Starting to be dangerous!
 

Well, I wish I'd found this forum much sooner! Story short. Married 5 yrs ago. He said he used to have a drinking problem. I was soooo nieve, never knew an alcoholic. He thought he could start drinking socially. ( he had gone to AA for 4 years before we met.) He has been a functioning alcoholic for the whole time I've known him. Does not drink daily but gets drunk every few weeks. Usually just makes a fool of himself in front of friends then goes to bed. Now things are escalating. He is getting mean when drinking. I have been very afraid of him the last couple times he has been drinking. Says he knows he needs to go back to AA, but hasnt made any effort. I have thought about leaving, but we are very involved in our community and I love where we live and our home and friends. I do not want to leave what we have. I really love him. I'm finding that threatening to leave, pleading , crying or begging isnt making him change. What do you folks do, just put up with it all? We are in our mid 50's have no kids at home and I do not work. I'm at wits end.

Sorry for what you're going through, sadstate.

Scroll down a little bit on the main page and check out the Friends And Family section. There are many others who've been through what you're going through and I'm sure they'll have some insights for you.

You don't have to endure anything. When you say you don't want to loose what you guys have... Question for you is there to answer.

You unfortunatly cannot make him decide, he needs to do this for himself. Ultimatum, might work but risky.

All the best!

I hope your husband decides to seek help for himself.

You might find that AlAnon is a good support for you.