sorry
p***enger
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,042
sorry
for anyone who has noticed me, i'm screwed. sorry. i expect i'll return at some point. i don't know if this kind of message is okay on this forum, but this is a great site, and paying attention to the positive messages here must lead to mental health. sorry, again. see ya' later, prob'ly.
p***enger
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,042
you guys are great! sorry, i just haven't been able to take it. i'm crying now. i decided to choose sobriety after finding out that two old REALLY close friends (e.g., lovers) killed themselves, and also for physical reasons because my stomach is a mess!--, but maybe it was all too much-- i reached out to people i hadn't seen in many years, talked about the suicides, this whole thing has been so hard. tonight i just couldn't deal... you know what i mean. i'm so sorry, and i hope i'll do better some day.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1,641
Courage,
If you are feeling down and out, that would be completely appropriate right now.
Don't worry, you are grieving and worried.
You are in NYC, there are loads of great AA meetings in the city.
If nothing else, it would be somewhere to hang out for a while.
The 79th street workshop?
I bet you would feel better if you were not alone.
If you are feeling down and out, that would be completely appropriate right now.
Don't worry, you are grieving and worried.
You are in NYC, there are loads of great AA meetings in the city.
If nothing else, it would be somewhere to hang out for a while.
The 79th street workshop?
I bet you would feel better if you were not alone.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,452
hey, courage2, sounds like right now is just the time to come here to SR - we're all here for you when its tough. When it's easy, we can all go alone fine by ourselves, but when it's hard, we need each other!
So sorry to hear about the deaths of your 2 friends. That is very hard, and I am so sorry for your loss. So hang around and keep telling us how you're feeling.
ShootingStar1
So sorry to hear about the deaths of your 2 friends. That is very hard, and I am so sorry for your loss. So hang around and keep telling us how you're feeling.
ShootingStar1
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Alabama
Posts: 239
Best thing to do is talk and let it out.
One thing I have acknowledged in my new sobriety is that I am suppose to feel emotions and life / situations are not solved by alcohol / drugs.
I am so sorry for your loss - glad you came here to express it.
Toss
One thing I have acknowledged in my new sobriety is that I am suppose to feel emotions and life / situations are not solved by alcohol / drugs.
I am so sorry for your loss - glad you came here to express it.
Toss
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1,641
Windancer is right, you don't have to apologize to us.
Stay here a while and post a bit.
You are going to be ok.
This is a sad time.
Suicide is very sad.
It is usually an awful shock.
So many questions and regrets for everyone left behind.
Stay here a while and post a bit.
You are going to be ok.
This is a sad time.
Suicide is very sad.
It is usually an awful shock.
So many questions and regrets for everyone left behind.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
No need to be sorry...Why don't we talk about what we can do to get you better...I'm sorry for your losses....But we haven't lost you yet. There are ways to get better....What have you tried?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1,641
Courage,
The whole point of support is to help you and give you support when you are trying to stop or thinking of stopping, or wondering if you need to stop.
You don't have to be sober to come here!!!!
As long as you are not trying to get the rest of us to drink!
The whole point of support is to help you and give you support when you are trying to stop or thinking of stopping, or wondering if you need to stop.
You don't have to be sober to come here!!!!
As long as you are not trying to get the rest of us to drink!
p***enger
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,042
I'm reaching out to people who i haven't dealt with in years, because i think that avoidance is part of my problem (hence my screen name)-- but it's so hard!!! and then what's even harder is right after, to be confronted by some trivial work-related issue, when you just feel like saying to them, "this isn't life" -- but you have to act right.
In theory, i can avoid alcohol ok, but i can't avoid the things that make me want to drown my whole life in booze. PLEASE who can tell me how to do that? My alcoholic uncle hung himself, another died of cirrhosis, and my father was on a strict gin and cottage cheese diet on his deathbed with ALS. I don't want to go there, but that's where i'm headed.
In theory, i can avoid alcohol ok, but i can't avoid the things that make me want to drown my whole life in booze. PLEASE who can tell me how to do that? My alcoholic uncle hung himself, another died of cirrhosis, and my father was on a strict gin and cottage cheese diet on his deathbed with ALS. I don't want to go there, but that's where i'm headed.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1,641
Different times now Courage.
These are way different times.
Back in the day, even the women with hard-drinking idiot husbands would warn against trusting a man who doesn't drink!
You have absolutely no reason to believe that you are doomed to repeat their mistakes.
That is a self-fulfilling prophecy type mentality.
Right now, go easy on yourself.
Deal with things a day at a time.
You don't have to have all the answers today.
I come from a long and proud line of olympic drinkers.
I stopped and am going to stay stopped.
I am sad that they didn't live in a time where so much help is available, but no way do I consider it my destiny to go the same way.
Not only do I not intend to drink again, but I am making changes, slowly and patiently to be a very happy and sober lady.
And it is happening.
Oh, I get the whole work thing!!!! AAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH!
Yeah, it ain't all about work.
These are way different times.
Back in the day, even the women with hard-drinking idiot husbands would warn against trusting a man who doesn't drink!
You have absolutely no reason to believe that you are doomed to repeat their mistakes.
That is a self-fulfilling prophecy type mentality.
Right now, go easy on yourself.
Deal with things a day at a time.
You don't have to have all the answers today.
I come from a long and proud line of olympic drinkers.
I stopped and am going to stay stopped.
I am sad that they didn't live in a time where so much help is available, but no way do I consider it my destiny to go the same way.
Not only do I not intend to drink again, but I am making changes, slowly and patiently to be a very happy and sober lady.
And it is happening.
Oh, I get the whole work thing!!!! AAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH!
Yeah, it ain't all about work.
Clear Eyes Full Heart
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,272
Courage2 I'm so sorry for the news about your old friends. That is devastating and very sad. Dealing with the emotional aftermath of suicide is really difficult and you've had hard family things to go through as well. It's normal to feel sad, angry, bewildered, and defeated.
You sound like you have a desire to stop drinking and you've come to a place where you can get help and support for that. Even if you slip, people are here for you and you can get right back on the road to recovery. Tomorrow is a new day. Drinking will only make these losses harder to deal with-numbing your mind won't let it grieve and you need to be able to grieve to move forward.
You sound like you have a desire to stop drinking and you've come to a place where you can get help and support for that. Even if you slip, people are here for you and you can get right back on the road to recovery. Tomorrow is a new day. Drinking will only make these losses harder to deal with-numbing your mind won't let it grieve and you need to be able to grieve to move forward.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Pa
Posts: 4,872
Originally Posted by courage2 
I'm reaching out to people who i haven't dealt with in years, because i think that avoidance is part of my problem (hence my screen name)-- but it's so hard!!! and then what's even harder is right after, to be confronted by some trivial work-related issue, when you just feel like saying to them, "this isn't life" -- but you have to act right.
In theory, i can avoid alcohol ok, but i can't avoid the things that make me want to drown my whole life in booze. PLEASE who can tell me how to do that? My alcoholic uncle hung himself, another died of cirrhosis, and my father was on a strict gin and cottage cheese diet on his deathbed with ALS. I don't want to go there, but that's where i'm headed.
In theory, i can avoid alcohol ok, but i can't avoid the things that make me want to drown my whole life in booze. PLEASE who can tell me how to do that? My alcoholic uncle hung himself, another died of cirrhosis, and my father was on a strict gin and cottage cheese diet on his deathbed with ALS. I don't want to go there, but that's where i'm headed.
That's not where you are headed, that is why you looked for help, we are here for you.
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