kiwi1971

Great thread. It is day two for me and after alcohol destroying all of my previous relationships, and very nearly my current one the hardest admission I have ever had to make is that I am an alcoholic. I think I have known for a while buy didnt have the courage to accept it or admit it but it's been a liberating experience and one I'm sure will end up being the best decision i've ever made in my life.

Because of that honesty and the self reflection that comes with it I am hopeful that it will be an easy transition. I just pray that I'm not being too naive. I am pretty good at making changes when I commit myself and I'm thankful my partner suggested this site.

There are some amazing stories, amazing supportive people and a great support group. Ty for the post and for the site.

Cleanwithdreams7

Totally agreed that this is indeed a great thread. And to answer your question,
once the many negatives, outweighed the postive, I realised how not worth it the drug really was (this was mainly with Pot for me). It's actually incredible how badly Pot can actually affect some people and mess up their life aound them.

And with harder drugs like Oxys/Opiates, I really had to hit my biggest rock bottom(s) for it to really kick in there and for me to actually realise what I was doing to myself and everything around me, or who the drug was making me.. Opiates can really mask you and the situation going on around you. And for me, until your forced to sober up, you'll never really be able to actually realise just what's going on or the true reality of it all.

And when it comes to uppers like Cocaine and whatnot, I never was much of a big fan (at least once the stash was gone that is). While it was there though I never really could stop myself from using it, constantly, even if I was about to have a heart attack(literally)! But the next day when I awoke with no stash I was always left feeling like a pile of garbage and left hating the drug for getting me where it did. I've always thought of stimulants as pretty dirty drugs IMO. And don't even get me started on Meth! The two times I did tried it, I'm seriously lucky I didn't die.

And from experience, drugs are never worth it. Once the honeymoon phase ends, you're always left with a big ol pile of ****, and addiction, and a feeling of regret for ever touching the substance in the first place.

"For every action, there is a consequence."

renaldo

Wow! Pot never caused me any pain at all. I can't recall a single instance where I said to myself, 'I wish I hadn't smoked that bowl.' I decided to quit because I didn't feel like going through the effort of dealing with the guy I was getting it from and within 2 days it was out of my thinking altogether. Beer is an entirely different story. I tried both heroin and cocaine and didn't feel anything.

I tried meth twice and that was enough for me to realize that it wasn't a doable drug. The comedown was 4 times worse than the high, so the payoff was not worth it.

As for the alcohol, I was over a friend's house and he nursed a beer for an hour or so. When it came time to leave, he said, "what should I do with this? I guess I'll just pour it down the drain."

Say what? Refrigerators exist for a reason.

Kevah

My last drunk had me begging for death, meaning it, but not having the nerve to make it happen. I was in such a dark, deep hole and saw no way out. My shame for behaviors while drunk had finally come to a head and I could not deal with it. My decision to stop was the next morning when I was still alive and pissed off about it. I have no reason in my life, other than drinking, to cause me to not want to be here. I saw my children sleeping in their beds, unaware of the war that was raging in my heart and soul the night before and thought what it would be like for them if I decided to take that way out instead of just trying, really trying, to be sober. I absolutely knew that if I continued, they would find me dead of either my own hand on purpose, or by accident while drunk. No one wants their kids to find them dead. Looking back, I can't believe how far gone I was, but I am so thankful how far forward I am now. I truly believe in grace.

tomb

I just got sick and tired of being sick and tired