Lenina

Guyver,

I didn't want to quit drinking. I just wanted to quit having the consequences from drinking. At some point I figured out the only way to avoid the consequences was to quit drinking and learn how to manage my life.

welcome to SR!

Love from Lenina

tomsteve

when my life was so disgusting i want to kill myself, i went to AA.
i was able to use the program and look at myself to find out the root of the anger.
i was an angry man for many years while drinking. found out through workin the steps i was expressing fear with anger.

Maylie

You say that drinking stops you from "snapping" on someone yet your responses to replys tell a whole different story.

"I once woke up in a police cell after being found with a knife by the police and another time for making drunken death threats against someone who I was convinced was trying and plotting to kill me first (while drunk).

" it doesn't help I seem to be physically strong while drunk that it took 4 cops 15 minutes to subdue to me in a small room where everyone got some type of injury.. basically a ticking time bomb."

"My neighbourhood is terrified of me due to what I've done while drunk, and I mean SCARED. I've often been compared to the Joker from the Batman films while drunk.."


"when sober I am a nice guy and sort of anxious around people - when drunk I am looking for a fight and I enjoy the complete power reversal from them to me"

...so now let me ask you, how is drinking making your life better or stopping your from snapping? Please see a doctor or therapist before you actually severely hurt someone. A professional can help you work through the underlying issues that cause the anger and can give you healthy ways to cope with the stress, anger, and depression.

bbthumper

For me, booze wasnt the problem. The problem was living sober. My feelings when I was sober were practically unbearable and the only effective way of dealing with that and finding some comfort was through alcohol. So its stands to reason that when someone like me puts down alcohol things are going to feel worse not better. Why would we feel better by putting down the only thing that makes us feel somewhat right.
I had to find a new solution. The 12 steps of AA is what did it for me. It not only gave me a way to be free of alcohol, but gave me a way of life in which I am happy and useful. Sobriety is not something I have to bear anymore. It is a beautiful thing and I enjoy the heck out of it.

soberlicious

Well, you have a couple of choices.
1) you drink, experience temporary relief...but likely find that stress is actually exacerbated by the "cure". Remain in an endless cycle of misery. Barely exist.
2) make changes in your life and/or find some truly effective ways to cope with the crap. Only experience a "normal" amount of misery. Really Live.

I picked door number 2 and it's really worked out well.

hamabi

Contemplating living a totally straight life without any alcohol or drugs to run to made me as terrified as a little child staring up the dark attic steps into the blackness.

Hope you find the light switch, as it's actually quite a comfy cozy place. All the monsters we imagine lurking here don't really exist.

When all the monsters have disappeared it vastly improves our neighborhood relations, too.

Delilah1

Hi Guyver,

First, welcome to SR the fact that you are on here means that you want to stop, and that is a great first step. It sounds like you and D have connected and having someone who is st the same part of the journey is very helpful. I would definitely talk to a doctor and counselor to help with the withdrawals and anger issues.

Read and post lots on here, it helps.

TSDD

LOL. Yeah, you sound like a happy-go-lucky drinker to me.

Seriously, bro. Seems like you're the last guy in your town to realize that you have no business drinking. Why not try NOT drinking for a prolonged period of time and see if that doesn't improve things for you.

If you're uncomfortable without a drink, good, that's more verification that you shouldn't be doing it. I can tell you that you can stay sober in that condition and you won't feel like that forever with some continuous and uninterrupted sobreity behind you.

Virg

The way I see it...in my case is that I am full of
Depression, anxiety and anger. When I drink the anxiety and depression manifest as anger. The consequential hangover and regret fuels more anxiety and depression. Remove alcohol from the equation and the regret goes. In a sober, clear mind state the other problems are a lot more manageable.

pattyj

Are you snapping and feeling all this anger because you feel like sh*t yourself because you drank the night before? I have found that the little things bug the hell out of me when I am still drunk from the night before or going through a hangover. Traffic, the checkout lady, my boss, the whiny kids I teach, my dogs barking, the list could go on forever. It got a little worse after quitting drinking. I was going through withdrawals, really not feeling good and wanting to get drunk badly. I told myself that I needed to give my body a break. After I got through that first week, things got better though. Traffic still sucks and the checkout person can be an idiot but I understand why my dogs were barking and I could get the kids to tell me what they wanted rather then just whinning for attention. It does feel like drinking makes you happy for that moment but it doesn't help you in the long run.

wpainterw

D104 wrote: "I have set my quit date at 1/1/13. I have called AA to find out the nitty gritty and I will go to a meeting to test the waters for myself. I also bought the Allen Carr "easy way to stop drinking" book and currently reading that (you can drink while reading it), I have purchased hypnotherapy apps aimed at stopping drinking, I did (and plan to do again) the avtr crash course (google avtr), I basically live on here 24/7. Addictive personality much haha"

This is awesome! Like planning a camping trip, setting the date, renting a tent, a cookstove, insect repellant, pith helmet, etc. except that it all pertains to giving up booze! A book which says there's an "easy way" (ha! ha! on that one!) and that you can actually "drink while reading it" (give me a break- you can drink while reading any book; that's the problem, not the solution). And an AVRT "crash course". Why the "crash"? Didn't work if you're still drinking. And hypnotherapy.
Why not keep it simple at the beginning. Like go to an AA meeting (find a meeting which you like and where you feel comfortable; when you called them what did they say was the "nitty gritty"? Was it "just go to a meeting- here is a list") and see whether you can work with that. If not (but give it a very good and conscientious try), then try something else. Anyway, learn to paddle the canoe a bit before loading up a lot of other equipment. The important thing is getting the show on the road. Why not set the quit date tomorrow (Dec. 21)? Good luck.

W.

2granddaughters

Well, you can do as I and most of my friends did. You can take that "mustard seed" of hope and desire to stop drinking to an AA meeting.
That small spark of spiritual faith is all that is required and with regular attendance and willingness to begin to work the Steps will soon produce fruits that you cannot envision at this moment... you will have to trust me.

I didn't wait until I felt like quitting. On blind faith (because I had nothing left to lose) I committed to the program of Alcoholics Anonymous and I'm amazed where it has taken me.

I was you in 1989 and I'm speaking to you tonight. Who would you be helping in the future if you committed today ??

All the best.

Bob R

Sobersunshine

The steps of AA can help you get rid of anger and resentments. Really they can! Five months ago (as a drunk) I was angry, depressed, exrtremely anxious all the time, resentful, and pretty much deeply unsatisfied and unhappy. That has all turned around with AA. I am actually happy, peaceful, calm, and at times, even joyous. AA can definitely do miracles and I am one of them. Good luck to you!

junk33

when i am sober i get angry as well and get irritated quickly , but i havent punched holes in 3 doors ,smashed a toaster,threw my laptop across the room, challenged people to fights outside,ripped my alarm out of the wall while being sober..sure i might get a release from a drink or two but there is a fine line between this release from work and complete A-Hole the rest of the nite ..

Joe Nerv

You eventually come to the realization that alcohol is a depressant, and while it seems to be making your life more tolerable, it's actually adding to and most probably causing your current anguish. But in an incredibly deceptive way that leads you to believe it's your only salvation and/or solution. Then you decide to get whatever help is necessary to learn to live a much better life, without it.

We've all been there, done that. There is lots of hope for a much better future, without alcohol. I can absolutely promise that. Whether or not you believe me and others and take that path is entirely up to you. And it can be done now, or 10 years down the line when things have gotten much worse, which if you're an alcoholic, they're guaranteed to.

EternalQ

I thought I felt this way for a looong time. I would think it a lot:
"But EQ you don't even WANT to quit!"

This is what I discovered:
Quitting is what MADE me WANT to quit.

I guess it must be like what some people say about exercise or eating well: you don't really WANT to be disciplined about working out or eating right until you do it and begin to feel the benefits or see the results.

Then the benefits and results become their own reinforcement.

Prior to that, you just grit your teeth and start the change, and live off the faith and experience of others who tell you it will be far worth it if you put the time in now.

Because, they are right. So trust them.