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The `New Guy Post`

Old 11-28-2012, 03:22 PM
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The `New Guy Post`

Well, this is my first post, just got my account all setup, which has finally lead me to this `New Person` Forum. I can only assume that were suppose to tell a little about ourselves and discuss why we are here. I am fairly young, or as I see it, I am 29 years old/Single/No Kids/No Debt/Bach in CJ and blah blah blah. I joined the Air Force when I was 17 years old and served 10 years that contained 2 tours to Iraq and etc. I got out at 28 years old and got a `gig` in Iraq doing private security. As the USA begun to exist, so did my job which finally lead me to my current position working in AFGHAN.
I had my first drink of alcohol after basic training while going to school for my job. It was pretty harmless and I didn’t even like it, I had just turned 18 years old. I could have drunk as much as I liked at the time, but only had 2 beers because I found it `not so appealing`. Didn’t really think anything of it really, the next day I got up and went to Sunday church as always. I didn’t drink again for a while, didn’t even think about it.
My first base assignment was in Germany, where if you were 18 and over you could buy alcohol on base. I had this idea that I needed to drink, even if it was alone. At this point I had only had 3 beers in my whole life by had this notion this is what people do for fun due to movies, commercials, and etc. So I went to the BX and bought my very first case of beer. I had no preference in beer, in fact I didn’t even like beer. Honestly, at that point I was to scared to buy a bottle of liquor, thinking in a lot of ways that I wasn’t man enough to handle that yet, but to much of a man to drink wine, all based off of my 18 years of experience.
Either way, all of this came and lead to a down whirl spiral in which I would drink all of the time. If I wasn’t drinking then to me I wasn’t having fun; although I never had to drink for 18 years to have fun before this point. My working environment allowed me to show up drunk and no one really made too much of a fuss over it. There was a flock of us `drunks` at work and we would flock to gather at work and when off work to continue in our ritual behaviors’.
Either way, I could go on and on and on about all of these stories but there isn’t really much of a point; I suspect that if your reading this then you already share similar stories and already know where I am coming from.

So basically, from 18-29 years old I was drunk all of the time…there would be 6 months time periods where I would be drunk everyday and etc.

To spite this, just as I am sure many of you are, I was somewhat successful, at least from an outside perspective.

I know I am an alcoholic. I know that I do not like myself nor am I really having fun after about 2 weeks of drinking straight, it is really more just like a sickness that I have. My personality changes, I am not as motivated and etc….blah blah blah.

Seems what I struggle with is this irrational idea that I can drink sociable. I have had this idea before and 3 months later I am always back to where I was. I feel as if I am missing out on something or some fun event if I give up drinking completely. But I doubt that I could experience anything new in any bar that I haven’t already experienced in some other bar, I have done the bar `song and dance` for many years. All this said, I still fumble with this notion that I can become a social drinker, which I believe to be false, and that I would be missing out.

So in my first attempt to get help I seek a new path, a path that led me to this forum site. I am currently in AFGHAN and do not have the ability to drink, so I’m trying to get myself squared away before I get back…this idea that I will be missing out if I don’t drink when I get back. Well thanks for reading.

–Buzz Light Year `
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Old 11-28-2012, 03:25 PM
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Welcome to SR.

Stay safe in Afghanistan.
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Old 11-28-2012, 03:28 PM
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Welcome to SR!

Hugs and prayers,

Amy
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Old 11-28-2012, 03:32 PM
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Welcome to SR Buzz

It might be an idea to look into some recovery literature while you're sober to help you get over thinking that you're missing out. (AVRT, AA, SMART, Allan Carr's or Jason Vale's book...). Personally I can't think of anything that alcohol made more fun but it did make me loose the will to live. Sober life is so much better. Maybe try to focus on the positives rather than the perceived negatives of not drinking.

Glad you're here x
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Old 11-28-2012, 03:33 PM
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Welcome to SR. Now that you introduced yourself you are part of the familly.
Good move to admit this. Takes courage, almost as your duty mission ;-)
You are young, perfect time to have the rest of your life free of this.
I'm 38, some are older, but it's never too late.
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Old 11-28-2012, 03:35 PM
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Welcome. Good time for you to be checking out this site and the other posts, with the imposed dry spell. Maybe you can learn to have fun again sober?
And thank you for your service. Come back safe, and sober
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Old 11-28-2012, 03:42 PM
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I too am young, 29, and starting drinking at 15 at high school parties. I never liked the taste but the feeling of being drunk was what I was going for. I got kicked out of a high-rated college, went to the emergency room, drugged, raped, etc. All from drinking and wanting that buzz. That's not really worth it, is it? I have been to work many, many times over the years drunk. How stupid is that??

About a year ago, I decided to quit drinking during the week. As a teacher, it's really tough to put up with bratty children with a hangover. I decided to only drink on the weekends. I finally realized that I would drink enough on the weekends to make up for not drinking during the week.

So then I recently thought that I would only drink when I was with company, either at a bar or at my house. That didn't work either.

I have, however, realized that I can still have people over, go out to eat, even go to a bar and have as much stupid fun as I used to and not drink. I can drive myself home, nothing 'bad' happens with the opposite sex, I can remember the entire night, and get up before 10am to enjoy the rest of my weekend.

I have found that once I came to peace with not drinking alcohol, that it's the other person's problem if they have an issue with it. 'I don't drink.' That's the end of the story. Deal with it or get out of my face. Some family members have issues with my drinking and some friends are no longer friends because of it but that is their problem not mine.

I think being young and sober is a reality check for those who are sober and those who continue to drink. Who quits drinking before 50 or 60? Young, at a bar, and sober? unheard of. I do think that young people are realizing that they need to take care of their problem before it gets too late and that there are some who don't want to acknowledge their problem since you are no longer drinking.

Good luck, stay sober (it's the cool thing to do now!)
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Old 11-28-2012, 03:54 PM
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Pattyj, I looove you post and attitude ;-)
"get out of my face" I love it
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Old 11-28-2012, 04:13 PM
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Welcome Buzz. Thank you for serving.

Even though drinking turned me into someone I barely recognized, I clung to it too. I think it's so smart of you to realize you need to prepare for when you return. You're right, you'll most likely have those thoughts of missing out. We know it's a lie, but still we fall back into the same old behavior. This won't have to happen to you. Stay close to us, we want to help.
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Old 11-28-2012, 11:32 PM
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Thanks ... man you guys and gals sure make a new guy feel at home, your awesome. Happy Holidays

R/S
-Buzz Light Year
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Old 11-28-2012, 11:58 PM
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Welcombe Buzz! so much support here you are in the right place
I had difficulty moderating my intake, I couldn't drink socially as much as I tried it's never going to happen. I'm quite young too (25) and I agree with Patty - sober is definitely the cool thing to do these days you can go out and be as silly as you like because everyone else is drunk and doesn't even notice, then get in your car and drive home safely, shower, wake up fresh with no hang over and you even get to enjoy the next day .
I used to worry about being the sober one/odd one out but I am learning to embrace it and love it and after nearly 4 months off the booze I feel fantastic!
Good luck mate
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Old 11-29-2012, 04:54 AM
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first off, thank you very much for your service, buzz!!
second, welcome to SR.

there are a lot of things to do while sober, but considering there is such a period of time where we do not do any social activities that do not involve drinking, it's hard to imagine, but there certainly is. I am 25 and am learning this myself. have to agree with JungleGirl above, saying sober is the cool thing to do. it really is the case. I always feel so much better mentally and physically, greeting the day feeling normal, remembering everything that happened the night before.

I am sure the military can be a little rough with that, though. I know a few men serving their country right now and their drinking has skyrocketed. I'm not quite sure if it's been correlated, but it seems to be a trend, among the military. not much else to do on base maybe?

anyway, welcome. I am new too. there are many wonderful people on this forum and I am sure you will be able to find the support you require to beat this sickness.
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