Weasel1966

You cannot see your strengths, but you gain confidence in their existence as they enable you to act. And the results of your actions you can see.

I reached a bottom, as its called, on December 9th. Just 18 days ago.

A friend of mine may have reached his just this week.

I have never felt so strong or focused as I am today on what I feel needs to be done to make real change happen in my life. It's like someone lite a fire under me.

I have a limited number in my inner circle that I can even tell the truth about what happened. Everyone else gets the fabricated version.

I don't have a lot of friends I see often. It was always bar people. And I don't miss them. But I saw some friends this week. What stood out was that when they spoke of things... About my relationship... About some upcoming plans... It felt so odd.

Everything changed for me and they have not caught up yet. It's a strange feeling. Like everything that was cannot be the same. I am not the same.

Sorry to babble on in yet another heady weasel post but I am so focused on what's next for me. What I need to do to get where I want to be that the absurdity of it all strikes me and I cannot help but share that.

Day 18. See my counselor tonight. Traveling this weekend to see a close friend that does know so I can speak freely. Feel great physically...except for my nose...but it's coming along.

K

lilgolden73

Weasel...I can relate to your post about the friend situation!! Thanks!

MsJax

Hi weasel . I can relate. I remember back in 2009 when my partner of 16 years & I separated. When people in our lives who couldn't know or understand would talk & I felt so separate, detached, knowing everything was forever changed in this circle...

That's all I've got, I understand.

Hope you have a really good day today

miko67

Weasel you sound like a gd man. Hope you are ironing things out ok!

MidnightBlue

Hi, Ken. Glad to hear you are doing fine and recovering. For me the key message of your post is that you are focused on the future. Keep it up!

Have a great day)

mittens2020

Even today, only 4 people out side of SR know that I am trying to quit. I can't even go on FB b/c most of my "friends" were acquantances from the bar. Every post is just a temptation for me to return to my old ways. Last night was the big "day after x-mas" party - first one I have missed in a decade. Seeing the pictures reminds me of what I was. Most of my is disgusted, but there is still a part that wants that back. I guess that is the part i keep working on.

BabyJane

Cool Post! Thx man!

Fandy

I think you are going to be OK Ken, very soon, life will iron out the wrinkles and you'll really blossom.

Glad your shnoz is healing too.

wpainterw

Hey Weasel!: GO FOR IT! You've got a great opportunity here if you've really reached your bottom! That first step is the big one, like a cliff at the beginning. If you've really managed to climb that cliff and are ready for the upward path, steep at first but gradually growing easier, then this is the moment to get the program underway. Whether it's AA, Rational Recovery or something else. I found that I couldn't do it alone. I needed help from other recovering alcoholics. Counseling was not enough. But aside from that I have no advice- just do whether works for you! Get in touch with others, get well together.
I'm so happy for you if you've actually managed to surmount that first cliff at the start. That's the big one. Good luck on going the rest of the way!

W.

instant

Weasel
Sounds like you are humming. Keep up the good work. It's an adventure.

CAPTAINZING2000

unfortunately, many people's bottoms are 6 foot under. And as long as we keep digging, we'll keep on having a deeper bottom.

Alcohol destroys us before, it eventually kills us !

escapist

Ken, you sound fearless!

Weasel1966

Escapist... Far from fearless....

I don't know many thing right now but I know to think small. One step after the other. Stay sober at all costs. Everything will happen in its right time.

I know my next steps so just keep doing.

Thanks for the support everyone!

Fernaceman

Hey Weasel. Good to see you, friend!!