gnes990

So today is day # 16 for me. Tomorrow will be the longest that ive gone without alcohol in 12 months. Ive been on these cycles of going a week without drinking and then drinking on my weekend, feeling really horrible, and then going another week. My last drinking day was on thanksgiving. It is probably one of the scariest episodes ive ever had. Ive never been one to black out, as I usually have good control over how much i drink (dring one night). But I dont even remember getting ymself into bed that night.

Anyways, a few months ago when I first started to decide to quit drinking I felt GREAT when I got to day 7,8,9, etc. Its probably because it was something I had not experienced in a long time. Im having issues this time around now. I have my depressed days sometimes, but most of the time I just feel emotionless. I cant find anything positive to look foward to anymore.

Yesterday was my 22nd birthday and it was pretty bad for me. I feel like I am doing nothing with my life (even though I technically have a pretty bright future), but moreso the issue is that I dont have any motivation to do anything productive with my life. Its mostly because I am affraid to "start: my life. For example: Some days I feel really excited about starting a career, but most days I am affraid that emotionlly I am not at all ready for that.

Its good that I am getting sober, but these last few months have been a rollercoaster for me. Too many highs and lows. Do you guys think this lack of motivaion and emotions is part of quitting? How long do you think it will take for me to start feeling happy about my recovery again? Thanks.

Delilah1

You should feel proud that you are sticking with it this time. Starting a career is scary, but exciting at the same time. I wish I had the sense to stop at your age. I will be 42 this week, and I am just about at two months.

Try to focus on the positive choice you are making to ensure a bright future!!!!

Andante

I've been there and felt (or not felt, as the case may be) as you do.

The more times you go through the cycle of periods of drinking followed by periods of sobriety, the harder it can be on your brain (Google "alcohol kindling" for more information).

Part of why your emotions are out of whack might be because this time, your brain chemistry is taking longer to stabilize. 16 days is great, but it can take a lot longer than that, especially if the "kindling" thing has started. It's different for everyone, but the general rule of thumb is that 3 months of sobriety is about the minimum before you can make a realistic assessment of your progress.

Kudos on the decision to stop for good! The good news is that you're young and your future is bright -- but only if you can stay sober.

WalterX

Like Delilah said, you should be proud! Yes it's difficult and yes you've made mistakes in the past, but EVERYONE goes through this process. It's great that you're sticking with it.

I mentioned this on a similar post in another thread, but I found that one of the best things for me was finding new things to do instead of drinking. Building new, good habits that replace the old bad ones made things a little easier. For example, I go to the gym and have become a bit of a foodie. These are positive habits I'm in control of.

Dee74

Welcome gnes

Happy Birthday for yesterday

I don't know about anyone else but I was quite depressed when I quit.
Not drinking was a big change for me - and my body and mind were pretty missed up.

Give yourself a change to heal...

if you're concerned you might be clinically depressed tho (or have been in the past) of course seeing a Dr is a good idea

D