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-   -   Gonna quit alcohol.. Please Help (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/278345-gonna-quit-alcohol-please-help.html)

k37 12-21-2012 11:02 PM

Gonna quit alcohol.. Please Help
 
Been drinking since I was 16 now I'm 31; started drinking beers then moved on to Vodka at 23. Got my 1st DUI in 2007, 2nd one this week.. I've decided to quit drinking. Please provide some tips.

GirlFromCO 12-21-2012 11:07 PM

Hey K37 :) Welcome to SR. Quitting drinking is the best decision an alcoholic can make. Are you drinking tonight?

k37 12-21-2012 11:10 PM

No. I just got out of jail yesterday and my goal is not to drink again.

GirlFromCO 12-21-2012 11:13 PM

That's awesome, good for you :) Have you tried quitting before?

k37 12-21-2012 11:24 PM

I did once. I went sober for about a year, but then I started again and drank even more.. These last couple of months I had been drinking about 4-6 days a week. I was taking about 10-14 shots a day, and this last Monday I took about 12 shots after work, and on my way home, I blacked out and crashed into a car. Got arrested and was put in Jail for 4 days, and I'm never going back there again. So I would like to get some tips on staying sober..

GirlFromCO 12-21-2012 11:30 PM

Wow, I'm so glad you're okay. It sucks that you're in trouble but you have your life. The best advice I can give you on staying sober is to hang out on SR and read as much as you can. Not to be all cheesy but someone was just saying that getting sober is like climbing a mountain that has an endless number of trails to the summit. It all depends on your style, personality, needs... what works best for you might not be what works best for others. You could start with the "biggies" like AA or AVRT to see if you want to try working a program. There's lots of info about both on this site. Lots of people do it without a program too. Just depends on you.

k37 12-21-2012 11:34 PM

Thanks.. I will continue reading others threads.

GAD 12-21-2012 11:39 PM

One thing that was vital for me is remembering what made you decide to quit. Remember the consequences of your actions and the way you feel now. Keeping that perspective will make it look less appealing. Best of luck! You WILL get through it.

NapsteR1 12-21-2012 11:39 PM

Hi and welcome K37, finding a place like this is a good start, I've found loads on here that helps. I was reading an interview with Bill Nighy which summed it up for me, Bill describes himself as having been a sober alcoholic for over 10 years (at the time of writing).

"I used to drink and it was terrible and now I don't. It's marvellous when it stops," he says. "It's not like having a drink in a normal way, you are in chemical thrall on a metabolic level."

It's that chemical level that means we can't just have one.

Dee74 12-21-2012 11:44 PM

Hi K37

most people use some kind of programme I think - you don't have to, but I think it's good to at least look at your options :)

There's many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

D

soberlicious 12-22-2012 06:13 AM

k37
glad you are here

I second reading all that you can. Right now, pain is raw and things are fresh in your mind, but your resolve to quit can weaken as time passes. Understanding how the addicted mind works was very helpful for me. That's how I could see what was happening to me when those cravings came up and get through it. Read, learn...

To understand how powerful the mind is, just ask a woman during childbirth if she's ever going to do that again...lol
but some time goes by and you forget the excrutiating pain and you do it again. In this case, it's a good thing that the mind can "forget" or override experiences that are powerful/painful because otherwise the population would really suffer. But in the case of addiction...you can learn how your addiction may try to override your jail experience.

Good news is, you can learn and you can quit and you can be free. You can do this:) It's awesome over here on the other side :)

DFU 12-22-2012 06:27 AM

Congratulations on your decision to quit. I'm very new to recovery and I know it is terrifying and surreal, but just start at day 1. In the short time since I've quit I quickly came to fully believe that alcohol is "cunning, baffling, and powerful". It will do everything in it's great power to see you fail and destroy you. Get to an AA meeting and start meeting other people like us... believe it or not, there are millions of people just like us and they will want to help you.

Fandy 12-22-2012 06:41 AM

i'm glad that you did not injure anyone else or yourself in the car crash.

i know you are frightened about the legal consequences waiting down the road, but try to be rational and relax....right now no one should be overwhelming you about what method to follow, just stay sober for today and try to relax. If you have been detained in jail for the last 4 days, that is traumatic enough.

do you have any trusted friend or family member you could speak with.

someone is here 24/7 to talk to also. feel better.

2granddaughters 12-22-2012 07:32 AM


Originally Posted by k37 (Post 3730107)
Been drinking since I was 16 now I'm 31; started drinking beers then moved on to Vodka at 23. Got my 1st DUI in 2007, 2nd one this week.. I've decided to quit drinking. Please provide some tips.

Best tip I've got if you're an alcoholic is go to AA.

All the best.

Bob R

freshstart57 12-22-2012 08:29 AM


Originally Posted by soberlicious (Post 3730393)
To understand how powerful the mind is, just ask a woman during childbirth if she's ever going to do that again...lol
but some time goes by and you forget the excruciating pain and you do it again. In this case, it's a good thing that the mind can "forget" or override experiences that are powerful/painful because otherwise the population would really suffer. But in the case of addiction...you can learn how your addiction may try to override your jail experience.

The flip side of this is also true - the mind is easily powerful enough to overcome any addiction, especially the one to alcohol. The trick is to find the way to strengthen and educate the mind to do this. The way to start this process is to believe that it is possible for you to quit drinking. You can stop drinking, we all can.

Here are some ideas that helped me.
  • I didn't tell myself that I could never drink again. I told myself I would never drink again. Not 'can', but 'will'.
  • Stop thinking about the things you won't do anymore, and start thinking about the things you can do by remaining sober.
  • Deciding to quit drinking, making that solemn vow to never drink again, is freedom. It's freedom from the shame, the depression, the anxiety, insomnia, the hangovers, the declining health, it can all be behind you.

You can do it. Start by believing in yourself. Onward!

sirbiznitch 12-22-2012 09:08 AM

im going through the same thing right now...
 
Quitting is hard

k37 12-22-2012 11:48 AM

Thank you all for your advices. I know that it's going to be very difficult especially when I've been drinking for 15 years. I'm signing up on Monday for AA meetings and a court ordered 18 month alcohol program, so this should keep my mind busy for a while.

Weasel1966 12-22-2012 12:11 PM

Lots of good advice on here.... But the best advice I can give is simple. You need to want it. I tried and tried while never really wanting it. Now I do and I see the difference.

It sounds like you do want it like so many here. SR is a great place... You will find a lot of support! Welcome.

Coldfusion 12-22-2012 12:31 PM


Originally Posted by sirbiznitch (Post 3730594)
Quitting is hard

Quitting is easy: just don't take the first drink. Staying quit is the hard part: it means not taking that first drink.

My wife got a DUI and went to rehab before her court date. We quit drinking for a while, but then started again--several times, and we had a few more disasters.

Now, we are both going to AA meetings almost daily for 51 days, and I think that's what is going to make it stick this time.

By the way: get a lawyer. We showed up at court without a lawyer, and she was just going to plead guilty. Wrong! Fortunately, we found a lawyer in the courthouse who wasn't busy...


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