Notices

No more lurking, I can't do this alone.

Old 12-22-2012, 04:49 PM
  # 41 (permalink)  
Member
 
Maples's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Mass
Posts: 189
Originally Posted by MrsLamp View Post
thank you so much everyone i am so drunk i dont desreve such kindness.
Please come back again tomorrow. One day at a time.
Maples is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 04:51 PM
  # 42 (permalink)  
instant
 
instant's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
I'm late to welcome you Mrs Lamp. There is a way to peace through sobriety. The endless struggle can be a thing of the past. Just keep trying and keep posting.
instant is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 04:54 PM
  # 43 (permalink)  
Community Greeter
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,416
You DO deserve it. You are among friends - we've all been there. We're just like you. Please don't stop posting.

I drank for 30 yrs. I was in the same state as you when I finally quit for the last time. I was a wreck at home, but would show up for work every day - armed with my eyedrops, breath mints, perfume - thinking no one would know I had alcohol in my system 24/7. I even took it to work with me to sip on during the day - otherwise, I'd shake. Then I'd drive home in that condition. We are all in our own private hell until we reach out for help and friendship - the way you have. I hope you'll stay with us. There is life after alcohol, we promise.
Hevyn is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 05:04 PM
  # 44 (permalink)  
Member
 
wpainterw's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Mrs. Lamp:
Just let me say how much I agree with Maple's post about the importance of going to a doctor. I understand your concern about working in a health care environment but what you say to a doctor is confidential and cannot be disclosed without your consent. Entirely apart from that, unless your situation is medically treated it is very likely to get much worse, endangering not only yourself but also your health related credentials. Getting proper treatment is essential to safeguard your professional status, your job and career. Good luck. Every good wish to you!

W.
wpainterw is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 05:21 PM
  # 45 (permalink)  
stepping on my way...
 
stepping's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,079
Originally Posted by MrsLamp View Post
Please help, always been scared to join but I am getting worse very quickly now,bottle of vodka every night between us, feel and look like death, but cannot stop! I thought I could do this alone and I was different its taken a while for it to dawn on me that you all were right and I was wrong. I feel like 2 people, the one just now is the hungover drunk in the stained jammies, the other is the person who goes in to work all made up and chirpy and helpful, they must see how yellow my eyes are, I can't keep this up much longer, I hate my job now like everything else but I know deep down that it is because of the drink I hate everything. I am so sorry to go on, this was just going to be a short post, but I would really like to join and see what its like to face life sober. I am living a lie, always lying and pretending everything is fine and its not. I used to be so strong. sorry again for going on. Thanks for reading best wishes to you all on here.
Wow, MrsLamp. I could have posted this before I quit drinking. You can turn this around. YOU CAN! You are in charge of that!

I always thought I hated my job bc of alcohol too. When we sober up and start living instead of just surviving we have a chance to see who we really are. I realized I hate my job of five years even when sober. I stayed there for 5 years bc I was fogged up from alcohol. I quit drinking and at around 60 days sober I quit. I moved closer to family after that.

I also thought I just hated life and myself when drinking. I don't sober. Turns out I love life and all it has to offer. I laugh. I talk to people. I don't have anxiety anymore. The depression vanished. My physical appearance changed for the better. I lost 10 pounds. My liver is happy! Turns out I am a pretty kool chic

Point is you can stop this but you HAVE TO stop drinking! Once you make it past the first week of WD stuff will start falling into place.

Just stop drinking and things will start happening.

Your post touched me. :ghug3 Hang in there and don't be so hard on yourself. Start making changes and start living!!

Start with AA, SR and a doctor. I did all that plus some. I couldn't do it alone!!!!! I tried and failed miserably many times! I was willing to do whatever the heck I had to to stop drinking. You have to put in the effort. It is SOO worth it. This is your life....the only one you get!!!!
stepping is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 05:30 PM
  # 46 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
MrsLamp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 131
please stay with me, typed and deleted reams just now. I really want to get better. I am drunk now. If you all please bear with me I know if I get better I could be so helpful to others. I do not want to bore. I do not want to be a waste of space. sorry.
MrsLamp is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 05:32 PM
  # 47 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 11
I'm so sorry you are suffering. I think you need to see a doctor before you quit. A bottle of vodka a night and then quitting could be a pretty ****** few days. I also highly recommend AA. I just started going, I've been to 9 meetings and it has been a huge help in my sobriety journey. Hang in there. You have a beautiful life waiting for you. Take a chance and leave the vodka behind.
pheona123 is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 05:41 PM
  # 48 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
You have to learn how to live differently, how to live sober.

I have 315 days today.
It was hard at first.
I had lots of early nights, did a lot of cleaning, sorting out junk for car boots, had long baths, drank hot chocolate, found good books to read, went for a drive and played loud music, took myself to the cinema. All things you can do too.

I even had to smash my favourite glass and get my bottom off my sofa and move to another room.

I won't lie it was hard at first.

But soon I had a day 1, a day2, a day3, a week, a month...and it got easier.

Now, hand on heart, I have a fleeting thought a few times a day about a drink, but on the whole it would seem strange to sit and drink all evening like I used to.

So smash that glass, get up off the sofa and get busy.
I promise you in time you will be proud of yourself.
You will wonder how you found the time to sit and drink for hours.
You will feel better.
You will not be exhausted all the time.
Your health will improve.
You will not feel like a fraud living two lives.

Put the early effort in and you will reap the rewards.

My best to you xx
Sasha4 is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 05:44 PM
  # 49 (permalink)  
stepping on my way...
 
stepping's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,079
Mrs Lamp - still here. Looks like a lot of us are with the active readers. Hey, why don't ya get some sleep tonight then come back tomorrow and let's start making a plan. With all the experience here we could get ya set up with a real good plan to start with. First one is EASY....put the drink down THEN we can figure out a way to keep ya off the drink

And I would LOVE that help you are offering! But ya gotta help yourself first then you can help me
stepping is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 06:01 PM
  # 50 (permalink)  
Member
 
Maples's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Mass
Posts: 189
Originally Posted by Hevyn View Post
You DO deserve it. You are among friends - we've all been there. We're just like you. Please don't stop posting.
Spot on.
Maples is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 06:23 PM
  # 51 (permalink)  
Keeping it simple!
 
LadyinBC's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
Yes, please keep posting and never quit trying!
LadyinBC is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 06:51 PM
  # 52 (permalink)  
Member
 
wpainterw's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Mrs. Lamp: Do something for us! Leave your computer on and connected to an energy source and keep logged on to this website. We are going to be here for you through the night and until you're feeling better. Please keep posting. If you feel real bad you should call 911. It's very important that you have folks to communicate with when things are tough for you.

W.
wpainterw is offline  
Old 12-22-2012, 07:09 PM
  # 53 (permalink)  
Member
 
Delilah1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,021
Welcome to SR!! You will definitely find support and people who are where you are now, or have been. I have about two and a half months, and it is nice waking up sober every day. Still tired most mornings, but I will blame that on working full time and having three kiddos.

Keep reading and posting it helps!! I used to log in daily to keep accountable, now I log in just to see now everyone is doing.
Delilah1 is offline  
Old 12-23-2012, 12:07 AM
  # 54 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
MrsLamp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 131
Hello everyone I'm back, head is sore and I'm hungover. On my second mug of tea DAY 1. Alcoholic and married to an alcoholic, we have traveled the same road, enabled each other, There were drunken promises to fix this thing, He is as miserable as I am. I dont know if I care any more. I've got to believe there is a way out. I don't even have a tree up in the house. Then I feel very selfish reading that back because in the great scheme of things going on in the world what does it matter. I have stuff to do today with my kids, lots of make up will be needed and lots of lies. They have plans for Christmas and that is suiting us as we don't have to bother. My Mum died a just over a year ago and you know I have hardly shed a tear? I don't want feelings, maybe that is it. thanks for all the support again. I'm not sure if I should start a new thread or do I keep using this one, will people still reply to this?. x I will see what happens.
MrsLamp is offline  
Old 12-23-2012, 12:18 AM
  # 55 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,048
Keep this thread going for as long as you like MrsLamp.

I know it's scary but I hope you decide for change - sounds like you deserve more than what you have at the moment.

It doesn't get better either - not changing is kinda like running full pelt into a blind alley.

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 12-23-2012, 12:44 AM
  # 56 (permalink)  
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 42
It's brilliant that you haven't thrown in the towel Mrs L!
Christopher99 is offline  
Old 12-23-2012, 12:55 AM
  # 57 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Allentown pennsylvania
Posts: 47
We're not going anywhere. You've got the support of an allstar cast of genuine individuals who want amazing things for you. Don't give up, don't give in, the life ahead is worth the fight. I can't tell you how much better I felt after a 2 day detox. When I checked in my dad said " its gonna be ok, you might be here a week. Finally get some rest and just think of it as a break in the action". He was right since he was in all of our shoes at one time as well. And If you think that's your best avenue to get this all started then I hope you look at it positively as well. One way or another we'll get you on our team =)
Ssdawg1422 is offline  
Old 12-23-2012, 12:56 AM
  # 58 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Birmingham
Posts: 87
Hi Mrs Lamp, you haven't failed you just haven't been given any help yet. If we could all just stop by ourselves then we wouldn't be here in the first place. I really tried by myself for a year and only ever got as far as day two and always felt like a failure. After having this properly medicated and monitored detox this week I'm now on day 8. This is the longest time ive been sober in the last nine years. Things might not happen over night with your doctor and don't feel guilty for drinking whilst they assess you.just setting the wheels in motion is a start and even that will make you feel more positive. There is always hope! : )
Alex41 is offline  
Old 12-23-2012, 01:07 AM
  # 59 (permalink)  
Member
 
ultrabunny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 133
Mrs Lamp. hello, I hope you are ok. (I'm in the uk too btw)

The way I see it is that you and you husband need to have a honest conversation about what you have been doing and what you want to happen in the future.

I am on my own now but I know how bloody hard it is when you have to deal with your own cravings when there is someone else wanting to drink too.

If you both want to stop then you can help each other.
ultrabunny is offline  
Old 12-23-2012, 01:10 AM
  # 60 (permalink)  
Member
 
ultrabunny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 133
And one other thing, I have tried to stop drinking over and over. 'Failed' again and again.

I think now, it's a journey. If it were easy, then we wouldn't all be here asking for help.

Don't beat yourself up. We are all the same here. :-) That's why it's so cool!
ultrabunny is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 2 (0 members and 2 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:10 AM.