now... I can't drink but all I want is total oblivion right now.
Recovering
Join Date: May 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,361
Hey UB,
You're doing great - well done on giving up this time of year. Mood swings are very common early on. The good thing is that when you've been through this one then the next time you'll know that you come out the other side just fine.
Give yourself a pat on the back and remind yourself that you've done superbly.
You're doing great - well done on giving up this time of year. Mood swings are very common early on. The good thing is that when you've been through this one then the next time you'll know that you come out the other side just fine.
Give yourself a pat on the back and remind yourself that you've done superbly.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 94
ultrabunny, I'm sorry you are down.
:ghug3
Maybe step back, take a deep breath and take one issue at a time? It sounds like you are piling a lot of stuff on top of yourself. Be gentle with yourself and proud. I am HOPING I get as far as you with 11 days. You are doing great and are an inspiration to me.
:ghug3
Maybe step back, take a deep breath and take one issue at a time? It sounds like you are piling a lot of stuff on top of yourself. Be gentle with yourself and proud. I am HOPING I get as far as you with 11 days. You are doing great and are an inspiration to me.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,097
Sending you big hugs 
It's hard at this time of year,especially when alone. Please don't drink though, that will only make it harder to deal with things
The difference between a bad day and a good day is just one day. Can you maybe go for a walk,change of scene some fresh air might help clear your head.
It's hard at this time of year,especially when alone. Please don't drink though, that will only make it harder to deal with things
The difference between a bad day and a good day is just one day. Can you maybe go for a walk,change of scene some fresh air might help clear your head.
Not Alone
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: South East UK
Posts: 1,513
Hey ultrabunny,
We have these times in our recovery. One day we are happy and feeling positive and then out of nowhere we are hit by feelings of sadness and despair. It sounds to me like there are a lot of conflicting issues that may be causing this shift in your mood. The festive season doesn't normally help us lot that much either. The only thing I would recommend to you is to write down all of the things that are troubling you on a little bit of paper. Write everything down, no matter how trivial it sounds, and then read the paper back through. Then burn that bit of paper and watch them turn into ashes.
This is a symbolic method of watching your troubles dissapear. They can also dissapear that quickly in real life if you discover the best way to deal with them. Regarding the work project. It is probably constricting you more than you think. Take some 'me' time if you can. Away from the kids and the confines of work. Even if it is only for half an hour. Regarding the man...he is just a man. I get caught up in the idea of people and relationships all the time. Unfortunately this happens and the only thing we can do about it is to try and stop thinking about it.
Regarding the isolation. If you have the time try a random spontaneous new hobby. Something you would never normally do. You can widen your friend circle greatly by doing this. Failing that make some friends on here. A lot of us are on here all the time and communicate by other means too. I hope you start to feel better soon
Natom.
We have these times in our recovery. One day we are happy and feeling positive and then out of nowhere we are hit by feelings of sadness and despair. It sounds to me like there are a lot of conflicting issues that may be causing this shift in your mood. The festive season doesn't normally help us lot that much either. The only thing I would recommend to you is to write down all of the things that are troubling you on a little bit of paper. Write everything down, no matter how trivial it sounds, and then read the paper back through. Then burn that bit of paper and watch them turn into ashes.
This is a symbolic method of watching your troubles dissapear. They can also dissapear that quickly in real life if you discover the best way to deal with them. Regarding the work project. It is probably constricting you more than you think. Take some 'me' time if you can. Away from the kids and the confines of work. Even if it is only for half an hour. Regarding the man...he is just a man. I get caught up in the idea of people and relationships all the time. Unfortunately this happens and the only thing we can do about it is to try and stop thinking about it.
Regarding the isolation. If you have the time try a random spontaneous new hobby. Something you would never normally do. You can widen your friend circle greatly by doing this. Failing that make some friends on here. A lot of us are on here all the time and communicate by other means too. I hope you start to feel better soon
Natom.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Distract yourself Ultrabunny. I have these 'what's the point' moments too, usually accompanied by a long list of why my life is sh*t... I usually say to myself 'Yeah, so what ya gonna do about it?'. I know I can't drink so I just get on with it and try and find something positive to focus on or do something fun which I know will make me happy. Play some loud music, Eat some nice food, have a bath... whatever cheers you up x
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
"billy no mates"......huh, that cracked me up, lol.
I'm on my way over, lol.
Hang in there, you're doing much better by staying sober than by drinking your woes away, (which never works anyway).
Feeling bad may seem like a real bummer, but at least you can feel today, and that's great stuff, for staying in the "no feelings zone" really drove me to drink. It does get better.
I'm on my way over, lol.
Hang in there, you're doing much better by staying sober than by drinking your woes away, (which never works anyway).
Feeling bad may seem like a real bummer, but at least you can feel today, and that's great stuff, for staying in the "no feelings zone" really drove me to drink. It does get better.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 133
I cant drink because of the antabuse but since i stopped for the most part ive been feeling good but i guess this is the pattern.
Feel good..cope ok...feel bad...need drugs.
I feel like a real addict today. i think if someone offered me something else i might take it.
Feel good..cope ok...feel bad...need drugs.
I feel like a real addict today. i think if someone offered me something else i might take it.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Somewhere in the sands of time
Posts: 1,462
Oh Ultra, don't take it if offered, in October when I stopped, I thought about getting pills or doing something else, but that just trades one problem for another, do your best to fight it and feel the feelings your having!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
Ultra, good for you for getting through the holidays with no drinking. It might seem difficult, but it could be helpful for you to start a Gratitude Journal. It's something that has helped me when I was really struggling.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,960
We don't numb our feelings. We push them deeper inside of us so when our bodies aren't numb, we feel, well, we feel the way you are feeling right now.
The only way to stop feeling the way you do is to get through the roller coaster of feelings once, feel all of the feelings that are surfacing.
Here's the coolest part---you'll never have to go through this roller coaster once you make it through now!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Feelings may change in the future, but not to this extreme.
Cry, laugh, feel. Feeling bad? Help someone else, clean the bathroom, get through that project. Accomplishing things helps us to "feel better."
If you want, private message me! I'm home all day today, unless I brave the cold severe winds to get to a store and back....
You aren't alone today! Not in the way you feel or in being "alone," someone is here for you and to listen to you!
Big Hugs & Lots of Love to You,
The only way to stop feeling the way you do is to get through the roller coaster of feelings once, feel all of the feelings that are surfacing.
Here's the coolest part---you'll never have to go through this roller coaster once you make it through now!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Feelings may change in the future, but not to this extreme.
Cry, laugh, feel. Feeling bad? Help someone else, clean the bathroom, get through that project. Accomplishing things helps us to "feel better."
If you want, private message me! I'm home all day today, unless I brave the cold severe winds to get to a store and back....
You aren't alone today! Not in the way you feel or in being "alone," someone is here for you and to listen to you!
Big Hugs & Lots of Love to You,
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Des Moines IA
Posts: 377
One point, sometimes alcoholics taking anabuse reach such a terrible emotional level after going without the illusion of relief that alcohol once provided that they drink out of desperation, because continuing in reality becomes so painful.
That's often hospital time, so though you hadn't mentioned considering doing that I thought it was worth mentioning.
That's often hospital time, so though you hadn't mentioned considering doing that I thought it was worth mentioning.
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