icantgiveinson

I have 5 kids, 4 of which have been home their whole lives.
my son is 18+ and I have had him home on ankle several times,he was in and out of placement and juvie, and now at 18, no more probation etc.
he party's ,drinks,uses,etc.
i usually let him in ,but the past week no.
his counciller, people from church,even cops say,"Don't let him in."
he is rude,mean,direspectful,swears,(in fornt of his 3 younger siblings)...
"Looses" every coat, belt, whatever I give him, and yells at me "where are my clothes"
I am at the end of my ropes...Everyone he know's he owes...he can't sleep at very many more houses of his friends, and is a compulsive lier to eveyone.
I love my son more than anything, and he receiently lost his best friend to car accident, a wakeup call for many....he doesnt want help.
He said he doesnt have a problem, that I am overexagerating/////not.HELP!

sugarbear1

There's a Friends and Family Forum if you scroll down from the Newcomers.....

Al Anon or Nar Anon might help you!

glad you found us

2granddaughters

Give him to God and change the locks on your doors.

If he wants help God will be there for him the same as HE was for me.
If he doesn't it is out of your hands.

Call your local Al-Anon and talk to some of those folks, they'll help you.

All the best and prayers to you.

Bob R

Xune

In Ontario Canada, parents can boot their kid out of the house the moment they turn 16.

Your son isn't 16...he's an adult.

You have a decision to make.

Mulch

Do what you need to do to steer him toward a better life ..... In my opinion, that would be to change the locks and tell him he has to leave, and that you want what's best for him, and would like him to be able to come back some time, but he has to get help (counselling, etc.) and make some real changes, etc., etc. He's an adult, whether he seems that way or not. (I personally might also say to him that if he causes any trouble, the police will have to be called for the safety of everyone, including himself -- if you suspect he may cause problems that is.)

You sound like a really caring mom .. I know this must be a hard decision (I've never had to, but can only imagine), but it seems obvious that he's not going to choose to help himself if he doesn't have to ... and "kicking him out" will force him to make a choice - and I hope it's to get help and give himself a chance at a better life. Now is the time. He can turn himself around, but he has to want/need to.

And ... if/when he does get that help, he will thank you for this.

Good luck to him, and to you. You do have to look after yourself (it's not selfish), and the rest of your kids - You all deserve to be happy.

neferkamichael

Your son hollers at you, and you haven't thrown him out yet?

MIRecovery

his counciller, people from church,even cops say,"Don't let him in."

What other advice were you looking for?

Anna

I hope you make the decision to stop 'helping' your son.

Please check out our Friends & Families forum for more support.