Just one glass of wine
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 26
Just one glass of wine
I would be starting day 4 today but last night had one glass of red wine after a stressful day at work...I didn't want more at dinner & didn't stop on the way home & grab a bottle for the night. I feel good today & still determined as I already feel healthier....what does everyone think of "just one glass of wine"
Is it naive or a possibility for some?
Is it naive or a possibility for some?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Washington
Posts: 879
If it wasn't an issue there would be no need for our question. People that can drink normally don't obsess about drinking one glass like alcoholics do 
. For every time I "moderated" & patted myself on the back, there were a hundred drunken times.
. For every time I "moderated" & patted myself on the back, there were a hundred drunken times.
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 536
Hey Bondi,
I am a wine drinker. Until three weeks ago, I drank at least a bottle of my lovely red wine every single night. Could I have just one glass right now? Maybe today, but if I did, I would probably tell myself it was okay to have just one glass tomorrow. And then another. For me it is easier not to drink at all, I don't trust myself not to keep on drinking.
June
I am a wine drinker. Until three weeks ago, I drank at least a bottle of my lovely red wine every single night. Could I have just one glass right now? Maybe today, but if I did, I would probably tell myself it was okay to have just one glass tomorrow. And then another. For me it is easier not to drink at all, I don't trust myself not to keep on drinking.
June
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
I hate quoting myself but it's easier than typing this out again
Originally Posted by me
'at least I didn't get drunk...'
It seems I'm seeing people saying this more and more often here these days....
I've actually been waiting for a day when I haven't seen it here, so I can post this and not have people think I'm picking on them...
but everyday I see some one post saying 'hey I drank, but at least I didn't get drunk'
I understand to a certain extent because I used to do the same.
When I was trying to get a handle on my drinking, not getting drunk was an achievement, a victory - it was hope to me, somewhere deep in me, that hey maybe I could control my drinking whenever I wanted....at the very least it was proof I was 'getting better'...
If I really looked back at my history I'd have seen the times when I drank 'like a gentleman' were the rare exception, not the rule.
I had 100s, maybe 1000s, of times where I got wasted and embarrassed or hurt myself or others - but I'd always go back to those handful of times where I'd had a glass or two and 'nothing happened'.
I really wanted to be a normal drinker, so I guess it's not surprising I clung to those few nights....but I'd always return to my normal pattern of drinking.
Looking back now, the truth was I was a blackout alcoholic drinker who sometimes had a 'normal' drinking experience - it was blind luck, not good management.
Please don't fall for the same lies I did for all those years.
Alcohol and I have a disastrous relationship. My drinking caused me immense pain and suffering, and it damn near destroyed me and all I loved....
if I drink - even one or two glasses - it's anything but a triumph.
D
It seems I'm seeing people saying this more and more often here these days....
I've actually been waiting for a day when I haven't seen it here, so I can post this and not have people think I'm picking on them...
but everyday I see some one post saying 'hey I drank, but at least I didn't get drunk'
I understand to a certain extent because I used to do the same.
When I was trying to get a handle on my drinking, not getting drunk was an achievement, a victory - it was hope to me, somewhere deep in me, that hey maybe I could control my drinking whenever I wanted....at the very least it was proof I was 'getting better'...
If I really looked back at my history I'd have seen the times when I drank 'like a gentleman' were the rare exception, not the rule.
I had 100s, maybe 1000s, of times where I got wasted and embarrassed or hurt myself or others - but I'd always go back to those handful of times where I'd had a glass or two and 'nothing happened'.
I really wanted to be a normal drinker, so I guess it's not surprising I clung to those few nights....but I'd always return to my normal pattern of drinking.
Looking back now, the truth was I was a blackout alcoholic drinker who sometimes had a 'normal' drinking experience - it was blind luck, not good management.
Please don't fall for the same lies I did for all those years.
Alcohol and I have a disastrous relationship. My drinking caused me immense pain and suffering, and it damn near destroyed me and all I loved....
if I drink - even one or two glasses - it's anything but a triumph.
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 26
Yes I understand, I felt guilty at busting but then felt quiet satisfaction that I craved no more,,, if only I was a normal 'take it or leave it' drinker. I just wondered about the 'sobriety' because yes I did feel glad I wasn't drunk....bring on your quotes Dee, you have seen these posts over & over & I appreciate your knowledge on the subject
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,040
I have tried to have one glass if wine many times. It never worked, my glass always led to more. I was at Ross yesterday and saw a giant wine glass, I chuckled to myself thinking "that is what I would consider one glass."
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Denver, Colorado
Posts: 5
There are cases of people who have been able to go to just one or two drinks after overcoming alcohol dependency, but they're a minority. I don't think that waiting 4 days and then having 'just one' is the best idea, because that's how you start again - you've gotten past the three day hump, don't ruin it now and have to start all over!
Clear Eyes Full Heart
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,272
If you turned to wine to deal with a stressful day there will probably be days in the future where just one glass won't do it, and then you're back to square one.
For me, there's no such thing as one glass of anything so I couldn't say...it's not possible for me.
For me, there's no such thing as one glass of anything so I couldn't say...it's not possible for me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 472
I used to be able to drink in moderation and oh, how I would love to go back to that period in my life but I know that I can't. I have now progressed to the stage where I am addicted to alcohol and one glass of wine soon leads to one bottle. Think back to why you decided to give up alcohol four days ago and the impact drinking was having on your life.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 26
4 days ago I could see my one bottle a day & more on weekends had turned 2 months ago into not going to work & drinking all day as much as possible as a reaction to a life changing event, my son was diagnosed with schizophrenia & had to move home. He can't drink & here I was guzzling on wine all day & night...I realised I had no control, not even for his best interests....4 days ago I decided I wanted to live with respect for myself in order to be the best support to him,,, thanks guys
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
As several others have said, if you have to ask the answer is probably no. But everyone is different. However, there are some bad signs:
1) You drink to cope. Big red flag. Alcohol doesn't help any problem get better. It helps us avoid problems, not solve them.
2) Moderation takes effort. If it takes herculean resolve not to drink, that's a message.
3) If you're asking if you have a problem it's probably because on some level you know you do. You're just not sure if you can admit it to yourself yet.
I loved alcohol, but I never got a thing out of moderation. I only loved booze if I could get get drunk off it. Hard to even imagine what fun it would be to just have one glass.
1) You drink to cope. Big red flag. Alcohol doesn't help any problem get better. It helps us avoid problems, not solve them.
2) Moderation takes effort. If it takes herculean resolve not to drink, that's a message.
3) If you're asking if you have a problem it's probably because on some level you know you do. You're just not sure if you can admit it to yourself yet.
I loved alcohol, but I never got a thing out of moderation. I only loved booze if I could get get drunk off it. Hard to even imagine what fun it would be to just have one glass.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: the interior of beautiful British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 37
Don't do it!!! When my mind is overtaken by the thought of alcohol; I count to 30 until positive non- alcohol thoughts are in my head. I've been down the "just 1 path"... doesn't work.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 59
So I'm following the advice of some of you and not drinking at all to see how that goes. So far so good. To me both drinking a lot less and not drinking at all take enormous will power and self discipline , things I have exercised but not as much as I would want. Both take effort of the mind, a lot of thinking. Many people mention that those first drinks lead to many more and if you are in this camp then abstinence may be your only option. My dependence has not been progressive , if anything I drink less than I used to due to lifestyle changes and an acknowledgment in my part that there is a problem. Alcohol has not caused problems in my life the way it has for others. My main worry is the long term effects on my health hence my desire to want to cut back. If I m unable to this then that would prove to myself that my emotional dependence to alcohol is more than I thought and at that time I will face a decision. But just starting out like this and learning from others is a huge help to me. Above all I will try to be honest to myself.
Been there, done that!
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: London
Posts: 539
i have drunk 1 glass of wine befor and stopped i have had half a bottle before and stopped. but i also have drunk 3 bottles in 1 night and gone out looking for more.
It means nothing, just because your alcoholic DOES NOT mean you cant drink moderate at times....but sooner or later the wheels fall off.....they always do!!
If you can drink 1 glass and and leave it for the rest of your days congratulations, me personally i dont see the point i drink to get drunk end off.....
It means nothing, just because your alcoholic DOES NOT mean you cant drink moderate at times....but sooner or later the wheels fall off.....they always do!!
If you can drink 1 glass and and leave it for the rest of your days congratulations, me personally i dont see the point i drink to get drunk end off.....
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Hi Bondi
Putting myself in your place, if I gave in and had 1 glass I think i would have given myself permission to drink again. I've said 1 year of total abstinence because I know drinking in moderation doesn't work for me, and may not in the future either.
Putting myself in your place, if I gave in and had 1 glass I think i would have given myself permission to drink again. I've said 1 year of total abstinence because I know drinking in moderation doesn't work for me, and may not in the future either.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: TN
Posts: 58
One of the many reasons I'm back here
I'm going to try sharing a lot over the future days here, but this thread hit a nerve with me. I used to have the worst every-other-day binge problem. I abstained for essentially a year, then thought I could get back into "moderation". It was so nice having a bottle of wine (OK Maybe 2) with my SO on a date night. *Sometimes* that would work.
When it didn't - the new pattern was wake up the next day, feeling a little hung over. I know the quick fix for that - maybe a bloody mary at brunch. That trips the moderation breaker in my head completely. I would be likely to spend the rest of the day drinking anything I could get my hands on.
These days the binges don't come so often, but even one is too much. This is what I need to stop. It is so easy to hurt myself and others with alcohol.
I tend to lose control when I feel really good and happy - I just have to remember that I feel good and happy because I've not been drinking!
When it didn't - the new pattern was wake up the next day, feeling a little hung over. I know the quick fix for that - maybe a bloody mary at brunch. That trips the moderation breaker in my head completely. I would be likely to spend the rest of the day drinking anything I could get my hands on.
These days the binges don't come so often, but even one is too much. This is what I need to stop. It is so easy to hurt myself and others with alcohol.
I tend to lose control when I feel really good and happy - I just have to remember that I feel good and happy because I've not been drinking!
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