The thoughts creeping in
 

The thoughts of drinking came creeping in this week.
I didn't succumb to this feelings. But feeling uneasy is putting it mild.
I watched my family as they downed their beers and wine, and saw something different than what meets the naked eye. I saw them drowning their troubles in their drinks of choice, yet still felt myself romanticizing.
Someone actually thought the ideas of bars being open on the holidays was good for people who have no family!!!! Seriously? I politely disagreed and changed the subject. They know what we go through, but stare the differences in the face, as opposed to the similarities. I've come this far and when I catch myself entertaining thoughts of one drink, I pray. I've prayed alot over the last few days. This Sunday will be 90 days, and I'm nervous about it. I know I won't drink today, and that's all I have. Best wishes to you all! Thanks for reading

good for you ...... for me it will never be just one that is just a fantasy....

NOt drinking toady is all you need.

I agree, and congrats on 90 days!! I am getting closer to that number too, and it is a good place to be!!! :)

It doesn't matter if you are a beginner,
in the middle, or long term sobriety,
thoughts of what it was like before, during
and after alcohol always pop in our minds.
We remember how it made us feel, what it
made us do and so on.

Even for me with 22yrs sobriety, letting
the newcomer know that i too entertain
the thoughts of alcohol that come to mind
from time to time. Especially when im not in
tuned to my recovery program. When Im
not incorperating the tools provided to
us in recovery to help us on a daily bases
to stay sober.

When im not eating right, sleeping well,
not exercising, not getting enough fresh
air, when im on the run all the time, not
taking time out to relax and let things
bother me, go. When different feelings
catch me off guard. Resentments, anger,
selfishness....all sort of triggers can get
the best of me and thoughts of alcohol
will pop up.

I use to depend on alcohol for all areas
of my life, but 22 yrs ago, i replaced the
madness and craziness of drinking with
a program of recovery to help me, to
teach me with the knowledge learned
of my alcoholism and live each day without it.

Each day sober i followed in the footsteps
of many who had achieved long term sobriety,
wanting what they had, that freedom from the
chains of alcohol. They had the knowledge of
recovery that was freely passed on to them
and they were passing it on to me. To help
me and guide me with a program of recovery.

Today when one of those thoughts pop in
my head, i play some of those old tapes
to remind me how aweful my life was while
drinking and how it almost took my life.

It just wasnt time for me to go yet, because
i was given another chance at life and in doing
so all i have to do is pass on my own ESH to
others struggling with addiction.

So far the promises in recovery as mentioned
in the Big Book of AA have come true and are
still coming true today. They can be for you too.

Don't think, meaning dont romantisize or dream
about drinking, don't drink and work a recovery
program. It works if you work it. Recovery life works
if you work a recovery program.

Fallingtogether - I am only at day 9 and I am not sure I am going to be strong enough to make it through today - the urge is screaming.

Always hate to hear people are suffering from trying to stay sober. I in fact fight the fight as well, no denying that. But that's just my trigger to fire up the knowledge of what I've been learning and applying to my life to stay sober. First I admit that I cant drink a little bit, now or ever. Then I remind myself what kind of life I have been pursuing and why. And of course reading the posts here is huge help. If it gets to bad I grab the phone an call the sober buddies to go do something together or just talk. For me it has only been since march but it's working so far. Good luck.

Falling together and Mittens

We only get ONE chance to succeed at living a sober life.

What if this is YOUR one. Don't screw it up weather it be 90 days or 9 days, you have laid a solid foundation for this to be the ONE!

I know I took the first opportunity to get sober for me opportunity only knocks once---I am a pretty unlucky person.
You may never get another chance to get this far, don't blow it!

...........and CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!:ghug3

Hey falling,

I'm glad you're resisting the temptation. We can only take life on a daily basis :)

Natom.

If you recognize that you're romanticizing it that's a huge step forward. The ability to tell the difference is what can keep you sober. Keep thinking until you get through to the other side. I remember the good times drinking but mostly try to focus on the not good times-the embarrassment, the chances taken, the awful smell, the time wasted, whatever it takes to kick start the smart part of my brain that wants no part of it.

I used to bartend on holidays so people would have a place to gather rather than sit home alone so I understand what they meant. I received a lot of heartfelt thanks so I know it made a difference for some people. It was never a big drinking time either, more like friends at a house party singing carols,etc.

Congrats on almost 90 days-that's a lot of solid sobriety :)

As long as I remember I can't drink, not even one, thats the main thing.\

Thoughts happen, especially in early recovery and especially at Xmas - it seems like everyone is drinking, and it's a really stressful time.

It's what we do in response to those thoughts that counts - and you seem to be doing fine FT.

You won't be sorry you stayed sober, looking back...stick with it - you too mittens :)

D

The holidays are rough on us in early recovery. Your feelings are completely normal. Just remember once you get over these hurdles it will be easier. Be proud of yourself for sticking to your plan, in spite of all the temptations surrounding you.

Thank you for all your responses.