More from the S****Y Committee in my head.
Powerless over Alcohol
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!
Posts: 4,018
More from the S****Y Committee in my head.
Good afternoon all. What a day I am still just in a great place from yesterday expierance.
But I want to continue on these thoughts from the great old committe that runs through this alcoholic mind.
So after we wondered where the heck we are , life has been nothing more than one crazy ride.
In drinking I had this simialar problem. Many mornings , one of the personalities up in my head would decide to quit drinking forever. By the afternoon or evening , another of us, without talking to the first one in the morning would start drinking. I had a serious communication in that all the people werent talking to each other.
Not to many things in my sobriety have been more important than, realization that my mind is composed of multiple personalities. As a group these cant make any sensible good decisions unless I act as the chairperson and bring some order to the meetings .
In that each individual has its own opinion and narrow point of view. One, is always afraid. What ever is brought up he says NO NO NO , Dont go that route , you will just mess it up.. Never suggests anything else. Ever.
Another has the opposite. Says go for it . As long as I am sober I can go anywhere , face anyone , and do anything. You have nothing to fear.
Another always watchs people and reports back of what they said , saying are you going to let them talk to you like that , do they know who their talking to. ect.
So you get the jist of what I am saying .. Thankfully only one of all the personalities I have is alcoholic. but he is such a loud mouth and very very pushy. Always shouting hey lets have a drink !!!!!!. I used to listen to this one almost 100 percent of the time.
Now I get to realize who is talking , and instead of hearing his command. I take it as a simple suggestion. And say thank you for your participation. Now sit down and we will call on someone else. And over time he just grumbles and growls and moves to ther back of the room, and waits. I will give him credit because man o man is he patient.
So with that in time I have learned that getting upset or angry ,lonely, and such really stimulates these personalities. So the ones I listen to move to the front of the room and talk the loudest and the longest. The ones I ignore move to the back and sit and goes quiet. But no ones ever leaves. And that alcoholic one just sits and waits till he thinks I will take his opinion and carry on the conversation he wants..
Well not today. I have a daily reprieve...
Have a wonderful day all
And keep living the dream and stay on the beam..
Good love, Inda ...
But I want to continue on these thoughts from the great old committe that runs through this alcoholic mind.
So after we wondered where the heck we are , life has been nothing more than one crazy ride.
In drinking I had this simialar problem. Many mornings , one of the personalities up in my head would decide to quit drinking forever. By the afternoon or evening , another of us, without talking to the first one in the morning would start drinking. I had a serious communication in that all the people werent talking to each other.
Not to many things in my sobriety have been more important than, realization that my mind is composed of multiple personalities. As a group these cant make any sensible good decisions unless I act as the chairperson and bring some order to the meetings .
In that each individual has its own opinion and narrow point of view. One, is always afraid. What ever is brought up he says NO NO NO , Dont go that route , you will just mess it up.. Never suggests anything else. Ever.
Another has the opposite. Says go for it . As long as I am sober I can go anywhere , face anyone , and do anything. You have nothing to fear.
Another always watchs people and reports back of what they said , saying are you going to let them talk to you like that , do they know who their talking to. ect.
So you get the jist of what I am saying .. Thankfully only one of all the personalities I have is alcoholic. but he is such a loud mouth and very very pushy. Always shouting hey lets have a drink !!!!!!. I used to listen to this one almost 100 percent of the time.
Now I get to realize who is talking , and instead of hearing his command. I take it as a simple suggestion. And say thank you for your participation. Now sit down and we will call on someone else. And over time he just grumbles and growls and moves to ther back of the room, and waits. I will give him credit because man o man is he patient.
So with that in time I have learned that getting upset or angry ,lonely, and such really stimulates these personalities. So the ones I listen to move to the front of the room and talk the loudest and the longest. The ones I ignore move to the back and sit and goes quiet. But no ones ever leaves. And that alcoholic one just sits and waits till he thinks I will take his opinion and carry on the conversation he wants..
Well not today. I have a daily reprieve...
Have a wonderful day all
And keep living the dream and stay on the beam..
Good love, Inda ...
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
A 'great share', as they say, IndaMiricale. I agree with you that a secure sobriety requires that we acknowledge that our desires, hopes, thoughts and dreams originate from and are maintained by different aspects of our personalities. Indeed, that is how we, as 'director' shape our lives, by feeding the 'good wolf' as opposed to its greedy, jealous, fearful and pleasure seeking partner.
You described very well a process for accepting that we have these harmful thoughts and desires. By recognizing them and acknowledging them, we are free then to ignore them and take any coercive power from them. Those thoughts are 'not ours', they belong to that alcoholic aspect and its voice. We can learn to recoil from that alcoholic voice, as from a hot flame, simply by recognizing its source.
That alcoholic voice is patient, and can sit and wait for that opportune moment, as you described. There is a way we can strip it of any camouflage and expose it whenever it starts up. We make a commitment to sobriety for good, unchangeable. By doing this, any thought of drinking ever again, or of doubt in our ability to stay sober, clearly can originate from only one aspect of us - our Alcoholic Voice.
A daily plan to stay sober is effective, but there is a whole new world of freedom there for the taking yours when that forever plan is made. You can never drink, and never change your mind, if you want to.
You described very well a process for accepting that we have these harmful thoughts and desires. By recognizing them and acknowledging them, we are free then to ignore them and take any coercive power from them. Those thoughts are 'not ours', they belong to that alcoholic aspect and its voice. We can learn to recoil from that alcoholic voice, as from a hot flame, simply by recognizing its source.
That alcoholic voice is patient, and can sit and wait for that opportune moment, as you described. There is a way we can strip it of any camouflage and expose it whenever it starts up. We make a commitment to sobriety for good, unchangeable. By doing this, any thought of drinking ever again, or of doubt in our ability to stay sober, clearly can originate from only one aspect of us - our Alcoholic Voice.
A daily plan to stay sober is effective, but there is a whole new world of freedom there for the taking yours when that forever plan is made. You can never drink, and never change your mind, if you want to.
Powerless over Alcohol
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!
Posts: 4,018
Originally Posted by freshstart57 
A 'great share', as they say, IndaMiricale. I agree with you that a secure sobriety requires that we acknowledge that our desires, hopes, thoughts and dreams originate from and are maintained by different aspects of our personalities. Indeed, that is how we, as 'director' shape our lives, by feeding the 'good wolf' as opposed to its greedy, jealous, fearful and pleasure seeking partner.
You described very well a process for accepting that we have these harmful thoughts and desires. By recognizing them and acknowledging them, we are free then to ignore them and take any coercive power from them. Those thoughts are 'not ours', they belong to that alcoholic aspect and its voice. We can learn to recoil from that alcoholic voice, as from a hot flame, simply by recognizing its source.
That alcoholic voice is patient, and can sit and wait for that opportune moment, as you described. There is a way we can strip it of any camouflage and expose it whenever it starts up. We make a commitment to sobriety for good, unchangeable. By doing this, any thought of drinking ever again, or of doubt in our ability to stay sober, clearly can originate from only one aspect of us - our Alcoholic Voice.
A daily plan to stay sober is effective, but there is a whole new world of freedom there for the taking yours when that forever plan is made. You can never drink, and never change your mind, if you want to.
You described very well a process for accepting that we have these harmful thoughts and desires. By recognizing them and acknowledging them, we are free then to ignore them and take any coercive power from them. Those thoughts are 'not ours', they belong to that alcoholic aspect and its voice. We can learn to recoil from that alcoholic voice, as from a hot flame, simply by recognizing its source.
That alcoholic voice is patient, and can sit and wait for that opportune moment, as you described. There is a way we can strip it of any camouflage and expose it whenever it starts up. We make a commitment to sobriety for good, unchangeable. By doing this, any thought of drinking ever again, or of doubt in our ability to stay sober, clearly can originate from only one aspect of us - our Alcoholic Voice.
A daily plan to stay sober is effective, but there is a whole new world of freedom there for the taking yours when that forever plan is made. You can never drink, and never change your mind, if you want to.
I like the line my mind has a mind of its own, and it likes to change its mind..
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: 4th Dimension of existance
Posts: 175
A little sidenote before I start, I LOVE what you call your committee in your head. I literally laughed out loud over here and had a room of people staring at me. :p I call the committee my gerbils because there seem to be a ton of them and all they do is run around aimlessly in my head. I am so back and forth in my thinking, too. It is so nice to know I am not the only one and that it doesn't necessarially mean I am technically insane. lol I just need to learn to listen to the right ones, huh? That loud mouthed alcoholic gerbil, though, MAN does HE need to GO!
That loud mouthed alcoholic gerbil, though, MAN does HE need to GO!
Do You Believe
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Washington DC
Posts: 112
IndaMiracle,
Wow. I love your committee analogies. Very deep and practical at the same time. I have been noodling the story below lately. Not sure where I saw it. May have even been from here.
A Cherokee Legend
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.
"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego." He continued, "The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
Wow. I love your committee analogies. Very deep and practical at the same time. I have been noodling the story below lately. Not sure where I saw it. May have even been from here.
A Cherokee Legend
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.
"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego." He continued, "The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Central New Jersey, USA
Posts: 1,345
Inda I love your posts.. They really make me think and are just - well - entertaining.
Dybehfar - I love the Cherokee legend just as much.
Not only do I get support and advice here but I learn so much. I think over the years I have gotten dumber and dumber (I was always tops in my class as a kid). I think I might be getting some of my smarts back thanks to all you smart SR posters!
Dybehfar - I love the Cherokee legend just as much.
Not only do I get support and advice here but I learn so much. I think over the years I have gotten dumber and dumber (I was always tops in my class as a kid). I think I might be getting some of my smarts back thanks to all you smart SR posters!
Powerless over Alcohol
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!
Posts: 4,018
Kevah and stepping. I am so glad I could bring a smile and a laugh. Laughing about things is a such a good part of recovery..
deybhafr .. I love that story also. I read that on here also. I have read so many cool stories here over the last 19 months I have been blessed to be here on SR. Its truly a wonderful site to be a part of..
deybhafr .. I love that story also. I read that on here also. I have read so many cool stories here over the last 19 months I have been blessed to be here on SR. Its truly a wonderful site to be a part of..
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,237
My Committee Meetings today are made
up of my fine feathered friends in the sky.
Birds.
Yep. Birds.
When im riding in the car I always look up
at the electrical wires connected to light poles
spotting one or more birds on them. If there
are just a few I see, I say, "hey there is an
AA meeting going on" or if there is a quite a
few of them, then its either a Committee
meeting or a AA Convention.
Those birds have taken the place of committee
meeting I use to have in my head and now are
where I can spot them high on a wire and smile
with delight.
Can you spot those committee meetings where
you live with birds on a wire? Are they AA meeetins,
Committee meetings or Conventions?
Where 2 or more are gathered together.
I also have a metal art of different colored
birds sitting on a wire stretching 36 inches
across hanging on my bathing wall so I will
always have my committee meeting of birds
available to see.
up of my fine feathered friends in the sky.
Birds.
Yep. Birds. When im riding in the car I always look up
at the electrical wires connected to light poles
spotting one or more birds on them. If there
are just a few I see, I say, "hey there is an
AA meeting going on" or if there is a quite a
few of them, then its either a Committee
meeting or a AA Convention.
Those birds have taken the place of committee
meeting I use to have in my head and now are
where I can spot them high on a wire and smile
with delight.
Can you spot those committee meetings where
you live with birds on a wire? Are they AA meeetins,
Committee meetings or Conventions?
Where 2 or more are gathered together.
I also have a metal art of different colored
birds sitting on a wire stretching 36 inches
across hanging on my bathing wall so I will
always have my committee meeting of birds
available to see.
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