Just need to vent
 

My first post after about 2 hours of reading other posts.

My AW has been drinking again. I don't know what to do. I searched the Internet and found this forum.

I don't know where to begin.

After reading some of the other posts I realized that things aren't as bad as I feel them to be. However, I don't want them to get worst.

She says she wants to stop but doesn't. I know that I can't 'make' her stop. That she is the one that needs to take action.

We're at the point that when she is drinking I just avoid her; I feel awful inside. I want to do something.

When she is sober everything is good. She says all the right things. I tell her to call me or text me when she wants to drink, so we can talk about what situation is causing her anxiety. Perhaps, we can address it some other way besides drinking. This worked for about a week. She would tell me she wants to drink, for me to buy it for her because she doesn't want to drink behind my back. But now she says she's tired of talking because it's too exhausting. She wants a drink. She's gone back to drinking in hiding.

I want our marriage to work. I want her to stop drinking. She says she wants to stop drinking. She says she wants our marriage to work too.

Well, I'm hoping that posting here is a step in the right direction. I feel like I'm doing something.

Alanon is a huge resource for spouses of alcoholics. You will be surrounded by people who understand and will provide guidance for you.

Your AW will only quit when she is ready which could be never until then Alanon will teach you coping stategies.

I went to an alanon meeting last night. It was helpful. Thanks for the info.

There is also a forum for friend and family of alcoholics. Lots of support from folks going through exactly what you are going through:

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information